Deer Dyari,
i c'ant beleef de nurve ov dose opostates! Gonig orn abowt de YN tihng lyke tits sumho cigarificant! Evun wen are bettuz hat Brothel av cum fourwad nad xplaned dat tits wuz hin oarda uze de YN liebraseria dat Bruther Bari philled owt de happlicayshun. has dough uznig da liebrarie iz lyke suleaping wit da fillti Babbylowkneeun haw! dese opostates ave two mugde thyme hon der ands; dey shudbee hattending Kristun meatins hat de Kingdum all agen, nad reednig Kristian pubications pot owt buy de Fayful nad Excreet Slayve sow has two bee kaypabbel ov rite tinkin agen. Insdead, dey ave hall dis tyme hon dare ands two tri nad dyg hup dirts hon de SowSihitty. dat dey kepe fyndin sow mudge iz knot han tissue, ov cors! Hin ha feeled sow furtile has de What Drivel? Buy Bullshit nad Crap SowSihitty, dere's bowned two bee sum munyour...
dat halph gie his rahder straynge. hi lyke de umor, butt im karfull two kepe mi catz, mR Jinks nad Old Smelly, haway phrom de monytoh wen e's hon; hi doen't onet two fryten dem two mudge!
dis evernink hi wuz abel two bee ov survis two Geover's peepull hin da byg wae! Elda Nimrod Hunt nad is wyfe wur giong owt, sow dey hasked mi two shapparown four dare sun nad is gurlfrend, huhew wuz ova four de evernink. Afta gettink ome phrom de sewidge pulant, hi show-wood thurr-a-ly nad goat drest hin cleen cloythus nad ewesed lotz ov Theodorant has dey ad wrequested (dey weere verry phirm abowt dat - hi wunda wy...) hi warked de myle aw sow two elda Hunt's hows hin orda two tayke hon dis grate priverlidge hin Geover's survis; hobviusly tits wus two mudge trubbel two pyk mi hup, aw elda Hunter wood ave dun sow. Elda Hunt grunnted ellow nad gudby butt didunt pae mudge moore hattenshun two mi (e hobviussley as mudge hon is mined, beeing charrjud wid de wrespunsibillity ov gardin Gohod's fulock), showood mi ha pyle ov Kristian publicayshuns dat i wuz welcum two reed, nad e nad is wyf leffed. Elda Hunt's sun, Mike nad is gurlfrend, elda Noah Tall's dawter, Dana, satt wid mi four ha phew minits wile wee chattud abowt geovah's service, has ewe shud hin sutch ha sithewashun. dey layta xskewsed demselves nad towed mi dey ad sum chaws two du hin elda Hunt's bedrume. hi herd sum creekin noysez cummin phrom de bedrume nad cald owt, haskin whot waz goin hon. dey cald bak dat dey weer ficksin debed, bean bowfe andi wid tulz! Afta ha phew moore minits, hi herd dem bowf yellink hallot. Agen hi hasked wot wus appenin, nad dey sed dat dey'd bangud dare finguz wid ha amma. hi fought dat dat wus rader straing dat dey'd bowf bangud dare finguz hat de eggsakly de saym tym, butt hi surppowse tit's possybull. Sum minits layta dey caym dowen, loockin rader dishovelled nad swetty, butt verrie appy. hit muts bee ha gud pheeling two elp owt Mim nad Da hin dat wae! Elda Hunt caym ome hat abowt 9:00mp nad hasked iv everytink ad bean oarrite nad abuv bored. hi asshured im dat dere wus kno wae dat hanythink untowarred cud ave appened sow urly hin de hevening. e seamud two haccept dat anser, gruntyd is fanks nad dismist mi sow hi cud wark ohm agen.
Whell Diearry, tit's bean halong dae nad hi'm two tyred two heven luk hat mi genniffa Lopus pickture twonyt! dere cums Mim wid de cocoe, sow, Gud knight!
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