MMae	Re: How Jehovah's Witnesses Control Your Mind - Controlling Your View of Truth
	I was about 11 when I began studying with JWs.  I used to cry all the time during my study because they'd teach me things that didn't make sense to me.  What?  Only 144,000 are going to heaven?  BWAAAA!   Of course they'd go on to explain about paradise earth, and I'd dry my tears.  My point is that I always questioned.  And I always expected a reasonable answer.  And of course, as a study, they tolerated and commended me for questioning.  The very fact that I could question, and receive a Bible-based answer was the reason that I accepted the religion as the Truth.  (Besides I'm trusting and gulible!)  But as an adult, with mature reasoning power, I began to find that the answers were not always so Bible-based.  And dare I question the reasoning and scriptral evidence, then the answer became that I must be loyal to the WTS, because to question them was to question God.  Even though I had been around long enough to know that the WTS clearly was out of sync with God at times, by their own admission - I was to buy what they were selling at that given time - hook, line, and sinker - even if my conscience and every fiber of my being said,"THIS IS NOT RIGHT.  IT IS NOT GOD'S WILL!  AND UNLESS I'M MISTAKEN, IT IS THE OPPOSITE OF GOD'S WILL!"  Of course this kind of "independant thinking" and "rebellious spirit" ended up getting me booted.  I humbly accepted my punishment.  It took them turning me away when I asked for re-instatement for me to see the house of cards begin to fall.  It was very painful.  But when I realized that I couldn't go back, I knew that Jehovah was still with me.  He never isolated me, nor did he ever turn me away.  He's always stayed with me, even when I wasn't paying attention to Him.
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