Cute e-mail I received....

by babygirl75 4 Replies latest jw friends

  • babygirl75
    babygirl75

    I'm going to try to implement these.... Dear Employees:

    It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their co-workers.

    Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.

    We do, however, realize the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with co-workers.

    Therefore, a list of 18 New and Innovative 'TRY SAYING' phrases have been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner.

    Number 1
    TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training.
    INSTEAD OF: You don't know what the f___ you're doing.

    Number 2
    TRY SAYING: She's an aggressive go-getter.
    INSTEAD OF: She's a f___ing bit__.

    Number 3
    TRY SAYING: Perhaps I can work late.
    INSTEAD OF: And when the f___ do you expect me to do this?

    Number 4
    TRY SAYING: I'm certain that isn't feasible.
    INSTEAD OF: No f___ing way.

    Number 5
    TRY SAYING: Really?
    INSTEAD OF: You've got to be sh___ing me!

    Number 6
    TRY SAYING: Perhaps you should check with...
    INSTEAD OF: Tell someone who gives a sh__.

    Number 7
    TRY SAYING: I wasn't involved in the project.
    INSTEAD OF: It's not my f___in g problem.

    Number 8
    TRY SAYING: That's interesting.
    INSTEAD OF: What the f___?

    Number 9
    TRY SAYING: I'm not sure this can be implemented.
    INSTEAD OF: This sh__ won't work.

    Number 10
    TRY SAYING: I'll try to schedule that.
    INSTEAD OF: Why the f___ didn't you tell me sooner?

    Number 11
    TRY SAYING: He's not familiar with the issues.
    INSTEAD OF: He's got his head up his a__.

    Number 12
    TRY SAYING: Excuse me, sir?
    INSTEAD OF: Eat sh__ and die.

    Number 13
    TRY SAYING: So you weren't happy with it?
    INSTEAD OF: Kiss my a__.

    Number 14
    TRY SAYING: I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.
    INSTEAD OF: F__ it, I'm on salary.

    Number 15
    TRY SAYING: I don't think you understand.
    INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your a__.

    Number 16
    TRY SAYING: I love a challenge.
    INSTEAD OF: This f___ing job sucks.

    Number 17
    TRY S AYING: You want me to take care of that?
    INSTEAD OF: Who the f___ died and made you boss?

    Number 18
    TRY SAYING: He's somewhat insensitive.
    INSTEAD OF: He's a pr_ck.

    Thank You,
    Human Resources

  • outofthebox
    outofthebox

    euphemisms.

  • BlackSwan of Memphis
    BlackSwan of Memphis

    LMFAO

    SO you mean I'm NOT supposed to say the "instead of's" ohhhhhhh

    But I thought it was ok to call the stupid b------ a stupid b--------- when she f------------ screwed up $400 worth of shirts.

    Heh heh heh ok, well. I'll try the "Try Saying..." and let you know how that works.

    I reaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaally

    realllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllly

    needed this today.

  • Tara
    Tara

    LOL. Very cute!

  • kitten whiskers
    kitten whiskers

    I love this! I emailed it to my hubby at work! Thanks!

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