Looking for some ideas

by Momofmany 8 Replies latest members private

  • Momofmany
    Momofmany

    I know I have been going about this wrong, so I was hoping you all could help me. I was talking with my mother about the family in SC, (the one where the children died.) To which my Mother replyed that people will lie about god's people. That it's all made up to make it look bad on his org. and his people. She will not believe that any one bad can be baptized, since it has god's blessings, and it's "his organization".

    For the most part we do not discuss religion at all. Yet when it does come up, she acts as if I have three heads and an idiot. If you ever bring any thing up, how do you go about this? I tried to be tactful, but the story just had me shocked, and could not believe someone could do that to their children.

    How, if ever, do you discuss things you found with those who are still in the borg? How do you talk about things without them claiming it has been prophesied that they will persecute us? How should I handle things? Any and all input would be appreciated. TIA

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    well when it comes to God using sinners to do his work and giving them His blessing there is a lengthy history in the Bible of god doing just that

    • nation of Israel
    • King David

    are just a beginning of the list.

    Oh and somewhere there is a scripture (not good at remembering those) that says God would even use Satan or something to that effect

  • pettygrudger
    pettygrudger

    I would just "let it go". There's no way you're going to change your mother's viewpoint, unless she wants to change it. The only thing these conversations cause is frustration - probably for her as well. Remember, in her own mind, she's very upset that you've turned your back on Jah.

    To push it would most likely push her deeper into the org. - and further away from you.

    If you have a tentative relationship w/your mother, then I would just respect her beliefs & leave be - before she decides she can't associate with you any longer.

  • shamus
    shamus

    As what pettygrudger said. Let it go.

    I have friends that are still in, and I know the headache that you get when you talk about things... it can only be ten times worse when it's your own mother!

    You will never win! Whatever you say will be twisted around to mean something else. So just let it go. You're only confirming her 'belief'. The best way to show her 'the truth' is to live your life happily and without a care about Jehovahs Witnesses. It's something that they just cannot figure out!

  • Momofmany
    Momofmany

    Thank you Lady Lee, Pettygrudger, and Shamus.

  • Markfromcali
    Markfromcali

    This kind of question comes up now and then, but what it comes down to is the difference between discussing a subject and reaching a person. As we know, people don't necessarily go by the reasonable, logical conclusions, and the nonsensical "reasoning" often comes from a personal dentity, even when it's learned from an institution it is made to be "me" though in reality it's just a mask.

    So if it was a matter of knowing the subject then we can just get the information and well.. inform them! But of course it doesn't work that way. To reach someone you have to know them really well, and essentially point out the pretense/BS of this religious identity. This has nothing to do with the specific content, (which religion or whether it's even a religious thing) but it's a matter of getting the person to recognize the basic dynamic of self deception. That dynamic is the 'liar', without addressing that you'll just be running around in circles dealing with the specific lies they tell themselves, which is really secondary to exposing the liar.

    You don't need to look hard for ways to reach someone who is honest and openminded, whereas someone who is not may not even be open to the most logical and clear reasoning. It needs to be recognized though that people may feel very threatened by it, and if it's done very bluntly it may hit a nerve but the person will just reinforce the lies and fortify their defenses.

  • Jez
    Jez

    I'm one of those that won't let it go. If my mother is giving her entire life to a religion that is to the detriment of the entire human race, I feel obliged to tell her so. I try to be calm, respectful and logical. One of the important things is to just ask questions I find. Don't answer them, let them, and just nod and say ok, I will think about that, thanks. I would not argue with them BUT when things come up that are standard JWisms "You are talking apostate" "We don't need to worry about that." "I have faith" etc...I would point out that she has been conditioned to shut down her natural thinking process and that ALL JW's say those same things, don't you find that strange? All with the hope that the wells of critical thinking will start to turn slowly in their brain. I would not bombard her with these questions in one sitting, just slip them into our conversation once in a while. It will take time.

    • Why won't you associate with me?
    • Why harm do you think I will cause you?
    • Even if I have made mistakes in my life, isn't your job as a parent to help me succeed anyways?
    • Who was Russell?
    • Why did he start the JW religion?
    • Why do JW keep setting dates as to the time of the end?
    • How many 'anointed' are left?
    • Why does God give new light to the JW when one of their teachings don't pan out?
    • Do you really think God will destroy 99.9% of the population?
    • JW religion is not even considered a 'world religion' it is so tiny...do you know how many Muslims there are?
    • Is everyone else really wrong?

    There are MANY other ideas, most better than mine, from other threads here, about what kinds of questions you can ask to get her to start thinking for herself, and hopefully start to doubt the 'truth'.

  • gumby
    gumby
    For the most part we do not discuss religion at all. Yet when it does come up, she acts as if I have three heads and an idiot.

    How do you talk about things without them claiming it has been prophesied that they will persecute us?

    Unless you are in the Organisation and follow it's teachings, you ARE an idiot in their eyes. Nobody outside the Organisation can have the truth, so why should they listen or believe anyone else?

    Many times there is NOTHING you can do as far as talking to them. My family is cautious concerning anything religious that their flags are up if I even have a look in my eye. If it drives them away from you, don't discuss it as you will be accomplishing nothing other than pushing them further away.

    Gumby

  • tata
    tata

    Hey, I just want to add, that I talked with my mother about this case. At first she act surprise, then she ask me if their really a Jehovah Witness, and she looked at me and said: ?that was Satan?. So in their mind it?s the only explanation.

    But if you really want to try, Jezz give you some interesting question to ask her. Good luck!

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