eh, tis crazy

by KW13 4 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  KW13

  My friend is keeping his distance from me. He's a JW and i think his dads warned him off a bit, sees me as apostate cos i had my friend doubting, i was asking questions and after he failed to answer he then said "so...are you suggesting the society have it wrong or lie?" i said no, i don't wanna fall out with him again.

  Another person i know wants to go to a meeting to see for herself how bad the dubs are, considering saying no actually cos not only do i know a lot of people in local congregations, its gonna mess with her head and mine. No way i want that.

  Mum still refuses to answer me on the books in my room, but she isn't happy about the Crisis of Conscience book, somehow she knows what it is lol...i don't mind removing (hiding) that.

  Stepdad keeps putting his key in the door at night. If i am out already, i can't get back in. Its getting stupid cos its all about control. My friend was here and even though it was late, he said oh er she'll have to go now. I said well were going on a midnight walk and then i'd have to take her back. If you put the key in the lock, i can't get back in. He didn't care, he said "well dont' go then". But i still had to walk her home, and even in that short time he'd lock me out, so i had to wake mum up and get her to tell him. STUPIDITY OR WHAT!! the man is a prick.

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  Mum also on Church books in my room (again). We discussed how she has her books in EVERY room in the house (even mine, though secretly i want them for research purposes) and that i can't have mine out of view in my room. I went on how its selfish and not right that just because she has the message of Jesus and The society all confused and thinks she is 'in' the 'truth' that i have to have my books outta the house. No answer as of yet, still..........
• 

  luna2

  Is there any way you can obtain your own key, KW? Or are they purposely keeping you keyless?

  Re books: I'm sure your Mom doesn't care what is fair at this point. It's a struggle for control and dominance.
• 

  KW13

  i have a key, i have stayed here while they've been away e.t.c but on our door, if a key is in the other can't go in too.
• 

  Sad emo

  Tough times indeedy!!

  My friend is keeping his distance from me. He's a JW and i think his dads warned him off a bit, sees me as apostate cos i had my friend doubting, i was asking questions and after he failed to answer he then said "so...are you suggesting the society have it wrong or lie?" i said no, i don't wanna fall out with him again.

  How many times have you fallen out with him before and over what? My reason behind this question is that maybe your friendship is coming to an end - different interests and all that. Regardless of whether it's his dad warning him off or whether he's worried about your questions himself, at the end of the day, he has to make his own choices as do you.

  Another person i know wants to go to a meeting to see for herself how bad the dubs are, considering saying no actually cos not only do i know a lot of people in local congregations, its gonna mess with her head and mine. No way i want that.

  Have you lent her your CoC book to read - that would sort out the problem with your mum too lol! What are the options for going to a non-local meeting?

  Stepdad keeps putting his key in the door at night. If i am out already, i can't get back in. Its getting stupid cos its all about control. My friend was here and even though it was late, he said oh er she'll have to go now. I said well were going on a midnight walk and then i'd have to take her back. If you put the key in the lock, i can't get back in. He didn't care, he said "well dont' go then". But i still had to walk her home, and even in that short time he'd lock me out, so i had to wake mum up and get her to tell him. STUPIDITY OR WHAT!! the man is a prick.

  I agree - he's a prick!!

  Do you have a set time by which you're supposed to be back? Could you negotiate a time? It is your mum and stepdads house and as such, you do need to abide by their rules - or negotiate. Does he leave the key in the lock at night for another reason eg fire escape? Maybe the solution to this is to ask him not to push the key right into the lock, then you'd still be able to get in.

  Mum also on Church books in my room (again). We discussed how she has her books in EVERY room in the house (even mine, though secretly i want them for research purposes) and that i can't have mine out of view in my room. I went on how its selfish and not right that just because she has the message of Jesus and The society all confused and thinks she is 'in' the 'truth' that i have to have my books outta the house. No answer as of yet, still..........

  Does your mum buy the reasoning that you need your own space and some freedom? Maybe agree/reassure her that your stuff that she finds offensive will not leave your room. Perhaps you could put this into some negotiations on the 'house rules'.

  It does sound as if you're being argumentative with your parents (sorry if I misinterpreted your post) by doing this, you're playing right into their hands - they'll have you down as 'typical teenage boy with attitude problem' - that's what happens when you stray from the troof and become 'wordly'! You're reinforcing their views of life outside the org.

  Grit your teeth, be nice and polite to them and negotiate - and you'll be heaping those burning coals on their heads!
• 

  KW13

  How many times have you fallen out with him before and over what? ; ;My reason behind this question is that maybe your friendship is coming to an end - different interests and all that. ; Regardless of whether it's his dad warning him off or whether he's worried about your questions himself, at the end of the day, ;he has to make his own choices as do you.

  We hadn't spoke for two years, then suddenly he spoke to me (in time for memorial lol). i don't expect really amazing things from him, but its just how quickly because i never went to memorial he is backing off. No real friendship i suppose.

  Have you lent her your CoC book to read - that would sort out the problem with your mum too lol! ; What are the options for going to a non-local meeting?

  ha, you've been paying attention!! Will do that!I agree - he's a prick!!

  Do you have a set time by which you're supposed to be back? Could you negotiate a time? ; It is your mum and stepdads house and as such, you do need to abide by their rules - or negotiate. ; Does he leave the key in the lock at night for another reason eg fire escape? ; Maybe the solution to this is to ask him not to push the key right into the lock, then you'd still be able to get in.

  no time set, but if i am out i am locked out. I like that idea about the key being half in, i will ask!

  Does your mum buy the reasoning that you need your own space and some freedom? ; Maybe agree/reassure her that your stuff that she finds offensive will not leave your room. ; Perhaps you could put this into some negotiations on the 'house rules'.

  It does sound as if you're being argumentative with your parents (sorry if I misinterpreted your post) by doing this, you're playing right into their hands - they'll have you down as 'typical teenage boy with attitude problem' - that's what happens when you stray from the troof and become 'wordly'! ;You're reinforcing their views of life outside the org.

  Grit your teeth, be nice and polite to them and negotiate - and you'll be heaping those burning coals on their heads!

  she likes it both ways, i will ask politely and sit down with them and make an effort to keep calm. thanks!