Hi again, I've been absent for a bit

by Marni Mai 7 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Marni Mai
    Marni Mai

    I was previously Crazyblonde (couldn't get into my account after being absent for a while 0_o).

    Long story short, things have been interesting.

    I'm successfully in the faded stage now. Got a bit of hounding - had a few elders calling and texting my husband about me (he's still in, kinda). Had an 'unexpected drop in' at our place too, which I didn't even know about until after as my hubby kept them outside. Got calls, txts and emails from a pioneer during the CO visit week. And got call and txt from an MS wanting to shout me lunch. Creep. I haven't replied to anyone. Haven't heard anything for a week or too now so hoping it will continue to stay that way!

    My husband is staying in, for whatever reason. He didn't say. He has started missing some meetings and only going to half of others. He doesn't like going alone and doesn't like being asked about me. So slowly he is going less and less, which is good. He doesn't want to hear anything from me about religion, but I'm hoping he's trying to find stuff out himself.

    I told my father about my thoughts (he's an elder), he admitted he had doubts and issues too, but seems to be clinging on for dear life to any shred of hope he can, even if it is a fantasy. He mentioned something to my mum too, who said something to my sister, and the usual chinese whispers way they thought I was joining another religion/committing sins/secretly sinning etc rather than just leaving for a normal life. So I explained a bit to my sister too. Then I got hit with the big long emotionally manuipulative preaching letters/emails from them. The whole 'here are all the scriptures proving we are right' and then the 'but we don't want you to die we want you to be forever with us and have forever in your heart'. Puke. I just told them that I loved them and wanted to keep in contact but won't argue and as such will not respond to preaching and emotionally manipulative correspondence. I have heard NADA since then lol.

    I also discovered my sister and my mother were spreading wacko untrue rumours about a df'd friend of mine, and then my sister started accusing me of misleading them about something that I didn't actually say but she tells everyone I did. So I think the less contact with them the better!! Bunch of hypocritical liars!

    Anyhoo, I hope to be on here more often now that my work seems to have unblocked this site.

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers

    Welcome back! It sounds as though your mom and sister are going to be pretty toxic to you until they can get a hold of ther irrational fears.

  • alanv
    alanv

    Good news Marni, it's not easy fading, you do tend to have to watch your back as the org doesn't like people in the in between stage. I know I am in the same situation as you. With me it is my son who is still in. Just one warning to you. They can theoretically disfellowship you if you have contact or a meal with your disfellowshipped friend.

    It sounds to me that it won't be too long before your hubby joins you. You are so right not pushing it. Just show all the family how much happier your life is now. I wish you well

  • mouthy
    mouthy

    Glad your back

  • crapola
    crapola

    I have the same problem with my mother. She uses my daed father as fuel, saying I won't ever see him again. But I finally told her I did'nt want to discsuss religion with her anymore as it just leads to frustration for both of us. It has worked for about 2 weeks now!

  • wobble
    wobble

    Good to have you back ! And you are still Crazy to me even if we have to call you something else now.

    I went through a little of what you are experiencing, but the family have all backed off now, just non-religious stuff if anything between us.

    It is early days for you though, so watch your back, and take advice on here if needs be.

    Good luck ,and welcome to freedom !

    Love

    Wobble

  • yknot
  • Marni Mai
    Marni Mai

    Thank you :) I'm glad to be back. Lets just hope my work doesn't block the site again! I have also started venturing online at home but trying to cover my tracks makes it hard sometimes.

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