DRY BEGGING.... (page 3)

LV101

Snoozy is there a book or an article online about "dry begging." great term.

you certainly have been a kind, generous, parent and it's very difficult to get tough w/the kiddies. there are good/bad psychologists out there, and i have a family member who almost lost her mind dealing with a daughter bumming off of her (it's very common) and finally got help thru a self-help, 12-step group, that deals w/family. if you want the group's name, holler --- i've mentioned several times in past and nobody probably wants to hear about again. i have to say i've seen first hand the help/progress these people have made and one even leads one of the programs in her city.

LV101

MISERYLOVESELDERS --- I'M ROLLING reading your post and love the way you write/express yourself. you are too funny what you say about yourself --- what candor.

yeah, it's strange how that ole saying about no good deed goes unpunished. unfortunately, i've found it to be so very true and it's sad because we love to help out and give to others and then we get hit in the head - DUH, again! had a sister in hall yrs. ago give me the very best advice (and one of the smartest gals i ever met) and she straight up told me --- don't give anyone anything EVER because they HATE YOU FOR IT, they hate you that you can afford it and will never respect you. i started laughing because i thought she was just chidding me --- NOT!!!! she tried to set me straight, and it FINALLY SUNK IN ONE FINE DAY.

Snoozy

LV, as long as I have found out such a thing exists I am happy. It gives me a place to start. I know my daughter has some kind of addiction problem and until she acknowledges it there is nothing I can do but lay down rules on my end. She is in her 50's, way old enough to take care of herself. I know she likes to have a drink or two or three when she gets home from work and Vodka is the drink of her choice. I recently learned that many alcholics have that as a drink of choice as it doesn't smell..

I also know she goes gambling often on her lunch hour. The casino is right accross the street from her work. I also know when she has blown her money she gets real testy and argumentative later. Also I figure she is out of money for booze/pills when she starts arguing with everything someone says.

I also recently learned she has been getting painkillers form a friend..strong ones. The friend is now telling her she needs them herself and cannot give them out any longer..the friend has medical reasons why she herself needs them. My daughter is now saying she has migranes and has been to ER twice in the last month. Each time getting what she wants (drugs) and never following up with a Dr later. This time she says she has an appointment Tuesday as she was in ER Sat before last for a headache. This was when I felt sorry for her and filled her tank and gave her cash..I didn't want her to feel stressed. I later learned a friend of hers came over that night and they drank Tequila all night. She was bragging about it on facebook the next day and I caught it .

I figured they got the booze with my money as the friend never ever seems to have any money..but he does have access to drugs for sale..just saying, I'm wising up! (And it is pissing her off).

Snoozy

LV..lol. I am sure my daughter thought the same thing about me..hated that I had the money and not her..she was quite wealthy when she was married and had all she wanted..and treated others as her slaves..now she has to work for everything.No respect..she still has that attitude but not the money..

Now she has more income, at least twice, of what I have coming in. It is just her an dher son and she makes plenty. She is just blowing it somewhere and expecting myself and at one time other family members to pick up the pieces..now she is being called on it and doesn't like it.

AS far as her headaches, I hear you get them from drug withdrawls also..and I would even doubt she went to the ER if she didn't get the drugs. I also really doubt she even has a Dr appointment or if she does that she will keep it.

This is the same daughter that faked her urine test recently to get a part time job (yes you can do that)..why the need to fake a urine test?

Snoozy

PublishingCult

Wow, those boobs look really really good . . .

Dry begging?

LV101

Snoozy --- sounds like you know her game and i can understand your trying to help her anyway you possibly can. Too bad these emergency rooms don't call in psychiatrists so people can get real help but i guess until they're ready it would be a waste of time.

you certainly aren't in denial about her and it must be very distressing to you. life is so difficult and i guess we can compare it to having family members in the cult gambling their life away on the hope of paradise tomorrow and getting their addiction satisfied weekly.

keep care of yourself.

Snoozy

LOL Publishing Cult..

LV101, I totally agree..they give up the life they know now on the promises of a few men..what a waste..

Snoozy

got help thru a self-help, 12-step group, that deals w/family. if you want the group's name, holler --- i've mentioned several times in past and nobody probably wants to hear about again. i have to say i've seen first hand the help/progress these people have made and one even leads one of the programs in her city.

I appreciate that and the one thing I would need help with possibly is bringing up her addiction or addictions with her. She gets very hostile and defensive. To the point of shutting you out of her life.She classes it as trying to pick a fight..which of course put me in the bad guy role in the past..I now realize it is all a part of her game to munipulate the situation.

I may consider it in the future if things start to spiral as I have a feeling they will eventually. Her son will be gone this summer to his dads and I am hoping that the second job (If she keeps it) will keep her busy and give her extra money. She did say she read the article I posted on addictions and that for her was good!

Snoozy

the_raisin

Well, when my in-laws (whom I live with) make carne asada on the weekends, when the crazy weather allows, the little kids on our block like to swing around and literally swing in our fence while licking their lips and complementing the aromas. SO we always give them food. But just cuz they're cute :D.

When we had cookouts or picnics with the Kingdom Hall during the summer, my mom would always have to buy and prepare twice as much as her family would consume. Why? Well, lucky for her she's a really good cook, so all the brothers and sisters would dry beg for them sausages or ribs. Damn those ribs were good... and since she was the only who knew how to actually make ribs, yeah, my dad would often be fuming when he realized there were none left for him. Once, I had a cute boy flirt with me... just for me to find out he was lusting after my mother's weenies.

They were also creative. Yup. Dry begging, how I miss thee...

Snoozy

LOL the raisin!

Snoozy

DRY BEGGING....

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