What just happened?

DanTheMan

I really hesitated to post this because it's pretty personal but I'm so confused by a recent situation that I just wanna talk about it and get some feedback as to where I might have gone wrong, if anywhere.

My mom and stepdad were dining at a local restaurant two or three months ago, and the server who waited on them happened to be a girl that I went to school with from kindergarten all the way thru high school. Also, my mom had been friends with her mom. I never actually knew this girl very well at all, and I hadn't seen her or talked to her or even thought about her at all since high school.

Well, anyways, she wrote down her web address (she's an artist now and has a website with pictures of her paintings) and gave it to my mom, and told her that she'd like to hear from me, which my mom passed along. So, I went to her website, perused a little, got her contact info, and wrote her, telling her that I enjoyed her art, and telling her little of what I've done since school (I didn't mention the JWism part! lol!). And then I waited. And waited. Finally after a month or so she wrote back, but it was like, 'Hey, i'm not ignoring you, just very busy, i'll write soon'. Then a few more weeks passed, and she wrote again, but again it was next to nothing, just 'hi how ya been. it's cold here. talk to ya later'. :S So I wrote her back in sorta the same manner, keeping it really light. Two days later she sent me a Facebook invite.

So I went on Facebook, created a page for myself, put a picture up, linked to her and to a few other friends that I found on there. She posted on my wall that she was glad to see me on there, and that I look 'damn cute' in my picture, and there were a couple of other light exchanges like that. So I emailed her telling her that I think she looks damn pretty, and I asked her if she'd like to meet me for coffee sometime. She responded quickly with 'sure, but after the holidays'.

And then two days later I go on my page and she has disappeared from my friends list, her posts on my wall are gone, and I can't find her on the site...in other words she apparently decided to block me.

What just happened? The nagging inner voice of self-doubt that is almost always at least a whisper and occasionally ratchets up to concert-level volume is having a lot of fun with this one.

BlackSwan of Memphis

Here's the thing, you haven't talked to her in ages. Doesnt' sound like you did anything.
So my best guess is there could be way more going on in her life. A boyfriend that's jealous, her own self doubt, anything.
If you still have her email, send her an email.

Tell her that you were happy that you had the chance to say hi, you noticed the facebook thing and hope that if there were anything you did to piss her off, that she would talk to you.
Wish her well and try not to think about it.

MissingLink

Maybe she just got sick of facebook and closed her account. One of my friends did this, and they just disappeared.

Email or ring her!

DanTheMan

If you still have her email, send her an email.
Tell her that you were happy that you had the chance to say hi, you noticed the facebook thing and hope that if there were anything you did to piss her off, that she would talk to you.
Wish her well and try not to think about it.

Solid advice, just what i was looking for, thanks!

BlackSwan of Memphis

No problem Dan

Stuff just happens ya know?

good luck

Robdar

I agree with what Black Swan said. Sometimes these sort of things happen and there is no secret meaning behind them.

Satanus

Could be like they said. Or, it could be that she gave you a chance to see if you were interested in something more, other than doing the friends thing. You didn't do anything, so, she lost interest. Just a guess. Try sending her a cocky, challenging email, and see how she responds. All you can do is lose.

S

DanTheMan

Here's what I wrote:

Hi ___,

Either you've closed your facebook account or you've blocked me, not sure which but if the latter is the case, I hope I didn't say something that angered or offended you in some way.

I hope things go well for you and it was nice hearing from you.

Dan

DanTheMan

Oh wow...she responded...BIG misunderstanding...OOPS...excuse me while I go kick my own ass for being so stupidly narcissistic about this.

BlackSwan of Memphis

I don't think you should feel stupid, that kind of misunderstanding happens all the time.

I hope that things continue to go well with you two....

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