PLEASE HELP ME

by helpme222 15 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • helpme222
    helpme222

    I am 16 years old and I was raised as a jehovah's witness, but I want out. The whole society is based on brainwashing, propaganda and greed. My parents are so brainwashed about it that when i told her thnta i didn't want to be part of this religion anymore, she cried. I don't know what to do, if I have to continue living this life, I will break, how can I solve this, How can I reach out to my parents, I can't talk to them because they believe everything that the religion throws at them

    please help me

  • james_woods
    james_woods

    You may already be farther along than you think in getting free.

    You are thinking for yourself. You had the gumption to post on this site. I say - keep doing both! - also,

    I would suggest some "submarine silent running" until you are of legal age...and also to be making some serious educational plans. Don't let somebody force you into baptism against your will.

    James

    PS - don't make my mistake. I sort of knew what you know at your same age and let myself go through the motions another 15 years...and regret it to this day.

  • undercover
    undercover

    Welcome to the board.

    Unfortunately you're in a tough situation. Yes, you're right about the religion and the brainwashing, propaganda and greed. But, you live in your parents house and therefore you have to abide by their rules. If they require you to go to meetings and conventions, you may have to obey, but that doesn't mean you have to believe it. Go through the motions but research everything for yourself and come to your own conclusions.

    Hopefully you aren't baptized. If not, do not get baptized. If you can remain unbaptized then it can make it easier to walk away in a couple of years when you go to college or move out on your own.

    I don't recommend creating a battlefield over this unless they expect you to get baptized or committ to something like pioneering or Bethel. If you can keep things relatively calm, maybe you can show them that you are mature enough to make your own decisions on things and even if they don't like it, they might reluctantly agree to let you do your own thing.

    Good luck.

  • garybuss
    garybuss

    My parents threatened to throw me out in the street like yesterday's trash when I was maybe 10 years old and didn't want to go to meetings anymore. I knew they were serious, so I just made the best of a bad situation.

    I skipped college and still went to meetings after high school. Then in 1966 when I was 22 years old the Society started the 1975 hype. I didn't like the Witness life and I didn't like being a Witness but I was enough of a believer that I stayed around to see the year text for 1974.

    In the mean time I get married to a Witness woman in 1967. She died wishing and waiting for Armageddon in 1975 on Tuesday, January 12, 1971.

    I married another Witness woman on September 22, 1971 and by 1974 we had two sons.

    I left the Witnesses in 1974 and my wife stayed and WW3 started. By 1979 we had 4 sons.

  • DannyBloem
    DannyBloem

    Hi,

    you are in a difficult situation, where pain and hurt are inevitable.

    You can throw away your life, and follow suit, but you probably could not do that forever. It would also be very hurtful.

    You can break away violently, must will cause many hurt also.

    I woudl opt for a middle way. try to slowly go out. let your parent know that you just do not believe the teachings. Give good arguments, if they want to listen. Assure them that you love them.
    They try to do what they think is best for you, remember that. That would ease the pain they cause you, by forcing their religion on you.

    take care and good luck

    Danny

  • lowden
    lowden

    Hey there and welcome to the forum!

    There is no easy solution to your situation but it sounds like you need to carry it through, for your own sake and honour.

    One of the hallmarks of the JW faith is that it splits families asunder. It's a crime IMO.

    Stay around here for a time and learn, learn mind-blowing, TRUE facts about the WTS and god.

    You are your own person my friend....be that person and NOT someone that someone else wants you to be.

    Peace and an easy mind to you

    Lowden

  • Wasanelder Once
    Wasanelder Once

    Ok,

    Just because you're 16 doesn't mean you have to give up your self respect. I assume you love your parents and they love you. This difference of opinion on the JW thing is the main conflict? They probably see you as too immature to see clearly the results of your rejecting the faith. Oddly enough, they probably feel you are old enough to choose the way of the truth and get baptized. Confusing, eh?

    Is there someone you want to date, is that behind your reasonableness? Not trying to trivialize it at all, its actually quite common that one questions the witness doctrine when it forbids normal activities.

    You have little choice but to do as they say in a physical way, attend meetings etc. Might as well roll with it. You don't have to agree with it, or for that matter live it to the letter. Girlfriend or boyfriend on the side, smoking? (Ugh) whatever you do, you will do it anyway. The main thing is that you not give up your right to BELIEVE what you want no matter what they cram down your throat. You can do this. Its only two years. Stick with the board here and you'll get plenty of listening ears.

    All the best,

    W.Once

  • sass_my_frass
    sass_my_frass

    Hi love. Good for you for knowing who you are! Be true to yourself.

    Okay that's vague advice. You're stuck, unfortunately, for now. If they're the 'under my roof you obey my rules' types, you can either go through the ongoing battle of trying to fight their choice, or you can just grin and bear it until you're old enough to get out and look after yourself. Perhaps in the meantime you can organise a compromise with them; you'll go to say one meeting a week but not field service. You'll be in a 'family study' as long as it's a place where you can say what you want, like if you want to disagree with something.

  • 4JWY
    4JWY

    (((helpme222)))

    Don't give up - be your own self - listen to your own intuition and be proud to use your own brain.

    On a clear day, you can see forever......remember, compared to you, your jw parents have had many days clouded with brainwashing. I had 42 years worth being raised as a jw - but now my brain has been washed clean! (...to use their thought...)

    My teen son, raised as a jw like you, was in great pain and I couldn't believe that there would be any "god/organization/way of life" that would expect/demand a parent to become so heartsick to see their child use their own brain in a way that wasn't identical to them. (ie: crying moms)

    Well, I wasn't gonna cry over seeing him THINK differently, and to reverse a "platform experience" :

    As a result of allowing him, while still a minor in our home, to THINK, his dad and I and brother all started to THINK and be honest with one another and have all walked away from the cult - hand in hand with him. He was the cause of US activatating our brains and the joy i now have as a parent, observing him enjoying life and being the person he always was, hidden from view, is indescribeable. May your mom one day know that same joy.

    Appeal to her womanly sensibilities in whatever way you can. Be loving and kind in explaining your thoughts. How can a mom resist that?

    **** Find a copy of the 8-8-88 AWAKE and share the articles with your folks on one CHOOSING their own religion vs. CHANCE of being born into one. ***

    I would suggest too, in addition to all the great folks you will meet here at JWD, that you talk to a school counselor, and/or, find in the community some resources for teens that often offer no cost counseling and/or mental health care and get professional help, particularly if you are feeling depressed or overwhelmed.

    If you'd ever like to talk more, feel free to pm me and my family.

    4JWY

    .

  • anewme
    anewme

    Dear Helpme, the news is still fresh. Give your parents time to get used to the idea that you are not going further in this religion. Stand firm. Over time they will have to accept your decision.

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