I originally posted my story on H20 last November, and since then have found Jehovahs-witness.com and have been lurking avidly and gratefully most days. Your comments have been enormously helpful in the process of treading carefully (we have family still “in”), and making a new life for ourselves.
We’re in the process of leaving the organization “quietly” after 40 years. My husband was an elder from the beginning of the arrangement, and a servant before that. We have had no quarrels with anyone, nor rocked the boat.
We were baptised in the 50’s, and then many of my family joined. We had three children, so we had a family structure within the society.
Over the years, doubts surfaced, quickly swallowed, birthdays, higher education, programming children to pioneer, etc. Changes in doctrine also brought misgivings – higher powers, Sodom and Gomorrah, resurrection, 1975, ordained/not ordained – also swallowed.
You stay for many reasons, family ties, no friends outside because of the them/us mentality, trusting the GB, and knowing that there are some good JWs. Also, it takes courage to abandon a belief system. It leaves a “God-hole” in your life.
All the time, you say to yourself, “The GB will put it right eventually. Where else is there to go?” Have you ever noticed that the nicest JWs are the new ones? After a while, they become like so many in the cult – power-loving aparatchiks if anatomically equipped, and powers-behind-the-throne lovers if anatomically bereft. (If you’re not connected to a “glorious one”, you’re nobody.)
After years of swallowing doubts, I drew a line in the sand – if they abandon “generation”, that’s it. The CO came to the congregation and said, “Now we have new light on “Generation”. Weren’t we silly to believe anything else?” End of explanation. I knew better than to ask questions.
I then researched the society’s own literature, and saw now their prophecies promulgated as God’s word, were just dropped when it was obvious they were indefensible. I then read some of the old books which they still cite today (selected quotes only) and they are absolute balderdash. The writing dept. must feel safe in the knowledge that no one will read them – they are so boring. The next step was Ray Franz’s two books, and benefiting from the research shared by many of you.
So, the way out for us was reading. Life begins at 60+ and has never been so good. We have a lot of catching up to do.