I recently watched a movie called “Instinct”. It starred Anthony Hopkins and told the story about a man who went to the wild to live with the gorillas. While the premise may have seemed farfetched, the movie offered an insight I had not thought of till I saw how the story was told. The story tells about a man who went to live in the wild and was accepted into a family of gorillas to the final point of trust where he would even baby sit their young. As part of the gorilla ”family” he also came under their protection from anything that would threaten them also. At one point hunters found the gorilla group and started to kill them as they fled in fear. Mr. Hopkins attacked the hunters with a club, killed a couple, but was overwhelmed by their numbers. As he lay on the ground being kicked and beaten the leader of the gorilla’s a large silverback male charged to his rescue. The gorilla was promptly dispatched in a hail of bullets. As the gorilla lay dying his eyes met Mr. Hopkins who also lay with a boot on his head, injured, yet realizing this gorilla was acting on instinct to protect his family, he gave his life to protect Mr. Hopkins who had become a part of the gorilla’s family.
As I watched this scene I became filled with a great sense of grief. I asked myself why, and as I began to think about it I realized I have been acting on “instinct” the last few months. I got to thinking about why I am in the position I am in. It was because I came to learn of a danger to my family of brothers and sisters. Many have been victims of the hunters or should I say leaders of the Watchtower Organization, who have no remorse but to preserve an “image” of Jehovah’s Witnesses at the expense of however many lives may get in the way. The victims are expendable, easily disposed of with a quick DF much like a bullet to the head of something perceived to be in the way of progress or the greater good.
When the victims speak out they are much like Mr. Hopkins who was striking out to stop the slaughter. They quickly are smashed to the ground by the powers that be with a force they cannot overcome. I could see myself as the large male silverback charging in to try and defend those who were being beaten by those who have the upper hand. I feel the sting of bullets as everything I have known has been taken away. The way of life, the friendships, my parents, the respect, etc.. I feel my life slipping away as my eyes meet the eyes of those who suffer in silence or who have been silenced for the sake of Watchtower “image.” Is it over? Not as long as the instinct survives.
It is the instinct the fight to protect your own that makes you who you are. The instinct fuels the rage, the blind charge against overwhelming odds that offers no other solution. Outrage that leadership of those who claim to worship God would allow the weak to suffer as disposable commodities. This instinct is what provides motivation to never stop charging those who perpetrate evil as long as there is the force of life in your body.
So yes, there is a grief, a loss, a sadness, that is to be found in the eyes of those who suffer, the fear in the eyes of those who are afraid to fight, the coldness in the eyes of those who do not care, the ignorance in the eyes of those who do not understand, the pain in the eyes of those whose instinct forces them to fight to the death those who would harm their own.