So...

by cyd0099 9 Replies latest social relationships

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  cyd0099

  Take two of my once-failed relationship ended tonight. Rather than feel anything, I have chiosen to drink.
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  bikerchic

  Ummm sorry (((((cyd))))).

  Sounds like you gave it a good shot though so don't be so down on yourself. I know too well how it hurts but you'll find no solace in the bottom of a bottle, yeah it fine once or twice but I hope you come around to facing life straight on and getting on with it. Life is too short to waist on booze or cheap women, or is that cheap booze and women? Awe heck, you'll feel better in the morning.
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  cyd0099

  It's the morning and I do not feel so good.
  
  I just did not feel like going to bed feeling sorry for myself. The ending was for the best but it tends to reenforce the things I do not like about myself and it was not the time to deal with those feelings last night.
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  wanderlustguy

  Just my 2 cents with no judgement...take some time and get your mind clear, I'd reccomment NO ALCOHOL or any other depressants. It may take a week or so for you to feel the effects mentally, but it helped me back in the day.

  Good luck.
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  cyd0099

  Thanks, WLG. Tonight's Ouzo-fest was a fully understood band-aid on my crushed little heart, not a curative or an answer.
  
  The whole thing just slowly crumbled, we just lost what we had and we really both knew it, honestly, I had been feeling like calling it quits for about a month but I was hoping it might turn around.
  
  But because my relationships tend to end like this, I always end up feeling as dull as dishwater and unable to sustain a woman's interest...
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  Nosferatu

  I had to learn how to put a positive spin on the ending of relationships, or I'd end up taking longer than needed to get over it.

  True, it is the closing of a chapter of your life, and it may have been a particularly upsetting closing, but what lies ahead is the beginning of a new chapter. The interesting thing about this new chapter is the pages are blank. Being in a relationship basically wrote the last chapter for you, but this chapter is all yours to write! You can do anything you like with it.

  This is a great time to pick up those hobbies that you abandoned when you got into a relationship. Your hobbies and interests never get tired of you, nor will they hold a grudge against you for putting them down for so long.

  This is also a great time to do some personal change. Go out and get some new clothes, a new hairstyle, piercing, just anything that gives you a sense of moving onto a new path of life. The best part of it all is that you don't have to get anybody's approval for a "new look" you've been wanting to try out.

  The ending of a relationship isn't all bad. There's a lot of good that can come out of it. Over time, the feelings will seperate themselves from the memories. You'll be left with the memories of her, but you won't feel that strong emotion anymore. That's when you know that you've completely moved on.

  Good luck on your new path of life!
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  wanderlustguy

  But because my relationships tend to end like this, I always end up feeling as dull as dishwater and unable to sustain a woman's interest...

  All relationships end until you find the one that is good for you.

  It's not YOU that was the problem, it was the two of you together. Like trying to put a round peg in a square hole, even though at first it looks like it might fit. Maybe it's a good time to assess what you want, and compare that to what you had. If you were thinking it was a bad deal for a month before, there was something to that.

  Don't short sell yourself. There's not neccessarily anything wrong with you.

  Good luck.

  WLG
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  mouthy

  Awe heck, you'll feel better in the morning

  I KNEW you wouldnt !!! How can you when your gonna wake up with a BIG HEAD!!! But my love there are bigger fish in the pond so keep looking without the booze.... (((((HUGS)))
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  purplesofa

  Hey,

  Just wondering how things are for you after a few days to think about stuff. After a breakup, when I can manage to stop hurting and feeling like a loser.........I fineally can tell myself there must be someone better for me and the next relationship is better.

  I never understood how some people find someone relatively early and easy in life and others do not. But I do know we all deserve a loving, lasting relationship if that is what we want.

  Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus........I read it and some of the info is helpful from it.

  purps
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  codeblue

  After my 20 marriage ended in divorce (because my ex cheated for 18 years of it) I decided what "purps" said.

  The relationship was not healthy for me and I deserved better. He was NOT the right person for me and failed miserably to show he loved me by cheating continuously.

  Hang in there..(sorry for the pain that hurts like hell right now)..when you aren't looking you will find the right person or they will find you.

  Codeblue