This is what we really want you to do. Join our shiny happy religion. Resign from that well paying job you have and get out round the doors. Don’t get married that way you’ll have more time to work for us. Do not have any children, but if you really have to, make sure they do not play with anyone not a jdub, and they aint playing with our kids either, and you’ll get into trouble if they aint quiet at the kingdub hall. Stop being friendly with anyone not a Jdub, but always smile at them. Bolt your windows shut because when you are out round the doors someone may break in to check if your house is tidy!! Talk about people behind their backs, because they aint as "holey" as you are. Stop any hobbies you have and get out round the doors. Stop listening to music not by Jdubs, in fact don’t enjoy yourself at all unless we say it’s ok, and whatever you do, do not dance at a large social gathering. Do what we say, not what we do because we are Jehovah’s police and will prosecute you if you don’t “spiritually speaking of course.” Tell everyone jdubs all obey “Caesar’s rules” (but break all his speed limits in secret and don’t let anyone know how fast you really drive). Pretend you have love among yourselves, smile at everyone in the kingdub hall, but do not get to know them, because they might be bad associates. Tell all your family that if they do not become jdubs as well, then they will die, so you may as well stop talking to them now since they will soon be destroyed. Do not study the bible with small groups of your friends unless you ask our permission first, and then we’ll tell you, you aint allowed to. And most importantly Leave us all your money in your will. AND......Do not ever leave us or we’ll disfellowship you and try our best to destroy the remaining years you have!! Then we’ll tell all your jdub associates to ignore you or we’ll threaten them with disfellowshipping also. We will also hound you if you leave until you contemplate suicide. AND While we are on the subject go out and get more people to do all this as well, tell them we are the true religion and religion is a snare and a racket
This is what JWs really want you to do.
by martinwellborne 2 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
-
-
darth frosty
In a nut shell...your right. Jehovah doesn't ask for much.
-
WTWizard
To add to the list, they don't want you to sleep unless you have their permission, and then only for a couple of hours a day. Get up at 4:30 in the morning every damn day, get the family (oops, you are not supposed to have one but if you already made that sin...) ready for field circus. Show up at the Kingdumb Hell at 5:30 in the morning for street work. Then get out in street work quickly and stay until just before 9:00 AM. Screech back to the Kingdumb Hell and regroup for door to door work, which is to last all day (including not at homes, calls, and studies).
Then, after you are exhausted from all this, screech to the Kingdumb Hell for the boasting sessions (if it's not a meeting night, regroup at 6:00 PM). Of course, any children you were dumb enough to have will have to report to the Kingdumb Hell every school afternoon at 3:00 PM). On nights with a boasting session, you have to take your children so they can be tired in school the next day. Then, after it gets too late for door to door or after the boasting session, they want you to waste the whole evening writing letters (it will cost you for the stamp, but that's your problem) until after midnight. Remember, you have to get up the next morning and do it all again.
Yes, they expect you to look refreshed all the while. But no coffee! Those coffee breaks are stealing time away from field circus. Wouldn't it be a shame if someone had to die because they were not reached with the message because YOU were on a coffee break?