A prayer I'd like to hear

by JimmyPage 5 Replies latest jw friends

  • JimmyPage

    "Jehovah we come before you at this time to thank you for the guidance you give us through the Governing Body. We thank you that in 1919 when Jesus came to inspect his belongings that he appointed these men of truth to help us in spite of the fact that they still celebrated Christmas and venerated the cross. We thank you that brother Rutherford was there to enlighten us and that even though the faithful men of old did not appear on earth in 1925 to his house in San Diego we know that he was not a crackpot but an anxious seeker of truth. We thank you for the new light you have given us to help us understand that fractions of blood are now okay to consume if your conscience allows it. We thank you for the peace of mind in knowing that mankind will not destroy himself in a nuclear holocaust because you will destroy 99.9% of mankind yourself instead. May we always attend all meetings and strive for at least ten hours of service each month so that we may be preserved alive through this. All of this we pray in the name of your Son Jesus Christ, amen."

    Anyone have anything they'd like to add? :)

  • loosie

    We thank you for showing us how to come up with the library card excuse to explain away why we joined the UN.

  • VoidEater

    And thank you for keeping the congregation clean of the blight of pedophilia, that none of our young ones have had to withstand the horrors of rape or molestation nor the desperate hopelessness of not being believed; thank you for directing the Elders to always report the slightest hint of impropriety to the appropriate authorities so that your name and your organization have remained unblemished.

  • JimmyPage

    Oh yeah... "Thank you for the Children book in the 1940's encouraging everyone not to have kids because the end was so close."

  • SPAZnik

    hahahaha - awesome!

  • WTWizard

    And, thank you most of all for starting us on the road toward the Second Dark Ages.


Share this