Jesus couldn't have said it clearer and Satan is truly at work! I haven't really posted anything since my last post about my wife and her family's influence but...MAN has s**t has hit the fan! sorry if this post will seem long to most of you, but I'm gonna try to summarize it and add detail at the same time the best way i can.
To refresh some memories, last time i posted was when my wife tried to stop me me from taking my daughter to church and her family's influence wasn't making it any better. Lets continue...
The day after i made that post, I came to the realization that, at that time, it would be impossible to take my daughter to church w/o fighting my wife over it. and the shock that she was willing to go over the "head of the household" bit to suit her needs. That next day, I told her that I was leaving and going back to PA by myself and tell my job to plan a transfer, because it wouldn't be fair for me or anyone to live in an unfair marriage. Another reason why is because I've grown tired of playing "Bible Hop-scotch" when they called themselves "trying to help me understand the Bible more". When I told her that, she got seriously furious...saying things like I'm abandoning my family and such, whereas she failed to realize she caused me to come up with that decision. Later on that day I thought about it and asked her what if I'm making the wrong decision. She did the right thing and seeked advice from 3rd parties(co-workers, friends, etc.) and admitted that what she said was wrong and i have every right to take my daughter anywhere i want to take her. Basically, we kissed and made up.
NOW! 3 weeks ago, my job site where I'm working at down here is being taken over by another company. I still have an opportunity to stay with the company but i have to transfer out of SC. I wanted to stay with the company i work now, so i talked it over with my wife about the transfer. Apparently, her job has a site in PA as well and she feels like she can make it anywhere, including getting reinstated up there -_- but nevertheless, it was going to work out for all of us, including my daughter because she has family and friends her age as well.
This is where it gets interesting. 2 days after we planned our transfers for December, my wife didn't know how to tell her mother the news because she has grown very attached to her granddaughter and it will, of course, make upset to see her leave. That night before I went to work, her mother figured it out. How? I dunno. But she did. At first she seemed cool with it. She took my daughter downstairs to put her in her playpen and she came right back up to our room. Next thing you know, she EXPLODED! At who? Me. Saying I don't care about the well being of my wife and my daughter and how i'm trying to stop her from getting reinstated, saying I'm tearing down her faith(both me AND my wife knew it wasn't true) and continues on with her rant.(mind you, while she's in front of my face insulting me and pointing fingers, i sat quietly). Next thing you know, she tears down MY faith! Talking about what churches do, what we practice, Babylon the Great, the whole nine yards. Thats when I got in her face defending my faith, playing more "Bible Hop-scotch"(which i shouldn't have done because I felt like I had to do it, and on top of that I raised my voice at her and should have kept my cool...). She went as far as pointing fingers at me, snatching the Bible out of my hand when i was trying to show her a certain verse from her own Bible, and calling me a form of Satan!(I was LOL inside my head, with a bewildered look on my face at the same time)Right before I went to work, she wanted me to leave to go back to PA that following week. That basically put a stop to ALL of our plans because we know we cant afford to look for new jobs knowing how bad the economy is and the transition at my job site begins in December. That night my wife noticed how manipulative her mom was getting and she couldn't take it anymore. So my wife and i had no choice but to look for our own place to stay down here and i had to go on with the new company and the transition.
That very same next day, we found an apartment and could move in that following week. Once again, here they come. When we came into their house and starting packing our things, my brother-in-law(my wife's oldest brother) snapped on her about going with me and what happened between me and their mom. She was ready to swing at him because he dont even know what happened, but its obvious he will side with what his mom said. Meanwhile, her father came in from work and talked to me and my wife together, saying our marriage will never work out because we're unevenly yolked and he has seen too many unevenly yolked marriages break up(which is utter bull because me & my wife know 1 Cor. 7:12-14 tells unevenly yolked couples to work it out). My wife was starting to get stressed out at the fact that her family is being manipulative and she knows their actions are not Christian like as they claim. In result of the "disorder" in their home, they told us we had to leave immediately, but offered my daughter to stay with them(WTF!?)
That weekend we were stressed out, going out of our minds because at that time we were on a serious tight budget because we had to save our money until the move-in date so we couldn't afford to stay in a hotel. Luckily, my wife has other family down here in SC as well. She has a cousin who's and inactive JW thats unevenly yolked as well. She was supposed to get D/F because of it, but the elders couldn't get to her on time. But anyways, she offered us a place to stay until we move in to our apartment. So that week, its been back and forth to work, her parents' house, and her cousins' house. Thank God gas went down when it did. :)
Til this day, we're living in our apartment thats not too far from her parents' house because they can watch our daughter over the weekend while we work 3rd shift. But it feels good that we're under nobody's influence and we can raise our family the way WE want to. It's been rough for the past 3 weeks, but I finally signed in to tell everyone one of the most unreal things i EVER had to experience. I was apart of the family, now I feel like an enemy(except to her youngest brother because he knows how his mother can get and he knew it wasnt right what they have done to us). Now that my wife recognizes how manipulative her parents are, I'm patiently waiting to see if she will feel the same way about the Watchtower Society...but that's another story.
It was obvious that me and my wife did the right thing and move out of there. The only time my wife speaks to her family is if her mother calls us, or when we drop off or pick up our daughter from there house. My wife will still remain a faithful JW and still seeking to get reinstated. I just decided to leave it alone and do my own thing until something happens or we end up sharing what the Bible says. And believe me, by gathering helpful info from all of you here on JWD, and reading my Bible independently, I know exactly where to start...just waiting for the perfect time.
By Their Fruits...
by XxJazzxX 9 Replies latest jw experiences
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XxJazzxX
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JWdaughter
It will be good to get your child out of the clutches of her grandparents ASAP! I hope everything works out for your family. Maybe the busyness of the move to PA will distract your wife from her reinstatement project for awhile.
Shelly -
Honesty
Read your original post again.
I read it 3 times and each time I came to the conclusion that your MIL is demon possessed.
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penny2
You've been through a lot - hope it gets a little easier!
penny
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carla
sorry for your continuing situation. Why are you leaving the most precious thing in the world with the crazy mil? I would be ready for a possible custody battle with the inlaws if I were you. If one of you need to find a different job so you are on opposite shifts that is what you need to do to protect your child. Have you not read all the horror stories involving jw inlaws & families?
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LouBelle
sjoe man, don't know how you handle all that drama! It's best that you are out of a situation where other people are interferring in your marriage and life.
All the best for the future.
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StAnn
I'm a little confused. Are you guys in the apartment until you both move to PA in December? Because December is only a week away and I've never known of apartments you could rent for only two weeks. Is your wife going with you when you go to PA or coming up later?
StAnn
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cameo-d
Better a crumb of bread in peace than a banquet in strife. (that's in the Bible somewhere)
Glad you are out of the demon pit. Hope your wife will see how detrimental and obsessive religion can be and esp. when people are mandated to attend religious sessions 3 or 4 days a week.
Maybe you can suggest to her that the two of you just try to "live your religion" instead of nitpicking and arguing doctrine.
Hope she has seen enough to not want that kind of continual lifestyle. If choosing peace means "leaving jehovah" than so be it!
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XxJazzxX
trust me, i'm more than happy enough to get out of that hell pit. my wife is thinking about hiring a babysitter to stay at our apartment during the week so we wont have to run my daughter back n forth.
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XxJazzxX
StAnn
To sum it all up, our original plan was to move to PA in December, but because of what happened at my MIL's, we're forced to stay down here and find a place over our heads here in SC. I have no plans in leaving my daughter in my inlaws' clutches. I'm gonna teach her everything i know and the REAL truth of the Bible, while my wife tries to do the same. I'm afraid that she is gonna grow up confused, but it is better if she can experience other religions backgrounds and interact with other people as well instead of sticking to one and hearing about the other. I will teach her how to research and test everything just like the Bible says.