SATIRE: If it works for The Flood...

by VoidEater 7 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • VoidEater
    VoidEater

    Belief in fire is widespread, and there is a culture-spanning panorama of equating "earthly fire" to "heavenly fire" (Encyclopedia Britannica, "Nature Worship").

    The divine source of fire is found in many mythos; a small sampling:

    Greek Prometheus, a giant, steals fire from the the god Zeus
    Cherokee The Thunders, spirits from the Above World, bring fire
    Hindu The deity Agni is, in essence, fire and is it's source
    Klamath Coyote, a totem animal, steals fire from "fire beings"
    Maori Maui brings fire (for a second time) from the Underworld
    Zoroastrianism Fire is a god
    Australian Fire is stolen from Whale, a totem animal
    Mongolian Swallow, a totem animal, steals fire from sky god Tengri

    It is clear, since so many culture have the same myth, that fire indeed comes from God and is his tool. Eathly fire is an extension of this divine power. Many of the myths talk about how fire was stolen from God, and therefore it would be wrong for us to make fire or use it.

    We should avoid matches, natural gas, and the internal combustion engine. Fireplaces are naturally a pagan symbol that must be avoided.

  • nomoreguilt
    nomoreguilt

    Exactly my point....That's why I was df'd!!! I put a cigarette in my mouth and used FIRE to ignite it. Hence the ban on smoking, I stole the gods' FIRE.

    NMG

  • BFD
    BFD

    It's cold here and the furnace is cranking! Apparently, NYSEG is a god.

    BFD

  • SirNose586
    SirNose586

    Interesting what happens when you follow the logical conclusion of Borg logic applied to a fairy tale....

    Well done, voideater!

  • darkuncle29
    darkuncle29

    If I light my farts, do I contain the power of god?

  • darkuncle29
    darkuncle29

    Anybody got a match?

  • BurnTheShips
    BurnTheShips

    That rocks VOID!

    Very clever!

    Burn

  • R.Crusoe
    R.Crusoe

    If you want fire between your thighs I may have once come running!

    Now you need to ask for it to be in your heart!

    As well!

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