Saint Gerald the Good

by wombat 0 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • wombat

    If you want a good laugh, a good plot for a movie that's never been done or some inspiration on how to live your life....Check out St Gerald the Good.

    Gerald dates back to the year 1000. The Dark Ages, so called because so little was recorded about it.

    This bloke was a loser but forced to become king. He would rather have stayed in the monastry with his mates. He had bad acne and bad eyesight (and we all know what causes that). On becoming King he was urged to set up a date with a chick in the village. After her father had her all scrubbed up for the big occasion he chickened out at the last moment. Her family got a big pay-out to move out of town. He always stayed a confirmed bachelor.

    Gerald refused to fight with anyone. His army hated him because they were never given permission to wage war. So all the neighbouring Kings decided to attack him. It is hilarious to read of how they all failed in spite of Gerald's peaceful ways.

    So in the year 1000, the Church thought it necessary to appoint a Saint to prove to the masses that Satan had not taken over the world. The only person that they could think of was Gerald even though he had never claimed any eccliastical abilities.

    Anyway, before this happening, I think, he wanted to set up a monastry and went in disguise to Rome pretending to be a monk and got their permission to do so. He liked this bloke Benedictine.

    But Gerald didn't want a bunch of bossy-boots running this monastry so he set up strict guidelines as to how it should be run. The blokes in charge will be answerable to everyone below.

    Centuries later, when the newly independent America designed it's Constitution it drew heavily on the rules of the Benedectine order.

    Which means that the pimply faced Gerald from the year 1000 is responsible for Richard Nixon's impeachment.

    Oh yes...The Moral......Never get angry and you will win.

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