Going to church

by crapola 9 Replies latest jw friends

  • crapola
    crapola

    How did you feel when you went to church for the first time? Was it so very different from the Witneses and did you feel guilty?

    I'm considering going for the first time with my daughter but am worried about what to expect.

  • skeeter1
    skeeter1

    I went to a BIG megladon Christian church. http://www.northpoint.org/ is/was my church. They have had explosive growth over the past 10 years, and alot of other churches come to them to figure out their formula. Their formula is to be a church that you're not embarrassed to bring your friends to. You can listen on the Internet, and I suspect it's what you'll get at alot of mainstream Christian churches. Alot of talk about making God/Jesus personal to your life. Not alot of guilt. Not alot of rules. Etc.

  • WingCommander
    WingCommander

    Hello! Well, this is an interesting topic, and one that is close to me as well. I have been attending an Advent Lutheran church about 5 times a year for the last 2 years. Each time, it gets a bit easier I admit. I actually attended the Easter service today. Guess what? No mention of bunnies, spring, flowers, chocolate, etc. It was ENTIRELY about Jesus, his sacrifice, the fact He has risen, the hope for mankind, etc. Nothing pagan was mentioned or seen AT ALL. Surprising, huh? Being raised a JW I thought the Easter Bunny was front and center and gave the sermon!!

    The first few times, I sweated bullets, not for being found out, but because I thought God would strike me down. It is a world of differance, let me tell you. Everyone is so personable to me, and the smiles and dress are not "for show". Anyone can dress the way they want...no more stuffy suits for me! I wear Chinos, dress shoes, Ralph Lauren shirt and blue RL blazer. No tie. I wore my JW suits at first, but it was just to creepy sitting in a new church in my old JW clothes. There are all kinds of people and all kinds of dress, and no one is judgemental. Imagine walking into a KH dressed all casual? Does YHWH God or Jesus even care?? I hardly think so. Should you dress like a bum? No, but you don't have to dress like the Oscars either like at the Memorial - a rediculous, showy display of materalism if I ever saw one!

    The services I have attended also are filled with something new and genuine that I have never experienced as well - singing praises and actually worshipping God and the One whom He sent forth - Jesus! It is incredible, live music played on instruments, REAL, heartfelt music - no canned monotonous drivel sung by drone worker bees. That always gets me. Of course, there is some reading and answering of the Paster, as it is a Lutheran service (Catholic light if you will) but I have to say it keeps me from getting bored, tired, and also keeps my interest. Too bad JW's aren't as interesting, huh?

    Know what else is amazing? I have two neices, 14 & 18, and they are so involved with the church (by their OWN choice) that it is unbelievable. Imagine, children actually WANTING to go to bible summer camp, do bible-based activities, charity work, choir, etc?? I remember growing up as a JW to be nothing but forced repetitive mandatory attendance and guilt-inducing rules and boredom. I am constantly amazed at the youth involvement at my in-laws Advent Lutheran church; talk about REAL "fruitages of the spirit"!!!

    They have classes and support groups for the abused, AA meetings, marriage counseling, and on and on. Gee, where is the JW's help? In the form of a guilt trip or Judicial Committee, that's where!! They have introductory classes for those whom are interested; and all are free to ask questions. I am seriously considering starting these next week, if even to learn more about their beliefs.

    In closing, I have really nothing negative to say; I am constantly amazed at all of the positive I see and hear, and how much it contrasts to the negative I heard spewn from the platform of the KH environment I grew up in. No wonder so many JW's (including my late parents) suffered from depression and a myriad of other mental health problems - constant negative reinforcement. It is mind-wrenching to live as a JW. Do they have good intentions? Probably, yes; they feel they have a monopoly on the Truth, and most know nothing else.

    I hope I have helped. Best Regards,

    - Wing Commander

  • skeeter1
    skeeter1

    I agree. The live Christian rock bands will throw you for a loop. As will the casual dress, and kids care. But, what will throw you most off are the missions to various parts of the world to do charity work. People actually go to third world countries to give aid, build, etc. It's their 'going into service". Sometimes, there are stay at home missions. My local church has a "wheels for charity" where the auto afficianado followers fix up donated cars and bikes to give to the poor. They also do free maintenance now, like free oil changes for anyone who stops by on their designated car care day. They are not into your wallet, they are into your time and talents.

    My first service's topic was "Why attend church?" They played a clip from the Little Rascals. One of the guys didn't want to go to church. He wanted to go fishing. Anyway, the gist of the topic was to talk about churches that don't foster you to grow as a spiritual, giving person. Apparently, alot of the old-time churches (including the JWs) failed in this respect. People went to dress up and for looks. If you go to a church to go through the motions, you're better off fishing.

  • babel on
    babel on

    greetings crapola from South Carolina

    I know exactly how you feel right now cause I felt the same way and in someway I feel its natural. Ive been attending church quite reguarly now for over 2 years now and still have not joined! The funny thing is there has been no pressure from anyone at any level to join and I think that is a testament in and of itself as to the difference between cults and Christians! I tried a few denominations and Baptist suits me best probably because it reminds me the leasts of the JWs in the things I hated ie. dogmatisim freedom in Christ as far as beliefs etc, they do call each other brother and sister although not to the creepy level of dubs! I am not trying to sell a belief system to you though as I hold to the notion that Christ will call you where he wants you. i have to agree with skeeter in that the internet is a great place to start getting aquainted with the format of what goes down prior to swinging the doors! I really like Dr. Charles Stanley insight for living. He has an internet ministry and lots of archives! I cant take the ranting mad hatter type and hes just not like that, if you check it out let me know what you think, i love the feedback god bless

  • StAnn
    StAnn

    It is odd to go into a church and see people dressed as they choose; to not be love-bombed; to be given the option to be either very involved or be a pew sitter. The list of differences goes on and on. Once you get past how different and strange it feels, it's actually quite nice.

    The first time I went in a church I sat and looked around. It was a pentecostal church. I remember my mother saying that you could FEEL Satan in churches, especially pentecostal ones! I sat there and waited. Felt a little draft, that's all. It was no big deal.

    Get up your nerve, go to the church of your choice, and enjoy yourself.

    But remember: how other people dress, etc., has absolutely nothing to do with your salvation. Don't get hung up on the little things that don't really matter.

    StAnn

  • skeeter1
    skeeter1

    Dr. Charles Stanley's son, Andy Stanley, is the preacher at Northpoint!

    Yes, attend an Internet service. That way, you can quickly shut it off if you don't like it.

    I have never officially "joined" a church. Too creepy for me. Plus, I am more agnostic these days anyway. I see the Bible as a historical document, but I don't hang on its every exacting word as the authority on God.

    Good ventures in your travels to your own conscious thought. You are about to embark on a wonderful journey. You are free to find a relationship with you and your Creator.

  • passwordprotected
    passwordprotected

    Going to a church service is scary for an ex-JW, but not as scary when you realise just about everything the WTS told you about church isn't true afterall.

  • Mrs. Fiorini
    Mrs. Fiorini

    Many former JWs feel strange or guilty going to a church after the WT. I never did. I think it's because when I left, I knew that there was no way the WT could be "the truth" and that any guilt belonged to them.

    I attended a few churches here and there out of curiosity to see what they were like. Some were comfortable, others weren't for me. Eventually I found what fit.

    Enjoy the adventure!

  • sooner7nc
    sooner7nc

    Don't go if you don't want to. Ashley wants what's best for you I know, but I think she would be alright with you declining.

    Love You

    M.

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