Were you Stalked or Chased After Once you Exited the JW's by Elders ?

by flipper 175 Replies latest jw friends

  • Magwitch
    Magwitch

    I had not been in service for about 10 years and had not been to a meeting in a couple of years. I had unscriptually divorced my Jdub husband, but still no one bothered to harass me. However, I did feel an obligation to my ex to let the elders know that he had scriptual grounds to remarry. I wrote the letter out of love for my ex, NOT because I felt a need to confess. I simply wrote a one line letter to the body of elders letting them know that "Mr. ______ ______ has grounds to remarry. " I figured I had been out long enough from the borg to not have me round up and hauled in. Boy, was I wrong! That body of elders were determined to have a JC with me. I could not understand why they kept setting up JC meetings. They would call to tell me when it was. Of course I never showed up. They even sent me 3 different certified letters (that I of course would not sign for) Did they need any more information than the one line letter I wrote them?

  • flipper
    flipper

    Wow ! Did this thread experience re-birth or what ? LOL ! Thanks for the replies. This topic must touch a lot of your lives !

    SCOTT77- So you got stalked on your job as well ? Wow. Even after you moved to another state ? Wow again ! It's incredible how these hounder elders try to ruin lives ! I hope you are getting some peace now - hopefully.

    NELLY 136- I'm glad your co-workers got the REAL view of what witnesses are like !

    BLONDIE- LOL ! At that experience ! Serves the elders right for acting like stalking freaks outside a witnesses house at midnight ! Too bad the police didn't book em' ! I can only imagine when you tried explaining the JW policies of elders staking out houses to bust a person to DF them- the strange stares and head shaking that the police gave you ! People on the OUTSIDE of the witnesses and WT organization have ALWAYS seen them as strange- now WE know why after being out ourselves for years !

    AK JEFF- I'm glad you hung up on the elders who tried to trap you in your words on the phone. Be glad you did- they probably were recording you, or attempting to. I definitely agree- they are a$$holes and their crack is as wide as the Grand Canyon for everyone to see.

    TROUBLED MIND - I remember your threads you posted about the extent the elders were harassing you !Good for you that you called the police ! Right on. It's too bad it had to come to that for the thick, dense elders to FINALLY leave you alone- but hey, that's why police are there, you know ? Hopefully these losers will leave you and your husband alone and not bother you anymore. Good luck with that.

    WASBLIND- Yeah, the WT society's a-hole is so big wth their lies- no way to hide it.

    VAMPIREDCLXV- I'm so sorry you were harassed and stalked like that, especially being in a fragile state. The paranoia will go away in time- I promise. Sometimes moving away from your former congregation's territory works. I moved 40 miles away initially and it helped for a few years. If you haven't been to meetings for a couple years I wouldn't let them rob you of your joy of life. You've probably dropped off their radar by now if they haven't called on you in awhile. Go ahead and date some lady's , you deserve some true happiness in your life my friend ! We can't live the rest of our lives in fear of what elders may or may not do. They're just human like you and me.

    MAMALOVE- I would be careful in dealing with your JW ex-husband. I have an ex-wife ( divorced in 1998 ) who has made a life's career out of trying to get the elders to chase after me - even YEARS after our divorce ! I believe she does it to influence my JW adult daughters against me. My side of the family see's that she is a tool- but she has gossipped about me far and wide where we used to live. I'd be careful in how much personal information you give out to your ex. It's none of his business what you do with your life- but remember, many JW's ARE nosy and they MAKE it their business so they can wreck your new free life. So be careful.

    SCARRED FOR LIFE - I hear you. My parents probably have't got over me not attending either. But it is THEIR problem, like you said, not mine.

    HADIT- Thanks. Glad you are enjoying the thread. Isn't it incredible how many people have been harassed ? I'm sorry you are going through this stalking and harassment currently. If you ever want to talk to get some ideas, please PM me your number, or I'll PM you my number and we could talk. I agree- this WT organization is losing lots of good people due to the extreme control exercised over their members lives ! The intense ultra control is crazy ! And the paranoia between members turning each other in for broken nails ! I'll PM you my number. Peace. Hang in there.

    BLITHE FRESHMAN- Wow. Did you ever go through some stalking for sure ! It even had to go to an elders meeting to get the guy to stop ? I'm glad your husband saw the light and supported you through all the crap happening. Did the elders end up DFing you for smoking after all ? I hope not, if you had family still in. It's horrible how the elders become Nazi policemen and ruin people's lives ! I hope things are calmer for you now ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • flipper
    flipper

    MAGWITCH- I hear what you are saying. I too received certified letters to come to a JC from the elders - and I had not been attending meetings for three and a half years ! I had moved 80 miles away and they STILL chased after me to come to a JC ! How sad is that , here you out of love for your ex just wanted to be kind and set him free in his own religion to marry again- yet the elders used that information as a whipping stick to bash you over the head with and malign your reputation ? I swear- I can't stand this cult. It needs to go away in a permanent way. I'm sorry you were mistreated that way. I hope you have peace in your life now

  • flipper
    flipper

    HADIT- You have a PM from me. Please check. Thanks ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • Blithe Freshman
    Blithe Freshman

    Wow ! Did this thread experience re-birth or what ? LOL ! Thanks for the replies. This topic must touch a lot of your lives !

    The thread was posted on Freeminds! I rarely come here any more.

    BLITHE FRESHMAN- Wow. Did you ever go through some stalking for sure ! It even had to go to an elders meeting to get the guy to stop ? I'm glad your husband saw the light and supported you through all the crap happening. Did the elders end up DFing you for smoking after all ? I hope not, if you had family still in. It's horrible how the elders become Nazi policemen and ruin people's lives ! I hope things are calmer for you now ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

    Yes , I had to meet with an elder to stop it. It went on for years , I knew who it was but couldn't prove it. KWIM? Only when he spread the rumor to accuse someone else, I have no idea why, did I have anything I could prove. There were several witnesses to his accusations & it had become gossip. It was all covered up, but the drive-by & phone calls ended. It was one of many eye openers for me talking to the elder , seeing how they treated the situation.

    The harassment was mostly phone calls. I would get dozens a day sometimes , as often as every 5 minutes for an hour or more at a time. We had a business run from our home , and teens out & about , so I needed to answer when it rang. During this time I had an infant & toddler that often found their mommy time interrupted. Through keeping a log of the calls I was able to see a pattern of when to expect them & know when they would stop. It became obvious then who was making them.

    To the elder I spoke with , I stressed my chief concern was for the spiritual state of the brother calling and my frustration of not feeling I actually had proof enough to speak with him and possibly correct his way of handling his feelings in a mature way. I tried several times bringing up my concerns for the falsely accused young brother and the gossip resulting from it. I did let him know that no one living in our home had ever spoken about the calls & my family was not aware yet of my beliefs who was doing the calling. The conversation was like talking to a rock. No expressions were ever made to me of sadness of what it was putting me through.No interest was expressed for the young teen on the fringe or his reputation. I was patronized at every turn till I mentioned I had contacted both the phone company & was prepared to call the police to make a formal complaint at the first I could name someone. That got the elders attention! My calls ended that day. No apology or contact was ever made to me by the brother in question or elder. I received a message through my husband, the matter had been looked into, the brother was surely not the one calling & I should not speak about it.

    The malicious pranks and other problems were handled the same way by elders I spoke with. The exception was conversations I had with the presiding overseer, his counseling sessions exposed a line of thinking and mind I can only describe as psychopathic, his comments & reasoning were so twisted , it was scary.

    Yes , I was dfed for smoking, I did not understand all the workings at that time. I did know to be guarded in what I said & not ruffle their feathers.I was most afraid of being called apostate if it was found out what I thought. My family stood behind me, not too close behind , but they didn't shun me. My husband was at my hearing & it helped to open his eyes a little.The RBC problems, my dfing, & the veiled hints for him to divorce me all worked on him.

    Thanks for asking,Flipper, yes things are much better now. I appreciate the chance to vent. I will be giving my testimony next month at the Witness4Jesus convention, these stories are being left out. My husband & 5 of 6 children are out. Always nice talking with you.

    Blithe

  • VampireDCLXV
    VampireDCLXV

    Scarred for life & flipper, thank you for your kind words.
    I'm not entirely certain if I'm really off my congo's radar. Why? Every few months my out of town mother (who is still in) comes to stay with me here in [not telling] so that she can see her sister (who's in a local nursing home), visit old friends and go to meetings/FS in my old congo. They all know her and me. My folks also own a rental property here too. I suppose that I'll only have peace if I move far away and don't permit JW family to visit. I've got some rebuilding to do yet before I'm ready to start dating anyway.

    Thanks for listening...

    V665

  • Hadit
    Hadit

    Thanks Flipper! You're awesome !

  • flipper
    flipper

    BLITHE FRESHMAN- I'm glad things are much better for you now my friend. Man oh man- did you ever go through some pressure. Isn't it sad that you sought protection and solace from your elders due to the freak stalking you with crank phone calls- and all you got were hush, hush sessions from elders trying to quiet you down ? And callous treatment- especially when you wanted to involve the police ? JW elders are all about outward appearances to the public- not about actually solving problems . I'm glad you and your husband are out ! As well as 5 children ! Good for you.

    VAMPIREDCLXV- You are welcome my friend. So it seems like your mom still comes and visits you - while still keeping in touch with relatives and JW friends. Just be cautious in what you say to her as far as opening up about your doubts about the organization. I don't know HOW devout your mom is if she'd go running to elders or not- or is she more committed to her relationship with you ? Thus the need for cautious words when speaking with her. I have to do this with my JW family always too. I can be more open with some than others - each JW family member is different. Anytime you need to talk, just PM me O.K. ?

    HADIt- You are welcome my friend. Always here if you want to talk. Take care, Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • Scott77
    Scott77

    SCOTT77- So you got stalked on your job as well ? Wow. Even after you moved to another state ? Wow again ! It's incredible how these hounder elders try to ruin lives ! I hope you are getting some peace now - hopefully.
    flipper

    Yeah Mr. Flipper. To this day, I have not yet seen any stalking but what is clear is that, the Watchtower accepted my disassociation through a formal letter. So i see no way can these sick people continue to stalk me. Yeah, they stalked me after I moved from one state to another nearby state. Their level of coordination through local area's congregations is amazing. As bad as stalking is, I learnt something about the Watchtower through that personal experiences. The watchtower is so sickening, rotten and hypocritical. The nice ties and suits they wear at meetings to me, are sideshows to impress the public.

    Scott77

  • blondie
    blondie

    Sometimes they keep stalking if there is a jw spouse who wants proof for a scriptural divorce; usually only if it is a family member or "good" friend.

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