The Apostate Version of "Little Red Riding Hood" by a horny apostate wolf...
ONCE upon a time, near the edge of the Watchtower farm, lived a young sister and her Witness mother.
One day the mother made a beautiful hood for the young sister out of a piece of lovely red silk, and the young sister wore the red hood whenever she went door to door.
SHE was soon known by everyone in the local congregation as "Little Red Riding Sister."
Little Red Riding Sister’s worldly grandma lived at a nearby community, all by herself.
One time when Little Red Riding Sister’s mother had baked some lovely cookies, Little Red Riding Sister asked her mother if she might take some to grandma and use this as an opportunity to Witness to her.
Mamma put the little red bonnet on the young sister’s head and filled the basket with fresh cookies and Watch Tower’s and Awakes.
LITTLE Red Riding Sister skipped through her neighborhood toward her grandmother's house. She stopped at a nearby Internet café to find an online card to send her grandma, as she knew grandma spent all day playing on her computer.
MANY beautiful websites flitted across her path in her search for an e-card and Little Red Riding Sister went investigating them.
She did not try to find any un-theocratic sites, though, for that would have displeased her local body of elders, and they could be very mean when they were upset.
There were so many sites though to choose from and she just needed a little advice on where to find a cool card for grandma and she decided to try Jehovah-Witness.Com expecting to see helpful brothers and sisters with good ideas for e-cards.
Instead, a apostate wolf quickly answered her post and began to talk to her.
"WHERE are you going, Little Red Riding Sister?" the apostate wolf asked, as he added little smiles in his post to the young sister.
"I am taking this basket of lovely cookies and Watch Tower’s and Awake’s to grandma who lives very close by", she replied.
THE apostate wolf talked up Little Red Riding Sister a bit more, and, after finding out just where the grandmother lived, he logged offline and jumped into his car and disappeared.
LITTLE Red Riding Sister had never met any apostate wolves before, but she was a bit concerned about talking to apostates, however, she was a brave little girl, and was not frightened as she knew Jehovah would always look after her and protect her.
After a while she came to where a Witness was standing on the street trying to get people to take tracks..
WHEN Little Red Riding Sister told him of the apostate wolf, he was surprised that the apostate had not attacked her.
"Perhaps the apostate knew we would come to your assistance", he said.
"I am not afraid", Little Red Riding Sister told the brother as she left him and walked down the sidewalk.
The little cottage in which Red Riding Sister’s grandmother lived looked very lonesome as the she crossed the yard and walked up to the door.
ARE you there, Grandma?" Little Red Riding Sister called as she knocked at the door.
"Yes, my child," answered a loud gruff voice.
"That cannot be grandma’s voice", thought Little Red Riding Sister, "for her voice is sweet and low".
"Why do you not open the door, grandma?" asked the young sister, for grandma had never behaved in this manner before.
I am sick in bed with a terrible cold, my dear. Just open the door and walk in!"
So Little Red Riding Sister opened the door and walked in.
MY! What a sight met her eyes; chairs were turned over, beer cans were all over the floor, ashtrays were full of cigarette butts and on grandma’s big screen TV there was a porno tape playing.
THEN Little Red Riding Sister looked at her grandmother in the bed.
"Why grandma, how your hands have changed; they used to be soft and white and now they are covered with dark stains", the child exclaimed.
"I have been reading the Watch Tower publications and the cheap ink rubs off on my hands and stuck to my fingers."
“WHAT large eyes you have grandma!" exclaimed Little Red Riding Sister, as the figure in the bed peeped its eyes out from under the covers.
"All the better to see the real truth with, my dear."
"But, grandma, what a big nose you have."
"All the better to smell the Societies B.S. and the cookies in your basket."
"But, grandma, what large tongue you have!"
ALL the better to eat you out with!" and with these words the apostate wolf, who had been pretending he was Little Red Riding Sister’s grandmother, seduced the young sister and engaged with her in gross unchristian conduct and oral sex.
THE apostate wolf had scarcely finished with the young sister when the door flew open and the Elders rushed in with their Bible’s open.
WHEN the elders suggested that the apostate wolf leave, Little Red Riding Sister’s grandmother came out of the guest bedroom where she had been hiding and thanked the apostate for showing her granddaughter how wonderful it is to be human.
THE apostate wolf pretended that he was a nice guy, said the grandmother, "But I knew by his seductive and sexy voice that he wasn’t, and so I let him in, and got a little on the side.”
"We are still glad we arrived here to discover this spiritual crime," said the elders.
WE knew those apostate’s are up to mischief on Simon’s site when one of us talked to Little Red Riding Sister back in the corner, we knew we had a committee meeting coming up."
After dismissing the apostate and kicking the grandmother outside and locking her out of her own house, the elders did some tidying up the room a bit, had a beer from the fridge, and the committee meeting was on..
After Little Red Riding Sister confessed her sins the meeting was finished and disfellowshipped, the elders then took the silk hat off of the young sister and put it in their briefcase.
"You not only have caused your granddaughter to be shunned but we have taken her red hat,” said the elders as they left the house to the grandmother.
But soon the former Little Red Riding Sister was very happy that her dear grandmother and her had developed a very good relationship and, after visiting the rest of the month with her grandmother, former Little Red Riding Sister now routinely visit’s Simon’s discussion board and jokes and teases the apostate wolves and is enjoying her new freedom and the realization that she walked down the right path.
There was nothing more to fear now that the big bad elders no longer call.
The End
Hope you all know LRRS was 18 and there were no wolves hurt in the making of this story.
Skipper
All great deeds and all great thoughts have ridiculous beginnings--Albert Camus