Knowledge Book, Separation and Abuse

by IslandWoman 8 Replies latest jw friends

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  IslandWoman

  The 1995 edition of the "Knowledge That Leads to Everlasting Life" book states on page 122 paragraph 11:

  Those living together as husband and wife should make sure that their marriage has been properly registered with the civil authorities. (Mar 12:17) They also need to view wedlock as a serious responsibility. True, separation might become necessary in cases of willful nonsupport, extreme abuse, or the absolute endangerment of spirituality.

  OK. Now what if a sister who finds out the scum of a brother she is married to has molested her little girl or boy and decides to separate on the grounds of extreme abuse and absolute spiritual endangerment.

  If there are not two witnesses to the abuse the elders will not act, yet she might still act on her own and seek at the least a legal separation in accord with what she was taught in the Knowledge book.

  Will there be repercussions from the elders for this? Also, would she not need to explain to her friends the why of her action in order to maintain her own reputation in the congregation?

  IW

  Edited by - IslandWoman on 23 November 2002 16:3:21
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  DakotaRed

  IW, I think the response will vary from Kingdom Hall to Kingdom Hall. Since there appears to be much variation in interpretation from elder to elder, who can say what would happen to a sister. In my own case, there was no abuse nor non-support, but I guess since I DA'd, I was considered an endangerment to her spirituality. So, the marriage ended on those grounds, with the Kingdom Hall she attends supporting her leaving. Never mind I didn't have any problem with her going, just no longer wanted to hear how wonderful and great they are. To be fair, there were also many other problems in the marriage, besides the Watchtower, but they were workable, if any efforts were made.

  Personally, I feel any male that fails to support his family or that ever strikes or otherwise abuses his spouse, is amongst the lowest scum on the earth. I would support them receiving what they dished out, tenfold. But, the inclusion of the vague "endangerment of spirituality," seems to encourage the destruction of otherwise healthy marriages due to ones mate simply disagreeing with the Watchtower. To me, that is in direct opposition of Jesus' admonition;

  Matthew 19:6. So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder." (RSV)

  Instead of supporting marriage, they seem to destroy them.

  Lew W
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  JT

  IW, I think the response will vary from Kingdom Hall to Kingdom Hall. Since there appears to be much variation in interpretation from elder to elder, who can say what would happen to a sister

  this is an excellent point and is highlights the problem with the org, while the wt claims to have unity of thought this is a perfect example of why this is a lie

  consider a hall where the elders are educated professional men and a hall in the congo where the top elder has a 5th grade education,

  now think of how thier personal life exp along with goofy unclear INSTRUCTIONS from wt will play out

  i look right here in washington dc, where i was in a hall were for the most part the elders tried to be good organizaitonal men and do it by the book, wt procedures-

  then you would get those elders who would just give their opinion on almost everything and the poor publishers felt it was from the organization-

  so when you combine wt goofy rules and the personal views of some uneducated elder who thinks god has appointed him, one can only expect females who seek out such men to get directions as varied as the colors in the rainbow

  over and over we have seen how regional RULES AND LAWs were viewed as THE SOCIETY'S VIEW in so many areas , college retirement, savings , hobbies, music , social functions, dress lengths , beads EVEN THE WEARING OF WHITE SHIRTS ON THE PROGRAM

  IT IS this combination of wt rules and personal views of elders that have caused untold harm to be done

  my mom would have left my dad years ago, TO DAY THEY ARE DIVORCEa of course she has left wt-

  but i recall growing up the elders would come by and tell mom to WIN HIM WITHOUT A WORD dogma-

  so women all around the world who have went to the elders for advice UNBEKNOWN to them would be gettting advice that a sister 2 halls over would never be told

  how sad indeed
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  IslandWoman

  Lew,

  So, the marriage ended on those grounds, with the Kingdom Hall she attends supporting her leaving

  That's incredible. The three stipulations or allowances were for separation only not divorce. The whole elder arrangement is stupid. Body's of Elders are rife with incompetent men who only got there because they could give a damn talk on the platform without sounding like a jackass and in addition wrote down the appropriate number of required hours on their monthly field service reports.

  I've known quite a few elders who in their own life did not know their right from their left yet were put in positions to judge others. The whole elder system is stupid. It used to be that the "Congregation Servant" was the top dog, the thought being that he was the best qualified in the congregation. Since 1972 though, every idiot and his brother can be an elder. No wonder the Service Department keeps sending them "idiot" letters that take them from step A to B.

  IW
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  Mary

  Their stand what is and isn't acceptable as grounds for separation and divorce is an ever-revolving door. I posted her a few months ago about a sister I knew in Toronto about 25 years ago who was disfellowshipped because she divorced her husband on grounds of beastiality, but according to the dim-witted-light at the time, the GB said this did not constitute "adultery" or "fornication". She ended up committing suicide afterwards and her scumbag husband remarried........LOSERS!!!
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  Blueblades

  Hi! IslandWoman,Your thread and the responses to it are clarified in the next chapter, ch.14.WHOSE AUTHORITY SHOULD YOU RECOGNIZE? This is probably one of the most important chapters in the book in preparing a person to become a loyal Jehovah's Witness.It is very subtly written, but the main thrust is that there is a chain of authority and the Watchtower Society is the "ULTIMATE" in that chain of authority.Just as a person is supposed to be in subsmission to God,they are to be in submission to the Society.They very cleverly teach that the Watchtower Organization is the same as God---so if one finds fault with the decisions of the imperfect men who rule the Society,they are accused of actually complaining against God Himself! Thus no Jehovah's Witness can find fault with anything the Organization does without being accused of being disloyal to Jehovah.So there is a need to separate the two teachings to actually see the" ERRORS " and changes the Watchtower Organization makes in their rules they give to the Elders when counseling Married persons who are having difficult marital problems to contend with.The WT.Society is not the "ULTIMATE " authority,God is! Elders are not in the qualified position to offer advice or solutions to Married persons.One of our Elders schools actually told us that we were not in the position to resolve many of the problems that the congregation was undergoing. I thought you might appreciate this information. Blueblades
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  Siddhashunyata

  Dakota Red, thanks for taking a clear stand against the phrase "spiritual endangerment " as cause for seperation or divorce. Yes, such a general phrase offers generous support to a "believer" poised for seperation or divorce and ironicaly undermines their spirituality.
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  BluesBrother

  I believe that ther has been a softening attitude towards marital breakdown in recent years. It used to be absolutely until death unles the other party committed adultery. (As per Jesus words )

  In recent times a longer list of acceptable reasons to seperate has been published and the phrase "Non Scriptual Divorce" has been used. This implies that you can have a secular divorce agreed by the State, so the couple can split but they are not free to remarry .
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  Siddhashunyata

  "Softening" is gratuitous . A better term would be "cunning".