Jehovers Witnesses leaders put tremenderous guilt and pressure on the flock. They never put tremenderous guilt and pressure on God.This is wrong for the simple fact God does not answer prayers regarding suffering and evil-
Anyway after the fiasco with the unbuttoned shirt sleeve in pt 1 of my story my eyes were opened to this callous organisation.
I was forced to assume grotesque qualities. I lost my ability to speak, as I new it best to remain silent to certain judgemental statements I heard.
I could no longer alter the expression of my face for fear of giving my true emotions away.
I was a tragic figure who could never succeed on my own efforts but always by Jehover and his organisation.
It was precisly in protest against the destructive absurdity of allowing this organisation to mould me into such a pathetic person that I decided to leave.
I conditiond my mind to see being an outsider of this social group as romantic and I looked forward to reclaiming my identity.