My Fade Process

by senora 9 Replies latest jw friends

  • senora
    senora

    I'm upset. I moved to a new hall because I want to fade. The jerks in my last hall are taking months to send my publisher card. I can't stand going to the meetings and I haven't been to a book study in like 3 months. I know they are communicating with the elders in my new hall about my attendance because when I had missed a couple of meetings this publisher (an older single brother with no title) from the old hall called trying to ask me about my meeting attendance and my book study. I was so upset but I didn't show it. I didn't answer his questions and just stated that we are not friends and I don't understand why he is calling me asking me anything and I would prefer that he not call me anymore because I don't talk to brothers on the phone that I'm not interested in dating or marrying. I didn't want to hear any explanation or anything, I basically cut it so he couldn't ask me anything nor expect a response.

    All of this is making sick, what exactly to they expect from doing all of this? I can't believe the spying that I'm going through and that's not the half. This is some crazy crap. Every spy they send I cut off, they want to find out what I'm doing. I can have a purely ligitimate reason why I'm not at all of the reason, which I do have a plan up my sleave, but I don't see why they have to do all of this. Just send my damn publisher card!!! Should I just ride it out or send a letter?

  • blondie
    blondie

    Get caller ID and screen your calls. You don't have to answer any questions. There will be a flurry of "interest" but gradually they will just ignore you as long as you aren't doing anything they could DF you for.

    Love, Blondie

  • cognac
    cognac
    I don't talk to brothers on the phone that I'm not interested in dating or marrying.

    Quick thinking!!!

    Do you have family still in?

  • flipper
    flipper

    SENORA- Just stop going to meetings. Why request your old publishers record card to be sent ? It will just give them more control over you- and they will drive you even crazier because they know exactly where you are - and your goings on. When I moved from my old area hour and a half south of where I live, I had stopped going to meetings and just faded without telling them where I was going. I think that is the better option. Realize , the Jehovah's Witnesses are all about controlling their members lives , it's power and control with them - they can only have as much power over you as you let them. Don't let them have it- and they won't. Just an idea. Just don't return their calls , or hang up when they call. It's what I did when I first faded. It worked in time. Good luck to you, Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • senora
    senora

    Well I have 1 family member in the borg and they live a town away from me.

    If I leave my publisher card in the old hall they will tell everyone, it will spread like wild fire. I know a lot of people in that area and I don't want it to get out in that area. I'm in a new town where I don't know anyone and I just prefer to fade where no one knows me because then my phone will really be ringing off the hook. And plus the people in my old hall will be happy because they are so evil and coniving. I don't want them to think my fade is because of their deceitful schemes and traps. Trust me, there is a method to my madness, I know what I'm doing. I just have to stick it out a little longer. I'm not doing anything that I can be df'd for so they can forget that.

  • cognac
    cognac

    I'd say call the elders every other day to get the card over. Call the PO, Secretary, everyone from the old and new hall... Just be a pain in the a** about it and they will just want to get you off there backs...

  • Hope4Others
    Hope4Others

    Do they not just forward the card to the next cong?

    Just don't answer the phone when they call, thats what caller ID is for.

    Best of luck with your fade

    Hope4Others

  • senora
    senora

    I like that Cognac, I think I'll get in touch with them and say that I can't get on the school, nor turn in my time nor get magazines and they will have to send it.

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    Do call them. Tell them you need the card sent soon due to what you stated above. If they don't send it in a week, tell them you will have to contact the CO to tell him to take the card to the other hall. That'll get them in gear.

    Better make it look good for a short time after - attend all the Sunday meetings for a month or so. The spies might be in touch for a while to make sure you are doing well spiritually with the move. Then start the 'fade' in earnest.

    Jeff

  • AudeSapere
    AudeSapere

    I could be wrong, but I thought that the secretary from the new hall was supposed to request the cards from the old hall.

    Have you asked the elders at the new hall to get your card??

    Also, I've heard others here use another little trick... Give the new congregation a wrong address and wrong phone number. (Transpose a couple of the numbers). That way they will have trouble finding you. OOOPS!!

    -Aude.

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