Part two is here:
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/7/107542/1.ashx
Sometime in January, I recieved an interesting phone call.
Me: Hello?
Caller: Hi, Is Ben there?
Me: Yeah, that's me
Caller: Hi! Do you know who this is?
Me: No.
Caller: It's Becky.
I was kinda shocked at recieving a phone call from Becky. I broke up with her a year and a half ago. I had to get her number since my mother was in the next room, and called her back a few minutes later. She begins telling me that she still has feelings for me, and wished that I was the father of her child! She was currently living with the real father, but said the relationship wasn't going very well, and that he had physically abused her on a few occasions.
Valentine's day was just right around the corner, and I had already invested in a rose for a girl I liked at school. So I told Becky that I was already seeing someone else, just to be on the safe side. Honestly, I wanted to date someone new instead of going back to something I had already tried.
When Valentine's day rolled around, I was badly rejected by the girl I had sent a rose to. So, a couple of weeks later, I told Becky that me and my girlfriend had split up. We then made plans to meet up at her place (which was also her boyfriend's place) and chat a bit.
The big day comes along, and she's suppose to wait for me at the bus stop. I ring the bell, get off, and see Becky for the first time in about a year. She didn't change much. She immediately gives me a hug and we headed back to her place. I really felt out of place there. I'm guessing she told her boyfriend that I was "just a friend."
Me and Becky were sitting, chatting, and watching some talk show on TV. The subject was somewhat coincidental. They were interviewing some skinheads with regards to a situation where two children (who became skinheads) killed their JW parents.
Becky's comment on the subject was, "Yeah, skinheads don't like you guys very much". I was completely surprised at the whole subject, and that something like this would happen. Now, here I am already doubting the JW religion, being sucked into Satan's wicked world, and I'm watching something negative on television about the JWs. The downward spiral would continue.
After chatting for a bit, I decide to head home. She walks me to the bus stop, and we continue bullshitting while I'm waiting for the bus. She gives me a hug, we kiss, and I get on the bus. So there I am, sitting on the bus, feeling all good inside. It was a long time since I felt that way. Actually, the last time I felt that way was when I was dating Becky the first time. While I was sitting on the bus in la-la land, I looked out the window and saw a JW from my congregation! I start laughing, thinking "if only he knew!"
I think the thing that really drew me back to Becky was that I never really felt loved. My parents had a very horrible way of expressing it. My mother would occasionally try to hug me, and I felt absolutely disgusted by it. I believe it had to do with all the years of negative touch from her. To this day, I still hate being touched by my mother. Becky gave me a different kind of touch. It was all good touch. It made me feel as if I was valuable.
However, we couldn't freely date each other because she was still living with her boyfriend. Over the next few months, she worked on getting out of her relationship, and moving back to her mother's place. Another thing that happened over this period of time, I got a car.
One thing Becky mentioned to me, and started to on a regular basis, is that she "wanted to have my baby!" Now, here I am, 17 years old with my whole life ahead of me. Why the hell would I want to become a father? The thing I was most concerned about at this time was getting the hell out of the JW religion. Having a baby or even losing my virginity was the last thing on my mind.
As me and Becky kept talking over her transition period, I had begun to remember why I dumped her in the first place. She constantly talked about meaningless crap, but she had developed a new skill: compulsive lying. I believe she was looking for pity, because she told me she needed a liver transplant. Now, I'm no doctor, but how many 16 year old girls need a liver transplant?
On one date, Becky wanted me to pick her up to get some stuff from her apartment. On the way there, she kept her hand on my leg. When we got to her apartment, she gave me the grand tour. When we got to the kitchen was the best part. We hugged. Then we french kissed. The only thing I hated about that was she sure as hell didn't brush her teeth in recent days. She tasted horrible! I had to restrain myself from throwing up into her mouth. Actually, that would've been kinda funny. After we kissed, she looked at me and smiled. I couldn't help but notice the huge gunk buildup where her teeth meet her gums. I couldn't believe I was kissing that!
When we got in the elevator, she was touching my ass. As we continued driving, she started grabbing my crotch. The grabbing eventually got harder. Now, grabbing a guy's nuts is a no-no. I almost crashed the fucking thing because I thought my nuts were gonna pop! I told her in the nicest way I could that squeezing them hurts.
The Yearly Convention of Jehovah's Witnesses had come! Goddam I hated those things. My ass wouldn't fail to fall asleep numerous times during the day. After Convention Day one was over and I had regained feeling in my ass and changed out of my smelly meeting clothes, I went out with Becky. We stopped at some restaurant, had a coke and talked for a while. Now, one thing I always seem to notice with girls I've dated is the look in their eyes. The best way I can describe it is the look of attraction. Becky was giving me this look again, and it's almost as if you can feel your eyes pulling each other in like two magnets.
After we were done our cokes, she wanted to find a "quiet spot." I eventually parked behind an abandoned lumber store. My first huge makeout session had begun! She was rubbing my manly goods while we were making out. Anything I had remembered at the Convention had been forgotten at this point. The car windows were fogged to hell.
After I dropped her off and went home, she called & thanked me. At this point, I was enjoying the sexual attention too much. There was no way in hell I was going to dump her now, despite her compulsive lying and planning our future family!