Obsessing vs Living

by joelbear 5 Replies latest jw friends

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  joelbear

  I posted in another thread that I felt like maybe I was at last turning a corner. I sure hope so anyway. I'm getting too old to keep spending my days in a whirl of worry and doubt.

  I've started pretending that my brain has a switch which one way says Obsess and the other way says Live. I am also keeping myself busy with chores or reading or doing something to keep my mind occupied. It seems to be working.

  Maybe my fits of a few weeks ago squeezed out some poison.

  I agree that part of the new path has to be more giving to others and more forgiving of others for not being what I expect them to be.

  I hope I can look forward in anticipation to what's around the next corner and I sure hope lots of yall will journey with me.

  hugs

  Joel
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  Billygoat

  You've touched on a point that I really struggle with...

  I agree that part of the new path has to be more giving to others and more forgiving of others for not being what I expect them to be.

  Two parts here...

  1. Giving to others has so many interesting healing properties. It takes me away from myself and sees others for who they are and what they're going through in Life. And at the same time it helps me heal myself.

  2. I realized that my expectations of others were actually a selfish desire of mine. That I expected others to act, speak, live a certain way because I wanted them to. Hmmm. Isn't that what I had been fighting for years as a rebellious JW teenager? I hate it when people put their expectations on me, so I realized I needed to do one thing...

  Live and let live.

  That meant not just changing my behaviors, but also changing my way of thinking. Both are hard to do, but when you experience the freedom of your own expectations, it does get easier. You have a great heart Joel! I've really enjoyed watching you grow over the last few months I've been here. Thank you!

  (((((Joel)))))

  Andi - turning the corner with you...
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  kevin221

  Joel,
  I agree with Andi, you have a great heart. Please take care and know that you are appreciated and loved.

  Peace,
  Kevin

  Here's hoping we can all turn that corner together.
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  Billygoat

  (((kevin)))

  I hope you are doing well sweetie! You're in my thoughts often! Please keep us updated with how things are going with Jonjon's dad. We're here to listen...

  Andi
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  safe4kids

  Hey (((joel))),

  You know, it's funny. I rarely comment on your threads and yet, so often, you speak my truths. Maybe that's why I don't say anything. Learning how to live as an adult is a hell of a journey. Sometimes, it makes me angry, sometimes depressed and sad, sometimes confused, feeling like I'm groping in the dark (and not in a fun way!). But for all the times that I bruise my shins and my heart on life's corners, I still wouldn't trade this journey for anything. Not having all the answers is quite frightening at times but if the option is to live like a fundy, no thanks! I'll take the hard knocks and the broken hearts because at least I'm experiencing life, instead of passively watching it pass me by.

  Joel, you're a good man. The world is tougher on those with sensitive and compassionate hearts but don't you think the trade off is worth it?

  (((Kevin))), good to see you here. I do think about you often although I don't say much. As Andi said, many of us are here to listen.

  Dana

  Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end...
  Closing Time, Semisonic
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  more2C

  ((((Joel))))

  I enjoy reading your posts, and I think your new topics that you introduce are interesting as well. You really aren't afraid to bring up your sensitive side, which we all love. That's rare and unique in a man, (at least the ones I'm meeting) anyway You're the Best!

  more2C