Father's Day

by pratt1 1 Replies latest jw friends

  • pratt1

    First, I hope all of you Fathers out there had a great day yesterday with your families.

    I had a great day with my wife and daughter, but I would like to share my experience with my dub mother and unbelieving dad yesterday.

    I met my mom and dad at my cousin's home whose wife recently had surgery. My mom and dad spent the day with them preparing sunday's meal and meals for the next few days. As a side note my cousin was a dub in his teens but he left the Borg at 16, because he wanted a normal life.

    Anyway, I gave my dad his father's day gift, the first time I had ever given him a fathers day gift on Father's day. He was deeply moved. Since I was raised a dub, we never celebrated holidays, even though I have given him gifts over the years for holidays, I never specified that they were for a holiday.

    He had tears in his eyes as he accepted the gift.

    This got me thinking how unfair it is to the unbelieving partner when the children are raised as dubs. I noticed my mom didn't show any response to the gift and I think she was secretly envious of the gesture.

    How many of you never celebrated holidays with your unbelieving parent or relative?

    Since leaving the borg, have you begun to engage in giftgiving / celebrating holidays with your relatives?

    Now this is really sad, I don't know my dad's exact birthday - it seems like it was never mentioned in my home, are there any of you out there who do not know the exact birthday of a close relative?

  • jambon1

    After quite a number of years in the org, I left recently. None of my family were ever JW`s. They have sacrificed a lot of occasions over the years which I now feel quite bad about. It dawned on me after I started thinking 'out of the box', that the birthday of your child is a very special thing. My parents had to subdue these natural feelings on my birthday for years. Theirs too, obviously went unnoticed by myself. Now I feel there is nothing wrong with acknowledging the birth of someone special.

    So, recently I sent my sister a card on her birthday. Like your experience, she was moved to tears. I feel that giving cards etc is a way of saying "I love you, I think about you a lot & I`m glad you are alive and part of my life". For years the foregoing has went unsaid by myself.

    Being a JW puts distance between you and your worldly family. They feel it and I think, are saddened by it. Meanwhile you stroll along in JW life and give their feelings little consideration, just as you have to numb yourself to a lot of other things in life.

    These are all things which you can now rectify. Enjoy and have a good life in freedom.


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