Working on yourself

by Introspection 5 Replies latest watchtower medical

  • Introspection
    Introspection

    Are you working on yourself or working on your ideas? Often some of those beliefs will be tied into a person's sense of self, but I think there's something to be said about being direct. This is very hard to talk about, especially online, but the fact is when we just throw out concepts it's easier to be distant to it, and even things which may be close to our hearts are only that, things. It seems to me that it can be very easy to look at all these issues and convince yourself that you are working on yourself when you're only working on anything other than yourself, be it changing some ideas (or more typically, accepting some new ones and rejecting some oldies) or trying to get other people to change. Of course, in this case all you're really doing is avoiding what you have to deal with, right here and now. Atleast those who admit they are afraid to do that are honest enough to acknowledge that they are doing it, (or not) whereas people who develop another sense of self based on some nice ideas they read about (which can of course be useful, but dealing with those ideas doesn't necessarily mean you are dealing with yourself) are really only dealing with ideas, even if one of those ideas is that they are working on themselves.

    I'd like to say more about this, but I think it's one of those things that will only get confused if you talk about it too much. Ideas about this abound don't they? Whether you're working with someone or just doing some kind of self-help, there's a ton of information out there. I'm sure different kinds of work is very helpful for different people, but as obvious as it may sound please try to keep in mind that whatever you do, you've gotta deal with yourself. Maybe it's clearer to see in a relationship. You might read something like John Gray's book on Mars and Venus or something, but at the end of the day you have to deal with the partner you want to have a relationship with, and the book just isn't THAT specific! There is a specific guy/gal you are relating with, it's the same thing only it's with yourself. Beyond that basic fact though, also just keep in mind that you are dealing with a living breathing human being, which is beyond any theories about them, any day. Now don't get the idea that I am saying it's a problem, but I guess you could say even just looking at life is better than just thinking about it. How about this: I live, therefore I am.

  • cellomould
    cellomould

    good points Intro,

    It is quite different to see 'the world' clearly than to see clearly your place in it. And as you say, ideas are just ideas. The next step is behavior...I wish I could say everything with ideas...but I must say things with my actions.

    Is this similar to what you were thinking?

    cellmould

  • Introspection
    Introspection

    Well, all I was trying to say was you have to first see yourself and then you're able work on it, whatever it is - rather than just have all these nice ideas and in effect be doing a lot of empty work around it. Techniques for self-help could become a sort of defense mechanism, to the point where you never even really take an honest look at yourself much less start to "work on" yourself. To look at it from another perspective, a lot of people are self centered in their views, and they don't realize it. Instead of asking "why do I think this way?" it's more likely that they want to get other people to agree with them and do what they want, they are the center of the universe. Even if you are after some kind of self-improvement, you've got this idea, this picture in your head of what an improved self should look like. So I don't mean having a particular goal in mind, but I guess it's just a matter of being able to deal with life. To be frank and blunt, most people's attitude seems to be that life isn't cooperating, that it should be how they think it should be - that kind of sums it up. Now we are of course all participants, but then all you have to do is participate, getting worked up about something that's plainly a fact is just not going to get you anywhere. Now maybe someone is just in the habit of getting worked up in some way, well then don't get worked up about that. It's an opportunity to see yourself, not as the behavior, mental or otherwise (which is just another concept) but through it. What I'm saying is actually so retardedly simple that it's a wonder why it needs to be said at all, but people seems to try the more technical stuff before some of these basics, who knows why.. Is it any wonder why human beings have problems with each other? If you can't even accept yourself and be with yourself, how are you going to accept someone else?

    Edited by - Introspection on 3 October 2002 5:23:20

  • SPAZnik
    SPAZnik

    yep, i'm workin' on myself. how 'bout you?

    SPAZ (of the "work in progress" klass).

  • cellomould
    cellomould

    Intro,

    I like what you are saying. If only we could take all the 'supposed to's out of life. You are right...that's what makes things difficult. There are no 'supposed to's. We are experiencing something new. Humans and life on earth have only been around so long, and things are constantly changing.

    People that are dynamic and flexible don't complain about their 'lot in life'.

    But then again, it is still one thing for me to say all this...another to live it wholeheartedly...I am still a reluctant participant sometimes.

    cellmould

  • Satanus
    Satanus

    At first, i thought you were talking about the barriers that people use to protect themselves. Ideas, being busy, part of an org, etc. These same things darken the mirror in which they could see themselves clearly.

    SS

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