So I've been on here ~a year I guess. In the mean time I left the (b)org, mostly because the blood transfusion issue which I could not defend for my child and the elders were apologetic about, some telling me to just take the blood, others said it was my own decision. The day I stopped going to the KH my wife never came home from the KH, she left with our newborn child so here's a status update:
- The elders came, threatened me with DF'ing, threatened them back with bringing a defamation suit.
- Wife went back and forth three times, left everytime with the child anytime anything non-positive about the JW's was said.
- I eventually left the house and went living in a shared apartment
- Got a GF, she's been wonderful throughout
- Got an apartment, not too expensive
- Battled in court for a while. I had all the docu with me about blood, child molestation and apostates being mentally diseased and how they will lie in court. My wife accused me of being sexually deviant, using the child for sexual purposes, not caring for the child, not wanting visitation, not paying anything to support her, not having any provisions for the child (all false accusations). She only wanted to permit supervised visitation, supervised by her and her parents (her dad is an elder).
- Supervised visitation by JW's is no joke - being laughed at and scorned while I was playing with my child. Allegations being made, several times, police had been called because I was too early or it didn't work for her that day and I insisted on visitation.
- I was followed and harassed by elders to the point where they knew which movie I went to see and where I ate and who my friends are.
- The child got an attorney appointed, the attorney told the judge that none of the allegations were true, that my living arrangements were well beyond satisfactory for visitation. I got temporary unsupervised visitation from that point forward.
- I got called by an elder inviting me to the memorial. Laughed at him and said no. Police were called every time something I had done something the JW's didn't like. The police convinced them to adhere by the judge's orders.
- After more time, $1500 in lawyer fees and more evidence against the JW: full visitations (going up to what will be effectively half the time when she is ~2 years old), shared custody, make up time, de-facto medical custody (if she disagrees, final decisions will be made by the doctors treating the child), no limitations on after school activities, half the holidays throughout the year, her and my birthday, fathers day etc., 2 weeks per year vacation.
- She requested modifying my times for special JW events like the circuit overseer, memorial and all conventions. It was flat out denied on grounds of her being very uncooperative.
- Final order should be in from the judge soon.
My life is going well for the rest of the time, I barely think of the JW's, don't feel any guilt, don't feel any pressures. Sometimes I have bad dreams and panic attacks but they're going away. I hear a lot still from the ex-JW's in my life, they seem to be hung up on it but I'm not, I have other things to do. I still haven't been disfellowshipped though, I am still a (by now inactive) JW.