Complements of the late Jan Groenveld, much loved and much admired.....still in our hearts.
For those of you with a problem relationship.....or perhaps you may find that the whole picture depicts an actual organization...hmmmm?
Subject: Profile of a Sociopath
A number of cult leaders may exhibit many of the behavioral
characteristics of a sociopath--an outstanding ability to charm and
seduce followers. Since they appear apparently normal, they are not
easily recognizable as deviant or disturbed. Although only a trained
professional can make a diagnosis, it is important to be able to
recognize the personality type in order to avoid further abuse. These
traits also apply to a one-on-one cultic relationship.
Glibness/Superficial Charm
Language can be used without effort by them to confuse and convince
their audience. Captivating storytellers that exude self-confidence, they
can spin a web that intrigues others. Since they are persuasive, they
have the capacity to destroy their critics verbally or emotionally.
Manipulative and Conning
They never recognize the rights of others and see their self-serving
behaviors permissible. They appear to be charming, yet are covertly
hostile and domineering, seeing their victim as merely an instrument to
be used. He dominates and humiliates his victims.
Grandiose Sense of Self
Feels entitled to certain things as "his right." Craves adulation and
attendance. Must be the center of attention with his own fantasies as
the "spokesman for God," "enlightened," "leader of humankind," etc.
Creates an us-versus-them mentality
Pathological Lying
Has no problem lying coolly and easily and it is almost impossible for
them to be truthful on a consistent basis. Can create, and get caught up
in, a complex belief about their own powers and abilities. Extremely
convincing and able to pass lie detector tests.
Lack of Remorse, Shame or Guilt
A deep seated rage, which is split off and repressed, is at his core.
Does not see others around him as people, but only as targets and
opportunities. Instead of friends, they have victims and accomplices
who end up as victims. The end always justifies the means and they let
nothing stand in their way.
Shallow Emotions
When they show what seems to be warmth, joy, love and compassion
it is more feigned than experienced and serves an ulterior motive.
Outraged by insignificant matters, yet remaining unmoved and cold by
what would upset a normal person. Since he is not genuine, neither are
his promises.
Incapacity for Love
While He talks about "God's love" he is unable to give or receive it.
Since he does not believe in the geniuses of his followers' love, he is
very harsh in testing it from his devotees and expects them to feel guilt
for their failings. Expects unconditional surrender.
Need for Stimulation
Living on the edge, yet testing the beliefs of their followers with bizarre
rules, punishments and behaviors. Verbal outbursts and physical
punishments are normal.
Callousness/Lack of Empathy
Unable to emphasize with the pain of their victims, having only
contempt for others' feelings of distress and readily taking advantage of
them. Their skills are used to exploit, abuse and exert power. Since the
follower cannot believe their leader would callously hurt them, they
rationalize his behavior as necessary for their ( or the group's) own
"good" and deny the abuse. When devotees become aware of the
exploitation it feels like a "spiritual rape" to them.
Poor Behavioral Controls/Impulsive Nature
Rage and abuse, alternating with small expressions of love and
approval produce an addictive cycle for abuser and abused, as well as
creating hopelessness in the victim. Believes he is all-powerful,
all-knowing, entitled to every wish, no sense of personal boundaries,
no concern for his impact on others. His followers only see him as near
perfect.
Early Behavior Problems/Juvenile Delinquency
Usually has a history of behavioral and academic difficulties, yet "gets
by" by conning others. Problems in making and keeping friends;
aberrant behaviors such as cruelty to people or animals, stealing, etc.
Irresponsibility/Unreliability
Not concerning about wrecking others' lives and dreams. Oblivious or
indifferent to the devastation they cause. Does not accept blame
themselves, but blame their followers or others outside their group.
Blame reinforces passivity and obedience and produces guilt, shame,
terror and conformity in the followers.
Promiscuous Sexual Behavior/Infidelity
Cult leaders frequently practice promiscuity, child sexual abuse, rape
and sexual acting out of all sorts. This is usually kept hidden from all
but the inner circle. Stringent sexual control of their followers, such as
forced breakups and divorces, removal of children from parents, rules
for dating, etc.
Lack of Realistic Life Plan/Parasitic Lifestyle
Tends to move around a lot or makes all encompassing promises for
the future. Many groups claim as their goal world-domination or other
utopian promises. Great contrast between the leader's opulent lifestyle
and the followers' impoverishment. Support by gifts and donations
from his followers who are pressured to give through fear and guilt.
Highly sensitive to their own pain and health.
Criminal or Entrepreneurial Versatility
Changes their image and that of the group as needed to avoid
prosecution and to increase income and to recruit a range of members.
Is able to adapt or relocate as needed to preserve the group. Can
resurface later with a new name, a new front group and a new twist on
the scam.