Happy to finally join the family

by JustWantTruth 42 Replies latest jw friends

  • passwordprotected

    Welcome JWT, great to have you here and great to see someone else who's managed to hold onto their Christian faith while mentally leaving the WTS.

    Psalm 27: 9 Do not conceal your face from me.

    Do not in anger turn your servant away.
    My assistance you must become.
    Do not forsake me and do not leave me, O my God of salvation.

    10 In case my own father and my own mother did leave me,
    Even Jehovah himself would take me up.

    These verse comforted me greatly while leaving the WTS. I lost my parents, my aunts and uncles, my cousins, friends I'd had for over 20 years and my young niece and nephew.

    It isn't easy, but it's possible to cope with the pain of lost relationships.

    Hebrews 13: 12 Hence Jesus also, that he might sanctify the people with his own blood, suffered outside the gate. 13 Let us, then, go forth to him outside the camp, bearing the reproach he bore.

    Jesus suffered immensely and sometimes we reach a point in our Christian life that we need to step outside the protection of the city, just as he had to, and endure the reproach he bore. It's painful, but it comes with blessings.

    PM if you need any support.

  • megaflower

    "Just Want Truth"- You have a PM and welcome!!

  • hubert

    Well, I finished reading your post, JWT.

    I would take "Oompa"s" advice, and lay low, tell them that you are just spiritually weak and need a little time to get back into it. Then, just fake it to keep your nephew in your life.

    Also, it might be a good idea to "make a deal with them", tell your brother and his wife (and your Mom and Dad) that you won't mention any more negative stuff about the Watchtower Society. (In order to keep your nephew in your life).

    I surely hope you don't lose him. This is the only way I can see you possibly keeping the peace, at least for now. In the meantime, do more research, post any questions you want to on here, and we will all try to help you as much as we can.

    Good luck, and again, welcome. (Thanks for the Revelation gem. I am already documenting that for my records).


  • Leolaia

    JustWantTruth....Great to have you on board! I would love to chat on whatever subject you have in mind. :))

    I am 22 years old and am a senior in college, reside in the US

    Congrats for going to college! I was 22 myself when I left the JWs for good (when I moved from home -- or rather, when home moved away from me), although I had been questioning for a number of years before this. With your dad being an elder, was it difficult to enroll in college, or did you have your parents' support? Did college help get you to realize things about the "truth" that you didn't know before? I totally immersed myself in the library in my first months at college, and got to read lots of Charles Russell's writings, plus "apostate" literature, and of course all the books on biblical scholarship.

    Last summer I began questioning, which quickly turned into doubting, with transformed into full on challenging.

    Yesterday slimboyfat started a thread that discusses how quickly one's stance can change even though doubts may initially have come more gradually.

    I believed for almost 22 years everything about the "truth" so I asked my parents sincere questions. That was, I feel, a mistake I made looking in hindsight, however I don't know if I am the type of person that can just sit on some of the stuff that I learned.

    Isn't that interesting? It's like what I was saying in another thread today. If you started off as an adult learning about the "truth", you are free to ask any question and voluntarily come to your own conclusion of whether the religion is "the truth". But for those who were first exposed to the religion as children, there is no such opportunity -- it is presented with the force of parental authority as the "truth", and the young mind is not able to critically examine the religion in the same way as a more experienced adult. But for those kids who get baptized, it's too late if you come to believe differently. When I was in your position, I didn't like not being able to think about certain things or come to conclusions that contradicted "dogma" but were otherwise supported by facts and logic. At least for me, cognitive dissonance didn't feel good, and I couldn't "just sit" on the stuff if I were expected to teach what I believed to be untrue door-to-door, or nod in agreement at the meetings.

    I was sitting in the book study while we were going over the Revelation book

    That book (as well as the Trinity Broshure) was one of the big things that got me to question the religion. I hadn't yet formally learned of the distinction between eisegesis and exegesis, but that book was a great object lesson in how arbitrary and unfounded the Society's "interpretations" are; it was patently clear that the wacky interpretations were being read into the text and did not arise from any natural reading of the biblical apocalypse. I remember one book study in particular when I was 20 or 21 and I had a ton of homework to do for Greek class and I thought, "What am I doing here, wasting my time on this gibberish, when I have some real biblical study to do?" (we were translating the gospel of Mark in the class). I think that was the last book study I ever went to.

    I noticed that in Revelation 22: 6 it says that Jehovah sent his angel while in verse 16 is says that" I, Jesus sent my angel". Who sent the angel?! I laughed and recalled hearing something about the society restoring God's name where it was taken out. I thought that maybe they had just made a mistake here so I did research first on the WT library then outside and to my shock found that not only did they add the name Jehovah 237 time but there was absolutely NO textual support for doing so in the greek or any of the other manuscripts. I started doing additional research and found how they have tried so hard to downplay the significance and deity of Jesus and I just felt that it was pathetic. I couldn't stomach it any more!

    Tell me about it! lol The Trinity broshure was the nail in the coffin for me...what bothered me was not the doctrinal truth of the matter but that the Society would lie to me by writing things that were factually untrue, and that I had to accept that as truth. The dishonesty about earthquakes also blew me away, and I also discovered on my own that what they taught about stauros and crux is contradicted by some of the very sources they cite.

    As much as it will hurt to lose my parents and my brother, it will just about kill me to lose my nephew. I couldn't love him more if he was my own child and, even though he is still very young we are so close to each other.

    I'm sorry that you must face this difficulty....I hope you will be able to find a way around things. It might be worth considering to keep your true doubts private and become inactive gradually over time, maybe saying if pressed that it is something you can't talk about but is something you're trying to work out (maybe implying depression and anxiety, if that is how your situation is making you feel). If you otherwise show yourself to be a loving, morally exemplary "good association" but spiritually weak, that might be a way to thread the needle and "leave" while keeping your family intact. But don't do anything before giving it a lot of thought...and hopefully some people here who have been in the same situation might be able to give you some advice. (I can't since I never was baptized and my family is pretty liberal and don't shun their other ex-JW relatives).

  • Quandry

    Welcome to the forum.

    Please lay low for now. You have not graduated from college. Make that your top priority right now. You cannot afford to get upset and make less than stellar grades.

    You need time to think about what to do....don't rush into anything. You'd think your brother would want to "snatch you out of the fire" instead of giving a sort of veiled threat......

  • poppers

    Welcome to the board. You'll find lots of support here.

  • BabaYaga
    Leolaia said: If you started off as an adult learning about the "truth", you are free to ask any question and voluntarily come to your own conclusion of whether the religion is "the truth". But for those who were first exposed to the religion as children, there is no such opportunity -- it is presented with the force of parental authority as the "truth", and the young mind is not able to critically examine the religion in the same way as a more experienced adult.

    Poignant and terrifyingly true, Dear Leolaia.

  • PEC


  • Wasanelder Once
    Wasanelder Once

    So good to hear from you! It's been ages since this sort of enthusiasm has been seen. Welcome. Sorry about your family situation. I can't say it will get better but I won't encourage you to cave in to them either. Stay the course for your own sanity. Again, so good of you to come! W.Once

  • yknot

    Welcome JWT!!!

    Congrats on impending graduation!

    Sending prayers of comfort and guidance your way as you navigate uncharted territory with your family.

  • jwfacts

    Welcome. It is heart breaking to hear what is happening with your family. Many of us have been through the same and are here to support you whatever happens.

  • Barbie Doll
    Barbie Doll


  • mostlydead

    Hello JWT! It's very difficult to suddenly have to curb the impulse to speak out when you observe these errors and contradictions, when you've been taught all your life to do just the opposite (to those of 'the world' of course.) I agree with the posters who've encouraged you to be cool, especially until you're done with school. Sometimes we're convinced of things mentally long before we're prepared to act on them emotionally. Give yourself time for your emotions to catch up to your knowledge. I'm sorry you're having to deal with this, there's very little more difficult in life than what you're going through. I know you'll find a lot of encouragement and good advice here.

  • dinah

    Welcome!!! Our cyber-family is a bit dysfunctional at times.....but I love it! Glad you got to join!

  • Truth and Justice
    Truth and Justice

    Hi JustwantTruth,

    Its a pleasure to have you, this a good place to truly encourage and upbuild those who are suffering. I'm sure your story will inspire people. I too have hope that the other half of my immediate family will be rescued. I pray daily for them to get out, and it is certainly something I have not given up on, and that is my praying to my Heavenly Father for real strength.

    May Happy Trails come your way!

    Sincerely, Truth and Justice

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    Wow. That was quite some first post.

    I have been here for years and not told that much about my situation.

    Welcome to the forum


  • BonaFide

    Hi JWT, welcome. It seems like we are in the same position in many ways. You express yourself better though. I got in trouble and called an "apostate" by some of my family and friends because I brought out truthful things about the Organization. So now I am underground, and I use reverse psychology, or something like it. If you read my posts you will see. It's working for me. Basically what I do it I say, "I believe in the Organization and the GB no matter what." Then I bring out whatever truth I have been researching. Then I say again, "But I will wait on Jehovah and his Organization."

    It's working pretty good for me.


  • cawshun

    welcome, the more the merrier

  • JustWantTruth

    Hey thanks everyone for all the love, encouragement, and great advice. I got caught up with school for a while but now I am back. Thanks again!!!!

  • Chalam

    Hi JWT,

    Great post and welcome too!

    Yes, Jesus is key as several other posters mention. Do your own research. Invite the Holy Spirit to guide you when you read the bible (make sure you use anything but the NWT).

    John 16:13 (New International Version)

    13 But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come.

    Let Him counsel you, not the blind guides of the WT!

    John 15:26 (New International Version)

    26 "When the Counselor comes, whom I will send to you from the Father, the Spirit of truth who goes out from the Father, he will testify about me.

    I cannot imagine what it might be like to be cut off from family and friends but this might help you.

    Mark 10:28-30 (New International Version)

    28 Peter said to him, "We have left everything to follow you!"

    29 "I tell you the truth," Jesus replied, "no one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for me and the gospel 30 will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age (homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children and fields—and with them, persecutions) and in the age to come, eternal life.

    All the best,


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