OnTheWayOut	Re: How to make love & marriage work w/a JW
	Please dont comment saying to "run" or "get out while I can" So there's not much else to say.  You know better what you want, so figure it out for yourself. I will say much anyway. Seriously, welcome.  I understand your question, but you gotta understand why we would say "Run."  He is a weak JW to date you, but he may decide to become a strong JW one day. but when we discuss religion (which is often) I am never swayed and he has gotten used to it. So he is always going to look down on your lack of acceptance of his beliefs and you may always look down on his beliefs.  That's a rough way to start a marriage. And as he explained it; life would be much easier for us if we were both JW That's his way of already asserting that the problem is with you.  Life would be easier if HE got out of the JW's instead of remaining one and disobeying their general directive to "marry only in the lord" and to date JW's only with the intent of marrying one of them. our ability to raise kids. I am totally fine with them being raised as witnesses because he is an incredible person with strong values from his faith and I am not religous so I know that it is more important to him than me. It's not about what's important to you.  The kids will be raised as JW's to be taught that Mommie is "wrong" or "worldly" or any number of negative terms like "going to be destroyed at Armageddon."  They will be taught an unhealthy fear of a God who uses the WT organization to control people.  They will miss out on normal activities such as interaction with other kids concerning holidays and birthdays- they might be fearful that Jehovah will destroy them if they wear green on St. Patricks Day or accept a piece of birthday cake from a five-year-old.  They will be expected to go to all those meetings that reinforce the doctrine down their throats and teaches them that Mommie deserves to be destroyed, along with that five-year-old that tried to give them cake.  They will be expected to skip sports and college and set their goals toward selling WT literature full time for free and working part-time to stay poor and barely get by. But, hey- it doesn't matter to YOU. Your future husband will likely take his religion seriously one day, especially after he has kids or after his elders or higher ups tell him why he is not pleasing Jehovah. how do I get him to understand that Im not that kind of woman and dont want to be? I want to get him to realize that we need to be able to work together as equals and he needs to back down on that one? He understands my side but says "thats what the bible says so..." So, like many single people, you are in love but you want to change the other person.  That headship thing is ingrained in them, so there's no hope there sister.  Live with it or RUN.
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