Do You Miss Loved Ones But.......

by freydi 5 Replies latest jw friends

  • freydi

    Are you glad they'r gone?

  • DT

    If you are talking about people who are still alive, but trapped in the cult and refusing to associate with me, then yes, in a sense. I'm very concerned about them and hope they escape. However, while they are captives of that mindset, I'm glad to be free from their toxic influence.

  • R.Crusoe

    A slightly odd question - do you mean dead?

    I spent most of my life missing some kind of loving bonds with my family that I now accept will never exist and even when it seemed they might certain events felt very contrived and controlling as if some one somewhere was always doubting or wanting some say in things which destroyed ny chances of family atmosphere as far as I could tell!

    One of them situations where I just sat in complete isolation with no idea of why how or anything really!

    After the years I had to put my family to rest - even though they live - just to stop myself from hurting so much at some 'new system' style hope that will never come!

    So I'm hurt and always will be but have adjusted to the idea that it is now set in stone just so I can lose some of the open emotions that bled for so many years!

    Glad isn't an emotion I feel over such things - just regret and confusion and sadness that things are the way they are and will always be! I've past all the stations of turn around!

    But one who is dead has effectively changed my whole life for the worse for all sorts of reasons just by not being here for me!

    And I'm still unsure if any of the above answers your question?

  • jamiebowers

    I miss the person that my mom used to be but am glad that I don't have to constantly defend my new way of life to her.

  • Maddie

    A curious question but it is possible to miss loved ones and at the same time be relieved that they are no longer in our lives. It depends on the relationship we had with that person, but in my own case I could never be glad of being shunned.


  • compound complex
    compound complex

    Greetings, freydi:

    In agreement with the other posters, I have to say it's a love-hate scenario.

    As we hark back to earlier times, we imagine an idealized relationship when we enjoyed some good moments together. But the reality is that we were often at opposite poles emotionally, mentally and religiously.

    We still love them but are relieved not to be in their constant company.

    Sigh ...


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