I just want this to stop!

by mrsjones5 40 Replies latest social family

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5

    As some of you know my husband became ill and we lost our house in Indiana. My parents offered to help and although I really didn't want to do it knowing that my parents have limited resources I really didn't have a choice. I also wanted to come back to a place that was familiar and where most of my family and friends are. So we came and it's been almost hell. My parents were able to secure us an apartment but they didn't have a rental agreement when we arrived which delayed getting my children in school by a week. My parents came with me when I tried to get the kids in school, big mistake, Mother tried to bully and push her weight around and even threw a card at the poor lady who told her what she didn't want to hear. All because I didn't have the stupid rental agreement!

    Geez there is so much to tell on this sad tale but I will say this: I had to go out yesterday and get another dead bolt lock. My father has been harassing me, calling me names and demanding access to my apartment. He claims he has the right to come in at anytime (he has a key) to make sure we are living right. He's threaten to call social services about my kids. WTF?!! He's threated to call welfare because I haven't found a job yet (he thinks I don't want to work yeah right, I got four kids (one with autism) and a disabled husband - I work everyday!). He's even threaten to call the health department and bring them to my door (I do not live in filth).

    So where is stands now is I'm not responding to anything my parents say. I'm letting all calls from them go to voicemail. I've changed that lock and when my father comes he won't be able to get in. I just hope I don't have to call the cops.

    What a freakin mess

    Josie

  • Witness 007
    Witness 007

    Wow bad news.....as someone who just got out of a nightmare situation with my wife's depression I can only say I hope and know things will change for you and get better.

  • aSphereisnotaCircle
    aSphereisnotaCircle

    Wow, that's incredible MrsJones.

    You must be a rock to put up with all that!

    When I've been in hard times the one thing that brings me comfort is knowing that all things change,

    nothing ever stays the same.

    And so sooner or later, hard times must change too.

  • OUTLAW
    OUTLAW

    Josie..What a frigg`n mess!!.........Don`t take any crap from your parents..Put them both in thier place now..Your going to have to do it,to have any peace in your life.................Good Luck!...........................OUTLAW

  • FlyingHighNow
    FlyingHighNow

    Mrs. Jones. I deeply and profoundly empathize with you. Things didn't go well when we moved to KNoxville to live my brother Evan, after Andy's accident. Family can mean well, but they can make your nightmares much worse. I hope things will end up a lot better for you as they have for me.

  • beksbks
    beksbks

    I'm so sorry Mrs. Jones! I was hoping you were enjoying being back in Cali.

  • WuzLovesDubs
    WuzLovesDubs

    Restraining order mama. I dont care if he IS your father, if he doesnt OWN the apartment you live in he does NOT have the right to enter any time he wants to. Nor would the real landlord. There are tenant rights. If he doesnt quit harrassing you, get a restraining order. When people help you it does not give them license to OWN you and CONTROL you and CHECK UP ON YOU.

    You are doing what is, again, in the best interests of your family honey, sometimes that includes tough love. Been there done that.

    hugs, LD

  • StAnn
    StAnn

    Poor Josie. My parents also aren't able to accept that I am grown and don't answer to them anymore. Particularly my dad. No matter how I live, I will never be "living right" in my dad's eyes unless I reach perfection, and then he'd probably criticize me for putting on airs.

    I've learned that, no matter how bad things get, I can never, never, never, ever ask for or accept any kind of help from my parents. The price is always too high. I was actually homeless once. My dad offered me a place to stay~I preferred living in my car because I knew that, once he got his hooks into me, it would be excruciatingly painful to get them out.

    I'm sorry things are tough for you right now. With all the stress you have, this is just a little more stress that you don't need, eh?

    Chin up. We love you.

    St. Ann

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5

    I am enjoying being back home in California, Beks. As long as I don't have to deal with my parents it's all good. The kids are in school and doing great. We've reconnected with family and friends and haven't even reached or seen everyone yet. It's going to be a good summer. I just have to kick my parents to the curb.

    Wuz, yeah I looked up restraining orders and right now I don't think a judge would grant me one. My poor husband is royally pissed and I've told him not to even think of touching my father (he's 68 and not in the best of health). It's better to change the lock and call the cops if my father comes over and loses his mind. Oh, and you read my mind, I looked up California Tenant Rights and my father doesn't have a leg to stand on.

    Thanks Ann, if I had the choice I would not have accepted the help from my parents. All I can do now is try and keep this from getting any crazier and pay my parents back as soon as possible.

    Thanks everyone for your replies. It's all been very stressful (hasn't helped the hubby at all, his pain episodes have been worst) and just talking about it here is helping

    Love you guys

    Josie

  • passwordprotected
    passwordprotected

    Very, very sorry to hear this.

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