by dig692 9 Replies latest jw friends
Hello all, I was wondering if any of you have every turned down a shepherding call, and if so, how did you do it? Did you just say "no thanks" or did you give a reason?
I need some suggestions on how to decline one myself, since running away from them at the hall will only work for so long
Thanks, I appreciate all your answers/suggestions!
I've not been to the meetings at all since the last Memorial but before that I'd get a phone call every now and then. I just told the brother that at the time I did'nt feel like there was anything anyone could do for me. But I'd let them know if I changed my mind. Guess it worked because they have'nt called back since.
I did from my asswipe piece o crap ex father in law PO
LOL @ wha happened?
I can tell you and your ex father in law musta been close.
But back to the thread, yes I've turned down a few and it was not that bad.
I would just politely say now is not a good time and that I appreciate the concern.
That usually worked but once I had a bulldog of a PO come to my house and try to press the issue by saying
"well if now is not a good time then when would be?"
It wasn't so much what he said but the way he said it that hit me wrong. Kinda snarky and condescending.
He found out quick I wasn't to be intimidated and I told him, "listen I tried being nice but I can see that didn't work,
so let me put it another way for you. I'll call you when and if I'm ready and you don't call me."
I didn't say it so graciously and he backed off real quick like.
I would like to say this to you tho....if people(read Elders here or any other "authority" figure) find out they can buffalo
you, then they will.
The best thing to do is let them know that there is boundaries to not be crossed and that you are going to try your best
to follow the scriptural admonition to as far as it depends on you be peaceable with all men.
So you're going to try and be nice,polite,peaceful with them but as the bible said to let your yes mean yes and your no
mean no and you already said no this is not a good time.
But if anything changes and you feel the need that you will call them. Thank you for time and concern but bye now.
Keep rinsing and repeating this as many times as needed in the future.
Most elders are too busy dealing with their own lives and the numerous congregation problems to consistently chase after "errant sheep" so I would just duck & dive for a while. You will soon fall off the radar.
I avoided one for six months or so by saying I could not make the suggested time, then my Group S.O,nice chap,meant well, said I can see you ..... and listed a load of different times, so I gave in and saw him.
I then told him that 1914 was crap, go and look it up, and come back and show me from the bible where the doctrine is. He did not return.
I eventually got the two Elder visit, where they have the D.F form ready in their pocket, but with advice from JWNers I dealt with that and have seen no-one since, about 18 months now.I stopped going to meetings months before this visit,and I ain't going back.
My advice is stall as much as you can,then handle with care, play the depressed card for awhile if you feel up to it.
Good Luck !
Love
Wobble
Yes, my wife did; they asked to come, she said, "If you are coming to tell the same old lies, forget it."
They have never returned, she still attends but is shunned by the elders and I am inactive.
fokyc
I like how you handled it, Stonewall.
They are going to have one hell of a miserable time trying to set one up with me. And, even if they did manage, I wouldn't show up for it or answer the door when the hounders come.
They are going to have one hell of a miserable time trying to set one up with me. And, even if they did manage, I wouldn't show up for it or answer the door when the hounders come.
