I am female, 40, and have been in a relationship for 18 months with a wonderful man who has two children from his first marriage. They are girl age 12 and boy age 9. We live in Australia.
In the last 10 months, the children's mother (with whom they live 9 days a fortnight), has been brainwashing them against us. They accept her commands, and obey her even when they are with us for a weekend. They will not answer us honestly, even the most mundane queries (what did you do last weekend? Go to the beach?) They spy on us and tell their mother, who has taken us to court 3 times this year, trying to reduce their father's contact time from 5 days a fortnight to 1!!! She has forced the daughter to go to the government department of Family Services and lie about her father (allegations of sexual abuse). She has taken out a restraining order (aka DVO in Australia) on the father for no good reason (Australian courts hand them out like candy/lollies) claiming that he is harassing her.
We have in our final orders from the Family Court that the children are not allowed to be baptised into any religion until they are 16 years old. We did this to buy ourselves some time for the kids to see for themselves what the Watchtower is about.
We are stressed to the max because the kids are not themselves. Won't participate in any real discussion. Won't accept their father's parental authority without judging him as 'led by the devil'. The daughter regularly tells lies, and when challenged with the truth, becomes angry and believes her father is Satanic. Won't discuss her anger, neither will his son. Actively participate in setting up their father to fail.
It's sickening. They are learning their tricks from their mother who is adept at avoiding 'the truth' in any situation. They blame others for their mistakes.
Does anyone have some good advice - how to overcome this adversity??
It is so difficult to keep on giving to these kids who treat us like s*** and seem to believe that we are of the devil.
I feel betrayed by the spying and tale-telling (to the mother) after every visit. I feel as if I am living in a fish bowl. I find it hard to be my authentic self around these kids for fear that their mother will use that against us somehow. She slings an arrow into our camp on the average of once a week or so.
Help!!