Jam, I am sorry that your ex said that to your kids. Jw's can be so cruel.
The Silence, it must have been very uncomfortable to be shunned and ignored by your father when you were only 13. I laud the fact that you were able to forgive him so easily. Forgiveness is a quality that is becoming more rare in the world, and it is refreshing to see someone such as yourself so willing after all that he did to you.
I was beaten a lot, usually by my mother but I didn't mind that as much as the verbal words. My father would sometimes tell me that he hated me, called me worthless, useless, that I wasn't his son (Even though he really was my father), and he told me that I disgusted him and made him sick. My mother would call me Queer, Sissy, Rag Doll, Squishy Marshmallow, muffin, and a Dish rag. Take out the trash, Queer; do the dishes Sissy, etc. When my mother called me those things, the look on her face was one of anger mixed with disgust, so much so that she even spit on my face one time, but the look on my father's face was as if I was a piece of sh*t that got stuck on his shoe mixed with pure hatred. No exaggerations. After all of these years, I can still see the look on his face, and I can still feel how it made me feel.
It was very emotional for me, and I spent many days crying when I was alone. But, I didn't dare cry when they were around though, or I would get beaten and the names would start again. The very last words that I ever heard my father say to me was when they found out that I was Gay, and he said that I may as well be a murderer or rapist, and as far as he was concerned he has no son. My mother agreed with him, and my mother told me that they threw away any pictures that they had of me. That was the last I ever heard from my father, he died several years later, and I didn't find out until 3 years after the fact when I found his obituary on the internet. My mother wouldn't even call me to tell me that he died, and when I asked her about it, she told me that I would have to find out about her on the internet too.
My parents had the appearance of being the perfect couple. My father was even the P.O. on the cong. JW's are all about appearance. If others only knew what went on behind closed doors.
Sorry for the long post, but I couldn't stop typing. It feels so good to get something out that has been bottled up for awhile.