Not sure what to think...

by Nosferatu 9 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse

  • Nosferatu
    Nosferatu

    As many of you know, I have a stalker - a guy stalker. He's been stalking me for almost five years now since I ended our friendship (which lasted 19 years).

    The fact that the guy seems completely obsessed about me weirds me out a little bit. However, it doesn't disgust me. The fact that he enjoys pursuing women under the age of 18 disgusts me. He has a fast food job which allows him to interact with under age girls on a daily basis (he's 28 years old). He has taken the virginity of a few of these girls.

    But here's where it gets down right scary. He procreated and has a little boy. These are two of his blog entries, and it frightens me to read them knowing what I know:

    Yesterday as I laid with you in bed, for the first time you moved in the right spot where I was not just holding you with one arm but was able to completely cuddle you. Almost instantly i began to cry. Yes i can admit this. My eyes were leaking as i thought about you as my son. I don't think words can describe how i really feel about you. Love is not a strong enough word. My bond with you is unbreakable, unbendable, external, and forever. As i lay there with you i was thinking how i have enjoyed experiencing things in life for a second time because i get to see them through your eyes. I think about how no amount of money would ever be enough for someone to take you away, you are priceless. A million dollars and the ability to go and do whatever i want would not be life, if i could not share any of it with you. Know that i will never be to busy to spend 5 minutes with you. I will never be too tired to listen or too angry to love you. You are by far the most easiest thing to love in this world. You are a joy in my life. You will never be a burden, you will never be a regret, you will never be a mistake, you will never be alone. I would give my life to save yours, my only selfish regret being i would not be with you anymore. I was born again when you came into my life, and love at first sight does exist, i i believed that the first moment i saw you. Your innocents, and smile, is just one of the many things that are right in the world. I may not be able to show you all the things in the world, I only hope you grow up knowing that you were loved. I hope i can raise you into a man that will make the world proud. I'll be there for those mistakes, and when you fall down, even if it is again and again, i'll always be there to pick you up. I will love you with all that is me. You are the most precious thing i ever could call my own, and i will always be proud to call you my son.

    Today you turn 2. I can't believe how big you have become. From being a little guy who fit perfectly in my arms onto my shoulders, you are now an individual who i can't seem to get to sit still for 5 minutes let alone hold you longer than one. I treasure the days i can have you fall asleep in my arms while rocking you. You amaze me still every day with the things you discover, the trouble you get in, the amazement in your eyes, and the looks you give me, your scary face being one. Though i wonder about those raised eyebrows you've been giving me lately....it's so hard to stay mad at you...your so darn cute. Even now as i type this, there you are trying to sit on my lap. Your dancing is priceless, your attempts at independence are fun to watch. Sometimes though [name], can i please have my phone back?? I can sit and watch you all day in the little things you do. Though i cannot see you every day like i wished i could, i take in all i can in the days we do get to share together. Destroy the bathroom and leave your letters all over the floor and your drawings on the tile. But can you try not and hog alll the bed? :) It's never been frustrating, you've been a joy since day 1. If its a second birthday...or a 25th, i will always see the 6 lb 2 oz baby i seen for the first time on January 11th 2oo5. Love you more than you will ever know - Daddy.
  • JWdaughter
    JWdaughter

    The first was a little intense! The second was pretty normal. . .I'm glad he is still in love with that little guy. 2 year olds are a challenge! Just wait!

    Has your stalker calmed down any with you now that he has a new distraction? Are you having fun with your new son? Hope all is well with you and yours.

  • Nosferatu
    Nosferatu

    He's still doing stupid shit to me, but it's not as aggressive as it was. I hope one day it will eventually go away completely.

    And yes, I'm having lots of fun with the boy! However, the type of "love" I feel for him is pretty much the same as the love I feel for my brother - blood related buddies. I honestly could NOT say that I'm "in love" with him. That goes to my wife.

    Maybe it's just me, but maybe it's not. Knowing what he's like though, I'm scared for that little boy of his. If my stalker isn't a pedophile, he's going to control his son with blackmail.

  • ButtLight
    ButtLight

    Either his is an extremely affectionate person, or is just plain wierd. Either way, I find it weird!

  • sunshineToo
    sunshineToo

    He loves his boy so much. I can understand how he feels. My little one is just a little bit over 2. I guess all 2-year olds act the same. I hope he (dad) settles down. The little boy needs a stable warm household. I hope he doesn't mess up the little boy whom he loves so much.

  • bikerchic
    bikerchic
    If my stalker isn't a pedophile, he's going to control his son with blackmail.

    I read his blog and I didn't get the thought not even one little bit that he is a pedophile. He is simply a father who loves his son and has chosen a blog to write it down. He most likely doesn't say those things to his son, most fathers don't which imho is a shame boys need to be told by their parents (both of them) they are loved and often. Fathers tend to show their love rather than verbalize it and they show it in manly way like providing for them things when a simple word or time spent together would do wonders for their sons.

    As many of you know, I have a stalker - a guy stalker. He's been stalking me for almost five years now since I ended our friendship (which lasted 19 years).

    The fact that the guy seems completely obsessed about me weirds me out a little bit.

    Nos be careful that you aren't just being the flip side of him. The fact that you've brought this subject up here more than once leads me to think you are just as obsessed about him as he is you. I think it's really over the top to start labeling anyone a pedophile, obviously his way of expressing himself to his son isn't yours. I say that because of this comment I read of yours a couple of days ago, it took me aback:

    There's only one person I say "I love you" to, and that's my wife. I don't want to hear those words from most other people, be it an Elder (yes, that actually happened), my parents, nor my best friend. However, if my best friend told me he loved me, I'd probably laugh and tell him to fvvv off with a half smile on my face.

    It also feels wrong coming from my parents. I could care less about them.

    Not sure about my boy. I might not say it back to him, but I'd let him know the feelings are mutual. If I had a daughter, I'd probably tell it to her.

    Remember, it's okay to not say those words if the other person already knows.

    I hope you can learn to say I love you to your children, sons or daughters it very vital that children know they are loved and told it daily. I'm not saying this to be mean to you but out of care and concern for you.

    I wish my parents would have been more expressive with me and my siblings, it would have helped me immensely to over come the feelings of not being loved or lovable something I still to this day struggle with.

    Hugs!

  • valkyrie
    valkyrie

    I thought those two blog entries expressed beautifully some perfectly normal emotions: love, wonder, awe, appreciation for the preciousness of a first child, and realization that a life which HE has participated in bringing into the world posesses individuality. Very touching, indeed!

    I think that the almost overwhelming depth of his sentiment and attachment to the child is all the more understandable if the man has never succeeded in building a true trust and love bond with his adult partner (the child's mother or another paramour?). This may be the first time that he has had the experience of truly selfless and unconditional love (both giving and receiving). I hope that he - as a father - can maintain that realisation of preciousness as his son grows and manifests greater individuality and independence; his love can then be enhanced with respect.

  • lonelysheep
    lonelysheep

    The way he talked about what the boy does as for taking up room in the bed and "the bathroom tiles"--wtf is that for?? There are better things to type about his two year old son. Maybe that's just me.

    Are you worried about physical and mental abuse, Nos? That is what came to my mind.

  • Nosferatu
    Nosferatu
    Are you worried about physical and mental abuse, Nos?

    His whole family is fvvved in the head. I've sat with him and his brother at a table while they were plotting revenge against one of their sisters. His other sister has worked as an escort, worked in a strip club, and posed nude on the internet. Him, his brothers, and his sister have all at one time or another joined together to play "pranks" on me. His sister apparently has followed me around while I've been out driving. Two of his brothers claim to have the ability to talk to the dead.

    Nos be careful that you aren't just being the flip side of him.

    I've made it a point to keep my eyes open until he's left me alone for at least a couple of years. Unfortunately, the counter has been set back to zero again. I've been trying to remain two steps ahead of him in preparation of his next move. I'd love for him to leave me the hell alone! Cutting him out of my life didn't work, being his friend doesn't work. I could care less what he does with his life. I tried just moving on without keeping an eye on him, but then he popped back into my life and tried to destroy my marriage. I don't need shit like that happening again, and I feel like I have no choice but to keep an eye on what the hell he's doing.

    In a sad sort of way, I hope he gets caught having sex with a minor and goes to jail. It would give me peace of mind. Hell, I wish he'd do something to me illegally so I could get him thrown in the slammer.

    He's constantly using other people close to me to "get back" at me, be it my wife, my friends, or even my parents. He tried approaching one of my friends, but my friend pretended not to know him.

    I don't know what I can do since he's not directly contacting me, but contacting the people around me. As of late, he found my myspace music page, and has "made friends" with people on my friends list.

    This shit is never ending. You think he'd get over it after five years. I know I would. I would love for it all to end so I could just move on with my life, and not have to worry about his next move.

  • hemp lover
    hemp lover

    I agree with bikerchic and valkyrie. Those are two beautiful letters from a father to son.

    "Remember, it's okay to not say those words if the other person already knows."

    If this is what you really believe, then it's no wonder you didn't understand your "stalker's" blog.

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit