Seeking closure regarding the truth

by The wanderer 5 Replies latest jw friends

  • The wanderer
    The wanderer
    First Things First

    To all of those individuals that left a comment on my last
    thread "Questions for those born or raised in the truth" there
    can be nothing short of a big thank you. The comments were
    interesting. They could easily be categorized as between
    good and excellent with one or two as drawing inspiration.

    Exiting from the organization

    Now, that we have left the organization it raises a question
    in my mind about coping. For those of you who have "lost"
    family members because of your stand how did you adjust
    to the loss? Or, did you?

    On seeking closure

    I left the organization after fourteen years with no family ties
    and up until now I have not permanently put this behind me,
    otherwise, Why would I be here? I disfellowshiped the Watch
    tower Society but there is still residue lingering. Any suggest-
    ions on nailing this coffin shut?

    Thank you, once again.


    The Wanderer

  • Star Moore
    Star Moore

    Wand... Why do you think you are still hanging on? Is it because you still feel there are many truths in it..? And that maybe God is still with them in some way? Or maybe for some reason you made a mistake leaving? Truth is, they are life ruiners and a major cult. But I do think Russell had God's least in the beginning.. However, I could be wrong about that.. Just keep reading the comments on this board and eventually the holy spirit will set you free... Love, Star

  • hambeak

    It takes many years for closure if any at least for me. You have a thing inside you that loves family and friends. When you are raised to believe that the only ones you may associat with are in the org. You become very limited with social interaction. If you leave you are shunned and it hurts like hell. You must go on and develope new extended family and friends and consider them gone or it will absolutely tear you up mentally and you may turn to things to escape like alcohol or drugs or whatever keep your sanity as the org has over 100 years of experience of mind manipulation.

  • thecarpenter

    I posted this in another post

    That's remarkable. I was wondering about that, ex-jw's seem to carry the burden of the mind control in the lives for a while. I sometimes think that is because some of what they were taught still resonates with them. (I can see this in myself at times and have to reinterpret the trigger situation in my mind) I can see that the same phenomenon also exists with other Christian control groups. This would be a interesting psychological study.

    The other control groups that likewise felt this was was the Huttite, Mennonite, and so on. I know during times of disaster, many people flock back to the church they abandon out of fear and familarity. Personally, I look at the witnesses as just another bible group with some good things and bad things. I still haven't investigated other religions yet, but I will coming this summer 07'.

  • grey matters
    grey matters

    I posted this in another thread:

    What has helped me is to be close to non JW family - aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. I come from a big family. The members that are JW are significant to me, but they are not the majority of the family. I try to remember that to keep things in perspective.

    As far as closure is concerned, the more I study and realize that a lot of the doctrines were wrong and the dates were a bad guess, the better I feel about being out. I've done well in business. A lot of my friends don't know I was ever a dub to begin with. It is difficult to be entirely at peace with it. But I have learned from it, and am trying to have a balanced perspective.

  • talley

    What 'nailed this coffin shut' for me was reading Ray Franz's book "Crisis of Conscience".
    And that was after several years of being inactive; it eraced any doubts I might have had that the troof was really not the truth. That is when I began sening Christmas Cards and going to Memorial Day celebrations, and appreciating the fine people around me sharing their joys and sorrows, and at long last enjoying every day wholeheartedly for that day.

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