How Would A "Good" JW View Any One Of Us Here?

by minimus 7 Replies latest jw friends

  • minimus

    If a good standing Witness ever knew we even MIGHT frequent this type of board or that we COULD be negative against the "Truth", how would they react toward us??---------How are JWs supposed to act toward those of us who have left but are not officially judicially removed from the congregation???

  • jambon1

    To your last question - I dont think there is an official stance to take but you can bet your arse that if you started spouting 'contrary talk' or just said how you really feel, it would get around the circuit like wildfire and you would eventually be avoided.

    I have confided in 2 individuals about why I have left - my doubts and dilemas. They are still really nice to me but keep a safe distance. One of them agrees with me so I suppose he does`nt want to hear it if he is still living the JW life.

  • serendipity

    If the JW who was posting was an apolgist and an elder or maybe a MS, they might get away with it. However, if he were a poster, posting negative stuff, then he would be called to the back room so quick his head would spin.

    If someone was a lurker they'd get warned and maybe marked, depending on their reputation in the cong.

  • minimus

    I think that many Witnesses try to stay away from "inactive" ones----just in case.

  • mama1119

    I am DF'd but my Mom and Dad have unofficially left the truth and they are shunned just like I am, except every couple of months when they get a knock knock...My Dad refuses to be shunned so if he sees someone do it he will go out of his way to be extra friendly, ask all about them, and my favorite part is when I am with him and he says, "You remember my daughter Rachel" and they dont know what to say or where to look...priceless

  • AuldSoul

    I agree with your assessment about inactive ones, minimus. I have seen so many shut OUT of the congregation until they eventually develop friendships outside. It is 100% opposed to what the Bible says Christians would do.

    And before someone like Grissom jumps in to say we should focus on what they teach instead of what some do...

    *** w80 5/1 p. 15 pars. 14-15 Baptism—An Expression of Faith ***
    14 Good associations in the Christian congregation are also important for us to make spiritual advancement. The most desirable companions are spiritually minded fellow believers, persons who enjoy discussing God’s Word and have an intense interest in helping fellow humans. It was to Timothy, an elder in the Christian congregation, that the apostle Paul wrote: “Now in a large house there are vessels not only of gold and silver but also of wood and earthenware, and some for an honorable purpose but others for a purpose lacking honor. If, therefore, anyone keeps clear of the latter ones, he will be a vessel for an honorable purpose, sanctified, useful to his owner, prepared for every good work. So, flee from the desires incidental to youth, but pursue righteousness, faith, love, peace, along with those who call upon the Lord out of a clean heart.” (2 Tim. 2:20-22) Thus the apostle compared the congregation as it had developed in his day to a house containing vessels of all kinds. If it was necessary for an elder to keep clear of ‘dishonorable vessels,’ not making them his intimate associates, this is certainly of even greater importance for spiritual babes whose ‘perceptive powers are not yet trained through use to distinguish both right and wrong.’ (Heb. 5:14) They are far more susceptible to coming under corrupting influences.—Compare 2 Peter 2:18.
    15 This does not mean that we have to look with suspicion at members of the congregation. It is not difficult to identify good companions. Jesus Christ said: ‘Out of the heart’s abundance the mouth speaks.’ (Luke 6:45) Clearly, those whose expressions truly incite us “to love and fine works” are loyal friends. (Heb. 10:24) Association with them can contribute toward a person’s growing to Christian maturity.

    I defended a young man who lived in a nearby town and was cut off from two other friends of mine because of continuing to associate with him. He never knew. The two friends were trying to convince me to cut off friendship with him based on this article.

    I witnessed two people get cut off from their long-time group of friends because they started dating. They have since married and have been married for (counting...) 16 years now. They have not reformed friendships with those who lopped them off. They were cut off based on this article:

    *** w69 3/15 pp. 178-179 pars. 20-23 Living Up to Your Decisions ***
    20 It is a true statement that whatever a person is interested in, this he will talk about. Are you interested in remaining single? Then in your conversations with others do not be discussing the opposite sex at great length, deliberately talking about things that are contrary to your decision. Since your associates will often determine the subject of your conversations, choose as your close associates those who have the same desire and outlook as you—those who have made the same decision.
    21 One’s thinking plays a big part in living up to one’s decision. It would not be wise for one to allow one’s mind to dwell upon the rights that come with the married state if his decision had been to forgo this for some time in the interests of Jehovah’s service. It would also be important to be satisfied with your decision for the time you had made it, otherwise constantly talking about it or thinking about it in your mind would not be living up to your desire for singleness.
    22 A single life in Jehovah’s service should be a full and busy life. Keep your life full with Jehovah. Be willing to take on extra assignments in his service. Do not allow for idle time. When home by yourself fill that time with prayer, personal study and constructive meditation. You are never alone, as your best associates, Jehovah God and Christ Jesus, are always with you. Make good friends so that when you have time for recreation you may do things with these friends. This, too, will contribute to keeping your life full and satisfying.
    23 It is encouraging to keep before you those who chose a single course in Jehovah’s service and were successful in it. The apostle Paul was a fine example of living up to the decision of singleness for those brothers who have made this decision. For our sisters who have decided upon this course, Jephthah’s daughter is an outstanding example of living up to her decision. She lived at a time when a woman’s success in life was measured by her fruitfulness in having a family. Yet she faithfully lived up to her decision to remain single, in harmony with her father’s promise, for the sake of Jehovah’s service.—1 Cor. 7:8; Judg. 11:36-40.

    If they would cut off life-long friends who are now interested in marriage just because they think it might affect their decision to remain single (all of the "staying single" friends are now married), they would cut off someone they perceived as spiritually weak in a heartbeat.


  • Effervescent

    I've always found that this situation causes a sort of panic for Witnesses, when you clearly are not living the JW lifestyle, but haven't been officially black-listed.

    I visited my Elder Father and wife about 10 years ago and were invited to the meeting with my non-JW ex-husband. (I think my Dad was hoping to make an impression on my then husband and lure him in) I had some old friends that still attended the meetings there, and wanted to see them so agreed to go. I've never seen so many darting eyeballs and foot shifting in my entire life. People didn't know whether they should hug me for appearances sake or run screaming the other way for the worldly bad person I was. It was actually quite funny.

    I think they're just worried our Worldly Cooties may rub off on them.

  • minimus

    My brother, his wife and my aunt tried to get my mother to stop associating with me. My mother told them unequivococally (sp?) that she was NOT going to stop being with her son and that if they wouldn't stop asserting themselves, they could simply refrain from calling her. She made it clear that if they wanted to talk about anything, they could----as long as it wasn't regarding me!

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