Higher Education Story

by onesong 5 Replies latest jw friends

  • onesong
    onesong


    Here's a sad story of what happens when we take man's advice on the education issue.

    My ex-wife ( we went thru a very amiable divorce after 13 yrs. and leaving the Borg) is(was) a third generation JW. Her grandparents were annointed- whatever that means. Her parents followed the advice and lived like the big "A" was coming tomorrow. No education, no savings, no future planning. As a result they now live in a 1 room "apartment" with no money. My father in-law has diabetes, can no longer walk and afford the meds he needs. My mother in-law is caring for her aged , ill mother--all three living in this tiny hell hole. They are all sad, depressed and basically helpless.

    What's so sad is that these people could have lived amazing lives. They have (had) larger than life personalities and could have done or been anything they wanted to. They are an example of the absolute tragedy that takes place following the Society.

    I recently sent them a letter explaining my continued unconditional love for them and their daughter and why I chose to leave. In talking with my ex after receiving my letter they could only express sadness at my "disillusionment". My father in-law saying that he had been doing this for 53 years and wasn't about to give up now.

    Meanwhile my ex and I decided a few years ago that while I was busy being an elder and supporting her she should go to school. Obviously this did not go over well with the cong. and her parents be we went ahead anyway. Now she is just a few credits from her fine arts degree and has a great job at the Institute she attends. She is now in a position of having to ( and being able to ) help out her parents financially. All because of going against the Borg and her parents, and unbelieveably they still don't support her life course!

  • Confession
    Confession
    As a result they now live in a 1 room "apartment" with no money. My father in-law has diabetes, can no longer walk and afford the meds he needs. My mother in-law is caring for her aged , ill mother--all three living in this tiny hell hole. They are all sad, depressed and basically helpless.

    That really does typify it, onesong. And what responsibility does the WTS take for this? An apology for the 1975 fiasco? At least a lessening of the anti-education rhetoric? Sadly no.

  • AnnOMaly
    AnnOMaly

    That is bizarre!

    At least my grandmother now appreciates her great-grandchildren - even though my mom went against her advice (and the Rutherford advice) about getting married and having children.

  • beyondthis
    beyondthis

    I can totally agree with you. I left because of the same reason. I love going to school and my father (an elder) made it nearly impossible for me to go to college. He was not involved during 1975, but became involved in 1977. Nevertheless, he discouraged me to go to school. I'm sure it's due to the fact that when you receive higher education you are taught how to analyze & think critically, something they do NOT want. I actually read an article from their 10/15/05 Watchtower magazine because my dad suggested it. In order to please him I did and I got so upset. They discourage it so much, it pissed me off.

  • riko
    riko

    Oh my god, that is so sad, especially when you know how good their lives could be now.

    I've actually been thinking the last few days...I've been considering starting a pension as my company have just reminded me about it. I'm going to do it as the state of affairs over here is the chances of a state pension when I'm old enough are slim. Just makes me wonder about people in the organisation, without jobs/careers and with no state pension available if that becomes the case, what on earth will they live on?? They won't be thinking of this of course....the new system will be here by then. Why worry about the future?

  • jschwehm
    jschwehm

    Yes, it sounds like the JWs are turning back the clock to the 1980's.

    A friend of mine who went to a neighboring congregation was marked for attending college. I was the goodie goodie pioneer who went to Bethel. When I left Bethel, I had no skills to support myself or my new wife. Finally, my JW parents allowed us to live with them for five years while I went to college. I eventually got accepted to graduate school and got my doctorate in Biochemistry and now I teach at a small liberal arts college in Wisconsin. I am not making tons of money but I am doing something I love and I am making enough money to support myself and my wife. (And it gives me time to expose the Watchtower in my spare time.)

    In any case, when I first started going to college I go the looks from the local dubs. As I learned more about history, it became harder for me to be an active JW as my doubts about what the JWs had been teaching me were confirmed. My wife and I left the JWs in the mid 1990's and I credit my liberal arts education as a major contributing factor to giving us the freedom and knowledge needed to make that healthy break.

    My sister who is about 15 years younger than me, grew up in a totally different environment. By the time she was a teenager the anti-college bias in that congregation had died down considerably. When I would tell her the things I was told my our parents and the elders about going to college when I was her age, she would not believe me. I wonder what she thinks now that they are trying to put the cat back into the bag.

    It should be noted that my sister went to LSU on a scholarship (full ride) and even got to live on campus in a dormitory. That would have been unheard of for me. She once called me after going to a lecture in her sociology class on cults and said "the way my professor described cults it reminded me of the JWs"---smart girl! Needless to say she has nothing to do with the Watchtower but still has many of the wounds associated with being raised a dub.

    By the way....out of the five kids my parents had.....4 of us have college degrees....(and the one without the college degree is doing very well because of his natural street smarts)...however none of us are practicing JWs....my parents consider themselves major failures because of this. Crazy isn't it.

    Jeff S.

    www.catholicxjw.com

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