World Cup Questions

katiekitten

England are playing Hungary tonight (as I type in fact), and I have some very important football questions that my partner refuses to answer because he is currently busy shouting at the television "what the F*** are you playing at Sven?"

So here are my questions:

1) Who invented the honky tune that goes:

Honk honk
honk honk honk
honk honk honk honk
honk honk

2) Who is it that brings their bongo drums to football matches?

3) Who is is that brings their enormous supersize flags to football matches (you know - the ones that need 15 by 20 people to hold the edges)

3a) and how do all the people in the middle see the match?

3b) and do the people in the middle get pissed off? (15 x 20 = 300 less the people holding the eges that can see, these being 15 + 15 + 18 + 18 = 66 so a total of 300 - 66 = 244 cant see)

3c) how does the owner of the enormous supersize flag get his flag back after everyone has opened it and held it?

BecauseImBroken

I don't know any of the above But Argentina is taking the cake this year :-D

LittleToe

Stuff the bongos, what about the geezer with the bl**dy trombone!?!!

Pubsinger

Katie

You obviously are NOT taking this whole thing seriously are u.

I suggest you take a remote beach holiday for the next 5 weeks or so. Somewhere deserted. Morecambe will do.

You remind me of when my wife sat down to watch a game with me once. I'm a Man Utd fan and we were playing the Filth (Liverpool) She was getting quite into the whole thing and I was shouting similar sort of things at the telly as your partner. Suddenly we scored a beauty and in my cultured and intellectually superior manner I leapt out out of my seat and celebrated wildly. She looked at me totally bewildered and asked why I was cheering. It turned out that she'd assumed we were the team in red but as the game was at Anfield we were wearing white. She's been cheering the wrong team for about an hour

Pub

Duncan

These are questions that all sincere, right-hearted persons want satisfying, truthful answers to.

Until those answers come along, I'll make some stuff up.

I'm old enough to remember the 66 World Cup (forty years of hurt!) and I definitely remember that chant back then, and had the impression at the time that it was fairly newly-minted. So, ithat tells you when, but not who.

As for bongos and general noise-making equipment in general, I suppose it all adds to the "carnival atmosphere" of the occasion - Sheffield Wednesday fans are famous for travelling with an entire band - and I tend to think it's quite good fun, but not when they're right next to you. Most football fans I know think it's a bit of a pain in the arse to get sat next to the idiot who incessantly rings his bloody bell, or - what happened to me at Cardiff last week ( Carm on yew orns! 3 - nil! ) - being sat directly behind two (two! how unlucky is that?) idiots with those bloody deafening aerosol klaxon-hooter things. I pretty much couldn't hear until Monday morning.

As for the giant-flag situation, never experienced it myself (tends to be foreigners - those excitable Latins especially - who go in for that) but it must be, as you say, a bit maddening. You spend the equivalent of £110 in Argentinian Pesos and all you get to see is a vast expanse of blue-and-white stripes. No wonder none of them could see that HE BLOODY WELL PUNCHED THE BALL IN THE NET. Okay, it was twenty years ago now...time to move on maybe, another chance this year.

Bitter? Me?