You do not deserve this

by Seven 1 Replies latest social physical

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  Seven

  Most victims of domestic violence are women. They come from all walks of life and neighborhoods. Domestic violence occurs within a family or intimate relationship as a way to control another person. Victims suffer physical injury, live in fear in their homes, and lose power over their lives. Domestic violence includes: physical abuse,
  mental abuse, sexual abuse, and property or economic abuse(destruction of property or withholding of basic needs). If any of this is happening to you, you can get help.
  *
  Leaving a violent relationship isn't easy. Women may stay because of money, family pressures, concern for their children, fear of or feelings for their abusers. Whether you leave or stay, you can get free help and information from domestic violence programs. No matter where you live, help is just a phone call away. Call the domestic violence program in your area for more information. To locate the phone number: 1. look in your phone book's blue pages under Abuse/Assault 2. call directory assistance 3. ask someone you trust(doctor, nurse, teacher, friend, co-worker). There are telephone hotlines that operate 24 hours a day, and all calls are confidential. Counselors are ready to answer your call and provide emergency help; call the police if you request; provide information on emergency housing, medical care and legal choices. If you simply need to talk, they will be there to listen.
  Counseling centers offer free, private counseling to help you as you sort out your feelings. you can meet and talk with other women who are in abusive relationships as well as those who have left their abusers. Workers will make you aware of your legal rights, housing, public assistance, school and job information and will help with the police, courts, and social service agencies. They often can assist with transportation or accompany you to important appointments. Shelters and Safe Homes are an option available to you, where you can stay free from harm while you decide what to do. The addresses of most shelters and allsafe homes are private. All contact with domestic violence programs is confidential. You can take legal action. Domestic violence is a crime. Legal protections are available. You can file criminal charges against your abuser and/or ask the court to issue a Protection From Abuse order(PFA)to stop
  your abuser from hurting you and your children. You do not need a PFA to file criminal charges, and you do not need to file criminal charges to get a PFA. A judge may grant a PFA order to: keep your abuser away from you and your family, home, and where you work; give you temporary custody of your children; make your abuser pay support or take away your abuser's weapons. In some states, you do not need a lawyer to get a PFA. Develop a safety plan. A domestic violence program can help you get out. NATIONAL
  24-HOUR HOTLINE: 800-537-2238. information provided by the Coalition Against Domestic Violence.

  Edited by - sevenofnine on 22 September 2000 22:22:29
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  waiting

  Hey Seven,

  Thanks for posting this information and the phone number. I used to think that I knew of no persons who would fit this description of abuse.

  Then, in retrospect, after I thought about it:

  One of our employee's wife had a huge bruise on her upper arm (the size of a fist) who was just clumsy and "ran into a door". She also ran into a door when she had a black eye, btw. Several years later, after she left her spouse, that's one of the charges against him - his continuous beating of her. He also put his fist through various walls, doors, etc.

  But I never knew - just thought it was curious that she was so clumsy.

  Another young man I knew was verbally arguing with his wife - she had a 5lb weight in her hand - hit him across the face with it - totally smashed his nose to the point it was further in his face than his cheekbones. Took a lot of surgery to rebuild his cheeks and nose. He was literally beautiful before the attack - afterwards? Looked like an old boxer's face.

  He was a "golden gloves" young boxer. He just never saw the equivelent to a brick coming at him by his wife. She never served time for the attack - and she told the police that he had never hit her. They had been drinking, "and things just got out of hand." Literally.

  Abuse can originate from either spouse - a man or a woman can kill anyone. The point is to get out of the situation before the abusive spouse disfigures and/or kills.

  The other point is to get help - and then try to make the abuse stop, for ourselves and for all the other people that the abusive person is going to make their victims.

  waiting

  Edited by - waiting on 23 September 2000 4:43:54