Just wanted to send a belated thank you to everyone for their kind remarks.
WillyLoman, what you said was very interesting and really gives me hope.
Writing this letter really did help me. I was wallowing in anger and bitterness, but after I got (almost) everything out that I wanted to say, it was easier for me to let go of the negativity more than I ever had before.
I try to remind myself of how brainwashed I was after 30 years. I can?t imagine what it must be like to be in for 60 years, like my parents.
Some of you requested an update as to whether or not I received a response. My mom sent a card that thanked me for the letter and said they would be writing and/or calling me.
Unfortunately, before my parents could respond to the letter, they found out that my mom?s cancer had returned after two years and is now in her lungs. Her doctors have given her a positive forecast and she just started chemo and radiation two weeks ago.
Not to be too macabre, but at least we?re talking to each other again for regular health updates. It was very strange to hear my father?s voice for the first time in two years. Neither of us acknowledged how long it had been since we last spoke, just had a normal conversation like we talk to each other every day. He told me he had been saving his vacation days so they could come to visit their granddaughter and me, but instead he had to use them all driving my mom back and forth to the hospital. That was very unexpected and good to hear (not the hospital driving part, the other thing about coming to visit).
I sent my mom flowers a couple weeks ago, timed (coincidentally [not]) to arrive on my birthday. She must have written to me the second she received them because I got a card two days later which said that she had just returned home from her first chemo treatment and what a lovely surprise it was to find the flowers waiting for her, how she had been thinking about me all day, how it was snowing that day, just as it was 37 years ago in the blizzard of ?67, etc. She went on to reminisce about how she had to ride to the hospital on a snowplow when she was in labor with me (still have the newspaper clipping) and how happy they were to have a little girl. It?s the closest thing to a birthday card I?ve ever received from them.
All that?s happened, including our conversations, in the past month has made me realize that I need to ignore the label the JW religion has given me. It?s THEIR label, not mine. Even after my mom recovers, I?m going to call and talk to them whenever Ihave the urge. I truly feel in my heart that they would never tell me they didn?t want to talk to me once they heard my voice. Guess time will tell on that one...
Anyway, thanks again to everyone for the support you've given me over the last few years (even though you don't know me since I never post).
-L
WillyLoman, what you said was very interesting and really gives me hope.
Writing this letter really did help me. I was wallowing in anger and bitterness, but after I got (almost) everything out that I wanted to say, it was easier for me to let go of the negativity more than I ever had before.
I try to remind myself of how brainwashed I was after 30 years. I can?t imagine what it must be like to be in for 60 years, like my parents.
Some of you requested an update as to whether or not I received a response. My mom sent a card that thanked me for the letter and said they would be writing and/or calling me.
Unfortunately, before my parents could respond to the letter, they found out that my mom?s cancer had returned after two years and is now in her lungs. Her doctors have given her a positive forecast and she just started chemo and radiation two weeks ago.
Not to be too macabre, but at least we?re talking to each other again for regular health updates. It was very strange to hear my father?s voice for the first time in two years. Neither of us acknowledged how long it had been since we last spoke, just had a normal conversation like we talk to each other every day. He told me he had been saving his vacation days so they could come to visit their granddaughter and me, but instead he had to use them all driving my mom back and forth to the hospital. That was very unexpected and good to hear (not the hospital driving part, the other thing about coming to visit).
I sent my mom flowers a couple weeks ago, timed (coincidentally [not]) to arrive on my birthday. She must have written to me the second she received them because I got a card two days later which said that she had just returned home from her first chemo treatment and what a lovely surprise it was to find the flowers waiting for her, how she had been thinking about me all day, how it was snowing that day, just as it was 37 years ago in the blizzard of ?67, etc. She went on to reminisce about how she had to ride to the hospital on a snowplow when she was in labor with me (still have the newspaper clipping) and how happy they were to have a little girl. It?s the closest thing to a birthday card I?ve ever received from them.
All that?s happened, including our conversations, in the past month has made me realize that I need to ignore the label the JW religion has given me. It?s THEIR label, not mine. Even after my mom recovers, I?m going to call and talk to them whenever Ihave the urge. I truly feel in my heart that they would never tell me they didn?t want to talk to me once they heard my voice. Guess time will tell on that one...
Anyway, thanks again to everyone for the support you've given me over the last few years (even though you don't know me since I never post).
-L