The Watchtower publishing corporation loves the DF rule because it isolates JWs from hearing critical information of their business cult, a cult that is disguised as a religion. In the excellent thread yesterday about the 'Hardline' on DFing ... this point was made in the Aug. 2002 KM:
5. Indeed, it is just as page 31 of the same issue of The Watchtower states: "The fact is that when a Christian gives himself over to sin and has to be disfellowshiped, he forfeits much: his approved standing with God; ... sweet fellowship with the brothers, including much of the association he had with Christian relatives."
The Watchtower presumption is that a shunned former JW has always given themselves over to sin, and somehow deserve total shunning. The result is that those DF'd or DA'd lose 'sweet fellowship' including that with relatives. This flies in the face of their media site statement, which states:
Do you shun former members?Those who simply leave the faith are not shunned. If, however, someone unrepentantly practices serious sins, such as drunkenness, stealing, or adultery, he will be disfellowshipped and such an individual is avoided by former fellow-worshipers. Every effort is made to help wrongdoers. But if they are unrepentant, the congregation needs to be protected from their influence. The Bible clearly directs: "Remove the wicked man from among yourselves." (1 Corinthians 5:13) What of a man who is disfellowshipped but whose wife and children are still Jehovah's Witnesses? The spiritual ties he had with his family changes, but blood ties remain. The marriage relationship and normal family affections and dealings can continue. As for disfellowshipped relatives not living in the same household, Jehovah's Witnesses apply the Bible's counsel: "Quit mixing with them." (1 Corinthians 5:11) Disfellowshipped individuals may continue to attend religious services and, if they wish, they may receive spiritual counsel from the elders with a view to their being restored. They are always welcome to return to the faith if they reject the improper course of conduct for which they were disfellowshipped.
Source: http://jw-media.org/beliefs/beliefsfaq.htm
Yellow highlight, bolding, and underlining are mine
1. Notice first, that those who simply cease to be involved (fade away) are not shunned? This is a blatant lie, as the Watchtower has instructed JWs to view those who leave in such a manner, and this would include ceasing attending meetings, as 'worldly' and to a JW being 'worldly' means shunning. This was announced at the District Conventions in the Summer of 1992.
2. Then notice that those DF'd are merely 'avoided' as I yellow highlighted. Avoidance is not the same as deliberate shunning, which is what JWs do.
3. Then, notice that family ties are only chnaged in a spiritual way, but all else is the same. This gives a non-JW reader that the process means only that the religious aspects are affected, but that otherwise all else stays normal.
If you click on the word Disfellowshipped or here: http://www.watchtower.org/library/w/1988/4/15/article_01.htm you will see an article on how JWs view DFing as discipline. Again, the presumption is that anyone DF'd or DA'd somehow deserves "discipline" and no allowance is made for other factors.
The above 3 items noted from their media FAQ demonatrates that the Watchtower Society lies by twisting the impression given to non-JW readers who explore their web site and is clearly inconsistent with the August 2002 Kingdom Ministry monthly phamplet. The inconsistency is nothing but a deliberate lie intended to deceive and cause harm, misleading the innocent public to take them seriously and even induce someone to join them ... and intended to harness JW victims from being fully heard by their friends and relatives still in the religion.
Finally, they assume that former members somehow live in anguish over lost "sweet fellowwhip" ... something again that twists the truth. I, nor likely most former JWs miss the bulk of JW fellowship, nor do we consider it "sweet" with respect to any so-called 'brotherhood' ... a brotherhood that is no different from an Amway business opportunity ... however ...
We do miss family ties. We resent the needless broken marriages and family rifts resulting from the total one-sdied shunning that is not told in their media spin article. We mis some really good friends, often such being life-long ... but ... we have discovered that 99% of those that we once thought we 'friends' were nothing more than people who used us, and who we not as genuine a friend as they pretended to be ... just like an Amway friend, you are loved only as long as you are enriching someone else ... but when the dollars stop, then you are quickly forgotten ... they are fake friends ...
I wrote to or called JW friends when I left the religion. I knew that I was going to be forcibly DA'd ... so I called my closest JW friends to let them know of the injustice, and to try and keep contact ... when I thought about my list ... I boiled it down to about 15 families ... which included the JW who brought me into the religion, and seveal I brought into the religion ... and all of these I knew for many years, most at least 20 to 25 years.
In the end, out of a total of hundreds of friends, I could only think of 15 families ... and out of these, only one family stuck with us past my DA ... and that lasted about 6 months ... and then we lost them too ... so, essentially, except for the family and friends who came out with us and a few who later joined us ... every last JW friend proved to be anything but a friend ... and as of this writing, I have ceased any interest in any of them ... and while I would consider renewing ties ... I have no thoughts of sewwt fellowship with them ...
Out side of non-JW friends I have made since then, and some renewed like my life-long best friends, Ken Deal and Bill Voorhis, and of course my family ... I find that you folks here and many other ex-JWs I have met on other forums and at BRCI, etc. are friends. The kind of friends I can trust and would rather have over anyone remaining in the JW organization that I lost.