For me, part of the void I feel after having faded from the Witnesses is due to a lack of tradition that--albeit a little generic--helped to establish meaning and purpose as time went by.
Sometimes I long for traditions--religious or otherwise--that would help fill that void of watching time pass but not having any rituals to help give it meaning. But then I think how shallow it would be to join some religion, or try to convince myself intellectually that a certain god existed, just for the rituals involved.
How do you feel? Have you ever felt that void of tradition? And if so, how have you made up for it?
The Lack of Tradition
by daniel-p 8 Replies latest jw friends
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daniel-p
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beksbks
I don't know if this qualifies, but I absolutely love the seasons. I need the change. I usually change my cooking, home decor, etc depending on the season. I look so forward to each season, but by the time the next one comes along, I'm looking forward to it. I love football, the fall and winter holidays, but just as much, I love any kind of water activities, swimming, hiking in the summer. Love the garden in the spring..........it's just the cycle of life.
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beksbks
You know Daniel, this is probably one of the main things I feel the JW's have taken away from many of us. The ability to be happy and content in the here and now. It seems like we were just making it through our todays so we could get to the new order. As though today isn't good enough. I think to some extent, many religions are like that, particularly christianity.
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daniel-p
beks, seaons are huge for me too... unfortunately where I live we have 360 days out of the year of full sunshine and 70-degree weather. Perfect for the old folks, dreadfully boring for people like me. The change between summer and fall is marked by a 5 to 10 degree shift in the weather, and... that's it. No fall colors, no crispness in the air, no piles of leaves in the streets, no nothing. It's actully very depressing for me, believe it or not.
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daniel-p
You know Daniel, this is probably one of the main things I feel the JW's have taken away from many of us. The ability to be happy and content in the here and now. It seems like we were just making it through our todays so we could get to the new order. As though today isn't good enough. I think to some extent, many religions are like that, particularly christianity.
You're exactly right! i want so bad to just BE... live day to day and be happy with a domestic life. But no... have to be constantly after something... filling this ongoing void.
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undercover
What traditions did we have as dubs? The Memorial? The conventions? pfffffftttt. I do not miss those at all.
We missed out on traditions that a lot of other people have always had so you have to make your own traditions. That's what I've managed to do to some degree. There are certain things we look forward to each year...things we mark on the calender that we will do...it's what we must do, it's our tradition. They're not tied to anything religious...they're things we like, things we want to do.
Over the course of a few short years the things that we plan on have become our tradition. We look forward to them the way kids look forward to xmas. We start planning a month or two ahead of time, buying things or getting things ready. After it's over we cherish the memories and the photos and then after awhile we get excited about next year's event.
We've compiled quite a few things that are our private tradition. Others join in with us on a couple, but others are our private thing.
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beksbks
The change between summer and fall is marked by a 5 to 10 degree shift in the weather, and... that's it. No fall colors, no crispness in the air, no piles of leaves in the streets, no nothing. It's actully very depressing for me, believe it or not.
I believe it completely!! I used to live in Southern California, it was much like that. Also in San Francisco, which was also much like that, only colder. Hate it!! I know my soul needs the seasons.
Over the course of a few short years the things that we plan on have become our tradition. We look forward to them the way kids look forward to xmas. We start planning a month or two ahead of time, buying things or getting things ready. After it's over we cherish the memories and the photos and then after awhile we get excited about next year's event.
We've compiled quite a few things that are our private tradition. Others join in with us on a couple, but others are our private thing.
UC, you are exactly correct! What ever you base your new traditions on does not matter. It's the looking forward and the "cherishing the memories" that counts! Knowing it will happen again next year, or on the first of every month, or every Wednesday etc.
One thing too Daniel, it's up to us to make it happen. I know a lot of people who make the most out of the holidays, but I also know people who have had them all their lives, and just let them come and go. They regret it afterwards too.
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jamiebowers
What about celebrating the holidays or birthdays of those to whom you are close?
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WTWizard
They took away all traditions, such as observing the holidays and birthdays. You have to look forward to the REJECT Jesus Party, the Grand Boasting Session, and the new circus year--that was about it. And everything was planned out for you during these events: pio-sneering for the new circus year (or at least going out more), getting time off for a$$emblies, and sending invitations to people so they could reject Jesus. And nothing meaningful.
Everywhere, there are holidays. We are coming up on Halloween, and Christmas will be soon behind. People have different ways to celebrate those two holidays, whether it be a simple observation or a major event. Putting up decorations according to the seasons, having a day of Christmas caroling on December 24 or 25, celebration of birthdays, the annual vacation (which you couldn't do while in the cancer), and other periodical events could be used. If you have the seasons, enjoy them--if you are in a place where seasons are not there (the tropics where it is always wet or always dry, southern California, etc.), you can always schedule a week off at about the same time each year to travel somewhere that the climate is different.