If you were not raised in the truth.....

by jambon1 3 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  jambon1

  If you were not raised in the truth but came in as an adult, how long did it take for you to realise that what you were taught in the bible study was`nt being practised in the congs.

  For me, I realised things were`nt quite right before I was baptised, probobly within 2 years of association with the org.

  When I became more heavily involved after baptism I realised that some elders/pioneers had drink problems and were involved regularly in 'secret' serious sexual misconduct.

  I became thoroughly disillusioned within 5 years of association when I reported a serious sin which went relatively unchecked because the offender was well liked and was influential in the cong.
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  luna2

  I saw some things that weren't right before I was baptised too. Unfortunately, I was just comning out of a bad marriage which left me with zero self esteem so what I questioned wasn't what I was seeing in the congo, but myself. I thought that I wasn't spiritual enough or that I was too judgmental or that I needed to learn to be more loving and forgiving. I thought it was a test to see if I was truly committed. It really is sad when you can't trust your own eyes and ears.

  This went on for years. I had a harder and harder time making meetings, but I still hung in there. When I moved, it was the beginning of the end for me. My boys were teenagers and getting into teenage trouble, they wanted to play sports, they wanted to date girls...and there I was having to fight all the time to live the way the JWs said we were supposed to, even though a lot of it didn't make sense to me any more. I finally gave up trying to fit my sons into the Watchtower mold because it wasn't healthy for any of us any more. It became obvious that the WTS wasn't truly interested in my well being or that of my children at all...only that we conformed. I was getting sick (stomach trouble where I couldn't eat or I'd be in pain for days) and I couldn't take it any more. I still believed their crap, but I figured I was too weak to live the life so I just faded away.

  Now I'm just pissed that I was such a doofus for so long.
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  Chimene

  Luna you sound like me, downing ourselves, we're not doofuses, we were just brain washed. After about the 3rd or 4th year is when I started to notice that nothing I was taught was actually the way it was being done. I was in for about 7 and a half, to 8 years. Never baptized thankfully do to smoking. I guess that's the only good thing I can say about smoking, LOL

  Although, unlike the jerks there that snuck smoking, I was open and honest about it, but you know how they are, liars, liars, liars
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  elliej

  I was baptized before I had kids, and I was able to get out in service a lot and I felt like I almost fit in. But as soon as I had my first child things went downhill. All kinds of advice from sisters about how to handle the baby so I could listen at the meetings. Criticism for spending too much time in the "nursing" room-- pioneer sisters telling me to give the baby a good whack on the butt and they would learn to stay quiet in the hall. Sisters all wanting to take the baby to show me how to handle her. No thanks. Then the elders, "sister, will you please keep that baby quiet?" even when she was making minimal noise. Of course, all the back seats in the hall were hogged up by the people with no kids who liked to come in late and then leave during the WT study so we always had to sit up farther and it was a commotion to take the crying baby out. Yeah, it was about 2 years before it became very clear to me that things were not what I thought.

  Then as the kids grew, the elders quizzing them on their bible knowledge and then comparing them to other kids who were already unbaptized publishers or knew all the bible books in order, etc. All competition. Do more, do more.

  What sealed it for me was Sister Pioneer who answered during a Watchtower study that its easy to look at someone who you don't think goes out in service enough and think "What a loser!", but we should actually be trying to help them. The elder conducting the study had to explain quickly that she wasn't calling anyone a loser, please don't take it that way, but that is exactly what she was doing. By then it was clear to me that this was not about a brotherhood of love, but about slaving for the organization. That is when I started my fade.