Well, I just wrote another one of many letters to my sister and father who are still jw's and who have refused any contact with me as any 'good jw' does. I have seen other's letters from others and I have enjoyed them. So, for curiosity sake, I am submitting my letter for others to read. I am interested in your critique and suggestions for the next time I write a letter into the thin air. Regardless if it gets a response I find the letters therapeutic. Maybe ONE day I will reach through to them, doubt it though.
Thank you for your time.
Here it is:
Dear Stacey and Dad, I write this letter for several reasons. I enjoy writing my feelings. I feel that it is important to reach you. I would like you to know that my life has forever changed. I'm sure you can appreciate that. It is not a life course that I would have chosen deliberately. It is one in which I feel that life has opened up to me in a way I never expected. The things I have learned on my journey are things I imagine you will never understand. They are too many and varied and in a place few have gone. I am so grateful to have experienced them. They have forever changed me and built in me the man I always wanted to be. As I write that, I sense that you feel that I must have always wanted to be 'worldly' (which just means not a Jehovah's Witness.) It actually means that I have become WHOLE in my journey and in the process and fire of tragedy, I have become a man. No longer do I feel like a victim. I am the one in control of my life. My life is no longer adversely affected by the actions and lack of proper action of others around me. (ex. my Father, the elders) That in itself is very freeing and life giving. I have never been happier in my life despite the tragedies that have occurred. To be able to have affected people in a more positive way would have been nice, but it never could have occurred. I wish that I could share with you all that I have learned and experienced. That too is impossible as there are no words to fully explain all that has happened to me. I have come into my own and it is a wonderful experience. I hope that things will continue that way. I am very excited to see the future! I am thrilled! So, that leads to my second point in writing. I understand the law you are under. I understand the judgment that comes to you for writing me. I understand that it is out of your hands. I understand the heavy hand that is upon you that convinces you that it is 'loving' and 'proper' NOT to talk to a family member who doesn't believe in your interpretation of the Bible. I write out of concern for YOU. I know where I am and what I have. There is no doubt in my mind. I am FREE! I am CONVICTED! I live in a world of love and grace! Your silence will in no way 'help' me to 'see' the 'truth' or 'repent'. If you ever wanted to 'help' me, only WORDS could ever attempt such a feat. My life will continue happily. From my perspective, it is as if I am already in Paradise. I feel VERY connected with my Creator and feel loved and guided by Him. I have JOY. When I reflect upon what I have been given and the relationship I have with the Creator I get OVERJOYED! Your silence cannot affect that Joy that I feel and experience. Your silence will not bring me back to being a Jehovah's Witness. Summary: I have found something that I didn't know I was missing - the holy spirit and God! I could never go back to being a Jehovah's Witness after experiencing all that I have experienced. Once you feel grace and love, joy and the holy spirit, there is no going back. It just is what it is. I cannot deny it. I must follow it. It is not a cult. It is not judgmental. It is not worldly. It is not divisive. It is LOVE. It is acceptance. It is genuine. It is sincere. It is real. It is the work of the spirit! So, with all that said, where do you and I stand? I am a Christian. I am moved by love. I follow the leadings of the holy spirit. The only thing standing between us is the Watchtower Society. It is not God. I challenge you to read through the Christian Greek Scriptures and justify your course of conduct. Pray about it and see if is a God thing or a man thing. I think you will see that it is a man thing. A man thing means that you are a slave to man and not God. Therefore, you have been led astray by wolves in sheeps clothing and fallen victim to one of Satan's Great Snares - DECEPTION. Ask yourself, "What would Jesus want me to do in this situation?" Even if you believe that I am misguided, wouldn't your worship and belief demand that you assist me in my wrong path? Wouldn't LOVE insist on HELPING a 'lost' one? (as I'm sure that is your perception.) Here I am. Open. Honest. Sincere. Without judgment. Just a man. I come to you with a belief that has sprouted good fruits! If you read the proofs of the holy spirit and what it's fruit is I feel that it explains what has happened to me. So, I recommend my path. If you see a misstep, tell me. Show it to me from the Bible. I will show you from the Bible where I feel you have been led astray. We should be willing to disagree. I'm sure it will always remain that way. What a WONDERFUL day it would be if you were ever able to see what I have seen. It is very simple! It has ASTONISHING effects when believed! It is unbelievable and unexplainable. I am no longer the person I used to be. I have been changed! I LOVE the change!!! I don't even have to discuss religion with you. I can keep my joy and happiness from you. It is hard as you can see, but I can try! I just think that communication between family members is a good and positive thing for all involved. Our family is fragmented enough to fragment it even further. If you feel you must disown me, then that is your decision to live with in front of your Creator. As for me, I must follow the path of love and seek peace and unity with my family. As I see things, my family has fallen victim to a cult mentality and man driven organization who does not have God as it's center. I feel you have been robbed of your individuality and joy and you have been kept from such an AWESOME relationship with a God who LOVES you and is ready to BLESS you when you COME to Him!!! Seeing your spiritual condition from afar is so sad to me. I long for you to be freed from your enslavement to man and for you to experience love and joy from Christ! But until that day, I am just here to welcome you to opening a dialogue with me. To re-establish connections with your family, your brother, your son. Only dictators keep family members from one another. Only those filled with hate keep one from another. There is no way to define love as, "I will love you IF...(you come back)" That sentiment has NOTHING to do with love. It is based on selfishness. It reflects the spirit of a cult. It is based on fear. It is an isolationists attitude. It doesn't reflect confidence in the truth, but a fear of losing power over members of the church. I could prove to you that my path is correct in SO many ways. Once you are out of the mess, things become SO apparent! But that is neither here nor there. I am here to recommend myself to you. I am here to re-establish family bonds. I am here to reflect the spirit of LOVE. I am offering my friendship to you to make YOUR sense of family close and connected and happy. As I have tried to explain before, I do not come to you out of weakness. I come to you out of strength. I consider the Society and it's rule by fear and intimidation as refuse!! I am so grateful to be released from it's bondage! Yet, I do not reject God. My relationship is closer than it ever has been and He has confirmed to me that my path is correct. I didn't pray that out of arrogance. I prayed it to Him in DISBELIEF that my beliefs could be wrong. I BEGGED Him to make me know what way to go. I told Him that by me choosing this path, I was going against Him in my previous beliefs. I said, If I go this way, I could be turning away from Him. I BEGGED Him to make it clear to me which way to go and He DID!!! I am addressing you because I feel it is Godly to keep family ties close and loving. So I must pursue it. If you reject it, that is your choice. I will ALWAYS be here! I will not turn from YOU, yet YOU will turn from ME. What is the TRUE course of LOVE?!!! I think it is obvious. I do not seek a relationship with you because of your silent treatment. I am in no way intimidated by your isolation or cultish mentality. I come to you because it is the right thing to do. It is, in my opinion, the godly path. I think YOU are hurting by your actions. I feel that you would be benefitted by communication. I feel that it hurts the human spirit to do something that is against human nature to do. I suppose you could wait for the Watchtower Society to change it's mind again and LET you talk to your brother and son again some day. But where will YOU be when that day comes? I feel you will have lost MUCH through your actions and you will only have the Society to blame along with your blind allegiance. So, that is my desire. To establish communication in any form you choose. Email, letters, mail, visits, phone, whatever. It is up to you. Till then, I will be here in Washington. Heart filled with JOY and Happiness and Love! I LOVE my new life! My heart is sad for you. I do not see you as happy or joyful. I do not see your conduct as motivated by the holy spirit. It is my desire that you have God's acceptance and approval, but from what I have learned and see it is my fear that you have been led away from the God who loves you which is Satan's desire. Here waiting for you with love and open arms, Ethan