Being a JW Kid

Scully

I've always felt that the adult JWs got off pretty easily compared to JW kids.

For instance:

My dad went to work, and didn't bother his co-workers with JW stuff. It wasn't allowed.

My mom stayed at home, and didn't really bother the neighbours with JW stuff unless she was going door-to-door. And even then, we never worked in our own neighbourhood. She was still friendly with the ladies on the street, but she knew enough to not nag them with JW stuff if she wanted their company.

My brothers and I went to school. We had to ask EVERY DAY to be excused from morning exercises when "O Canada" was sung, and the Lord's Prayer was said. We had to take the flack from classmates (kids can be quite mean to you when you're different), we were also subjected to abuse by teachers - one in particular who would not allow me to be excused, and at the time it was expected by JWs that their children would either be excused, or sit quietly during the national anthem, and this teacher would pull me to my feet by the hair on the back of my neck. My parents never did anything to intervene, saying that it was 'persecution' and we should be glad about it.

We were also the ones who had to 'give a defense' at every single holiday and birthday that was observed, and why we couldn't participate in the activities.

I don't think JW parents, unless they were JW kids themselves, fully understand the burden they place on their children. As well, it's the children who have NO SAY when it comes to blood. JW parents refuse to allow their children to have blood transfusions; but what if the child wants to live even though it means "breaking God's laws"?? It's one thing for an adult to make that decision for themselves, but when I think about how my parents talked that they would rather have us die 'faithful to Jehovah' by not taking blood, it reminds me of the scripture where God chastises Israel: And they built the high places of the Ba'al in order burn their sons in the fire as whole burnt offerings to the Ba'al, something that I had not commanded or spoken of, and that had not come up into my heart. (Jeremiah 17:5)

It continues to bewilder me how JWs can put their kids through things like this and think it's a good thing to do. The fact that God stopped Abraham from sacrificing his son, Isaac, should be enough to tell them that it's not what a "real" God would want. The scripture in Jeremiah confirms it. Yet we see time and time again experiences of children being sacrificed over the blood issue.

All I can say is that I'm glad I never had to make that choice and that I'm glad I'm out of that cult!!

Love, Scully

It is not persecution for an informed person
to expose a certain religion as being false. - WT 11/15/63

A religion that teaches lies cannot be true. -WT 12/1/91

Mollie

I am no longer a JW and I was not raised as one. However, my one and only son was raised in the religion and he remains there. But it sounds to me that your parents were neglectful of their children's needs and they were not protective of them. I can say that I was totally opposite and I was one of those mother's that always made sure that my son was not treated in a manner that was cruel, etc by teachers or other classmates for that matter. I substitute taught for awhile to help him to stand on his own two feet. I can remember on several occasions making trips to the school for different occurences that were inappropriate with teachers etc. I was always felt that since I didn't know how he felt since I was not raised in the religion, that I wanted to make sure that I didn't neglect his feelings. I do know that your parents seem to be the rule and not the exception among JW's. I saw years of neglect from parents in the Kingdom Halls mostly the mothers. I never understood and never, ever agreed with them treating their children this way. I can remember numerous "Sisters" would keep their small children out for hours to pioneer. I always felt that my first responsibility was to this gift that God had given me, my child. I'm sorry you were not treated the same.

144thousand_and_one

Scully,

The JW kids do get the short end of the stick. You forgot to mention the beatings for not being able to sit still at meetings, exploitation of children in JW marketing efforts, forbidden involvement in school sports and activities, inhibited social development via exclusion of "worldly" associations, and discouragement of higher education. To sum it up, JW's work hard to prepare their children to fail in life. Unfortunately, they've been quite successful at it.

teenyuck

Scully,

You hit the nail on the head...that is exactly what happened to myself and my sister.

Same issues with nasty teachers not liking that there were children who were not catholic in the class. I had to go sit in the coat room, quite a few times for being a JW.

Mollie-it was not an issue of our parents being neglectful...they were told (and in turn told us) that things happening like this was good. It showed we were persecuted and this would be good in Jehovah's eyes.

It is terrible being an outcast like that. There is not much that can make up for a lost childhood.

To sum it up, JW's work hard to prepare their children to fail in life. Unfortunately, they've been quite successful at it.

That is the bottom line...we were set up to fail in the real world.

Mollie, you are the exception, not the rule as JW mothers go.

terafera

I'm glad I'm not the only one with memories of having to stay in the principal's office or stand in the hallway during the 'Pledge of Allegiance'.

Too many times I was sent to the principal's office while they practiced the Christmas program. The ladies who worked in the office never knew why I was there, and just assumed I did something wrong, so they would tell me to draw on a piece of paper and keep my mouth shut. I felt so bad...

Many times (growing up in Hawaii) they would practice hulas for MayDay or just anything in particular. I always had to sit under a tree while girls tried on pretty dresses and put flowers in their hair. I felt so alone....

Many of my teachers hated jw's and took it out against me. One teacher in 2nd grade asked the kids to write why they loved Christmas. She said that my assignment was to write why I didnt celebrate it. So I was honest... I said men at the Kingdom Hall said it was bad and I would die from Jehovah if I did it!! The teacher made me stand in front of 20+ kids (it was a combined class) and read it. Afterward, there was dead silence. The teacher then proceeded to question me on my faith and ask how would God kill me for celebrating Christmas. I just stood there, my face burning hot (I was 7 at the time!!!!). I wanted to die... later, when the teacher sent the story home, my mom read it and about killed me. She said what an idiot I was and how I didnt know a damn thing, it was obvious to her I didnt listen to the meetings. But she never did explain why we couldnt do it. Thinking back, I was an honest kid.... I wrote exactly what I had been told at meetings!

How many times did I want to explore my musical talents through Band but couldnt? How many times did I want to explore my leadership skills and run for class President? How many times did I want to get fit and join the Volleyball Club?

So much lost...... it wont happen to my son!!!!!!!

Mollie

Dear Puffsrule,

I know that I was the exception to the rule. Reading some of the other posts, it makes me sick to my stomach that people would put their children through the torture that obviously has been endured by many JW children. When there were school events that my son could not participate in, I would go and pick him up and we would go to the movie, etc. If there was artwork that he could not color due to holidays, I always made sure he had something better to color! It usually made the other kids in his class want what he had. I guess I was using reverse psychology. I suppose it goes back to the point that JW's aren't allowed to think for themselves, because there is no man/woman alive that could tell me what my child's needs are, or what the "christian" thing to do is/was. I guess maybe that is why I didn't survive being a witness.

razorMind

To sum it up, JW's work hard to prepare their children to fail in life. Unfortunately, they've been quite successful at it...

CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAP

{{{LOUD APPLAUSE}}}

From 2 former JW kids, my sister and I!!! Thank you Scully, for this thread. Fortunately we never endured the abuse and neglect of some other JW kids here, but...

...sometimes the only other ppl who can understand and truly "get it" (what we had to go through, that is) are other former JW kids.

Again, so much lost, but my sister is making sure my niece won't experience that! She won't even allow my parents to take her to the Hall.

SYN

Being a JW kid was *AWFUL*. I didn't have the best sense of self-worth back then, and all the derision and loneliness (nobody really wanted to hang out with me, as everyone thought I was weird ) didn't help much either.

Yip, I also stood outside during Assembly and all that other pointless jazz.

The thing is, (I only remembered this now - I'd forgotten it for a long time) was that I DA'd myself about 2 years before I finished school, and it was so weird standing up when everyone else stood up (although I still never sang the anthem or anything like that, because I simply considered stuff like that to be VERY lame in any case).

"I see no good reasons why the views given in this volume should shock the religious sensibilities of anyone." -- Charles Darwin, The Origin Of Species, 1869.

Hairy Harr

Scully & other persecuted ones...
I too stood up for awhile but as a kid it is really hard, especially if you're the only one in your class or your school! So then you start to give in..maybe sing a xmas song or mumble the Pledge or whatever...then comes the guilt because you know you are going to die one goddamn firey, painful death for your unfaithfulness to Jehovah. Oh well, the Shrinks are making lots of money off of us now. Thank you,
HH

plmkrzy

Boy does this bring back memories of my old neighborhood.
I must have been one of the lucky ones when it comes to
relationships with neighbors. My mom must have had at least 5
bible studies going on our block and I went to school with their kids, some of us grew up together.I think only one of her bible studies went all the way and got baptized but the others who didn't, thier kids grew up & began studdying and are now JWs. We still keep in touch with a lot of them. Even the ones who don't want any part of WT. as long as religion is kept out of the conversation everyone gets along fine.
plm

Being a JW Kid

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