Story: I get to compete

by Jim_TX 6 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Jim_TX
    Jim_TX

    As most know, competition as a JW was a taboo thing. I remember growing up - in grade school, and having to turn down many opportunities that may have helped me later in life - opportunities that involved 'competing', or receiving 'recognition'. Oh, minor things like an invitation to be on the National Junior Honor Society, Seniors' Honors Night, and H.S. Graduation (I had to pick up my diploma later).

    There were other occasions, but I won't bore you with the details. When I started High School, it was at a school located about a mile from my mom's house. I walked the distance every day - in a short amount of time. One house rule that we had, 'Do not hang around school' after the bell. So, I would make it a point to carry with me any books I needed to take home, and as soon as the last bell rang - I was outta there.

    In the 11th grade, I transferred to another school in the district where they had Radio & TV Shop. This was so I could learn more about what I liked. The school, however, was about 3 miles away from my mom's house. So, this meant that I would need to take the city bus to get there. The buses at that time only ran in 30-minute intervals, and I soon learned that I could almost walk the distance before the next available bus came by - so I saved my 10-cents. -grin-

    Oh. In walking to and from school, my best walking time was about 37-1/2 minutes for the 3 miles. I did my best to trim this time down, but couldn't do it.

    Anyway, in High School, it is required here in the states to take what is known as Physical Education (PE). This involves having to undress in front of a bunch of other guys (or gals - if you're a gal) to change into some gym shorts - and then go and do some physical activity for about 25 or 30 minutes.

    The activities varied - depending on the season. It ranged from football - very popular, to basketball, to volleyball or even baseball.

    I was a geek - and didn't do too well at any sport - and still do not - to this day. Well, at the new school, I tried - I really did. They had us lined up to play volleyball - and I just wasn't that good. They eventually started to 'skip' over my turn, so the good players could be involved.

    This was no fun, so I asked the coach if I could jog around the track. He didn't mind (he was a cool coach), and so that's how I spent my PE time every day. I remember one day, I was attempting to jog the entire 20 or 30 minutes of class time. About half-way into it, one of my buddies came up to me, and was trying to block me - or make me stop - and was asking me 'What're you doin?'. Well, this was a nuisance - as he was in my way - and I was trying to do a non-stop jog - to see if I could. I was literally out on the track swinging my fisted arms at him, and at the same time yelling 'Coach! Make him go away!'. The coach must've been humored by my antics that day - but he did yell at Andrew to tell him to leave me alone - which he did.

    Anyway, I got pretty good at track - unofficially. I wasn't on any track team - it just felt good to run laps. The coach was cool about it too. If there was going to be a track meet that evening, they would run a special piece of equipment over the graveled track, and the coach would just tell me to not mess it and run along the inside of the track. I probably wasn't supposed to be on the track at all... but the coach would let me go on it anyway.

    Well, one day this coach and the coach for the 9th graders made a little side-bet. They each said that their group of kids was better than the other group of kids. To prove it, they decided to hold an impromptu track meet.

    The coach wanted me to run in what they call the '880'. This is 2 laps around a 440 yard track 880 yards is equivalent to a half-mile. I had never competed in any track meets before, but from my past experience, I figured I knew how to handle it. I also figured that I could rationalize it as not necessarily 'competing', but as part of my required PE. -grin-

    I really wanted to see how I did, compared to these other guys. I figured that I would most likely be the slowest - or second-slowest guy on the field, since I have always been lousy at anything I did.

    Well, they lined up about 6 to 8 guys on the starting line. Some were freshmen, others juniors. I was right there with them. I think that the coaches even had a stopwatch on us.

    'Go!' barked the coach - and we took off. Now, from experience, I knew I was not a sprinter - plus, 2 laps was going to be a long way - so when I took off, even though the adrenaline was pumping, I paced myself - and held back. It was hard to do this - and I finally found a slow fella on the track that I just ran alongside for most of the way.

    When it got to the point where there was about a half-lap left to go, I 'flipped the switch', so to speak and started to leave the others behind - as they had used up all their juice the first lap.

    It was cool - I had never in all my life done this - I was actually passing up everybody - coming up on the last one in the pack - a freshman - I came up alongside him - and started to pass. Heck. He started increasing his pace to stay just ahead of me.

    I increased my pace a tad to overcome his increase in pace. Well, as soon as I did - he increased his pace again. This was turning into one of those photo finishes - and I was running outta steam. The best way that I could figure to finish at all was to let him take the lead.

    We crossed the finish line - he was #1 - I was #2. I had beat all the others that had started (well, except for this kid). I felt great - but at the same time - almost sick. I had exhausted myself. I walked around a bit - that was always the coaches' advice - 'Walk it off.'

    They were then going to run a '440' competition. The coach was looking for volunteers - I volunteered, but he said that I had had enough. He was right, but I wanted to run again. Anyway, I only ran once that day, but proved to myself that I could do some things ok.

    After the 'track meet' that day, they tallied up the scores - which they were keeping track of, and guess what? It was a 'tie'. This made me feel better about competing that day - no one won.

    In the final analysis - I didn't run that day, to be better than the other guy - I ran that day to prove to myself that I wasn't such a 'loser', as I had begun to believe. I just knew - deep inside that I could do it. And I did.

    Regards,

    Jim TX

  • Billygoat
    Billygoat

    Thanks for sharing your story Jim. I find it interesting (and sad) how us ex's were so segregated from very healthy things such as competition as we grew up. But competition always takes mental preparation and using your mind too much means you're thinking too much. If you're thinking too much, you're at risk of being an independent thinker. And we all know what Jehovah thinks of independent thinking right?

  • notperfectyet
    notperfectyet

    Great story Jim,

    I was good in track at school, especially the hurdles. I never competed because it was wrong. But I sure wanted too!

    My youngest son got into soccer, not through school sports, but in a city recreation group. He is a natural athlete, and kids who had played for years, he was the teams best player his first year at age 14. It opened my eyes on how competition can build your self esteem. The kids played their best, and the winning and losing teams always shook hands at the end.
    My sons self esteem went up immensely that year.

    Everyone is good at something, you just need to find your niche.

    You were good at running, and now your good at jumping on beds.

  • outnfree
    outnfree

    "You were good at running, and now your good at jumping on beds. "

    Hmmmmm.... How does NPY know this about you, Jim?
    Could it be she's jumping hurdles in pursuit?!!! LOL

    NPY

    Jim -- nice story. Glad you got to feel good about yourself, finally.

    outnfree

    When a true genius appears in the world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him. -- Jonathan Swift

  • dobby
    dobby

    Thanks for sharing that story Jim, it was beautifully written.

    It's so sad that we did not get a chance to develop our natural talents and abilites growing up as witnesses. Especially in sports, kids learn such valuable lessons about teamwork and discipline. It's such a good feeling too, to work hard and excel at something it makes you feel as if you can accomplish anything and gives you tremondous self-esteem.

    I am glad you got to experience that feeling as a teenager, if only for one day.

  • Cassiline
    Cassiline

    Jim,

    What a story. It brings back much of my past. As someone mentioned before its also sad what we were not allowed to do, or going behind your Dad's back to do something, then feeling guilt because we did not want to be losers or outcasts.

    Thanks for sharing Jim, Please know that you have "made it to the finish line" in more ways then one.

    Hugs...

    C

    When the pain of being where we are, becomes greater than our fear of letting go...we will risk and heal and grow.

  • Prisca
    Prisca

    Just posting to let you know I read and enjoyed your story, Jim. I was never good at sports, and especially running. But put a pen in my hand........

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