ok, I'm in exactly the same position as you.
I'm want out, hubby wants in. I have many family members in, so I prefer to not get d'f...
I've noticed hubby has 2 completely and utterly different personalities. One great, 1 that sucks - that ones called "jw mode"... In other words, he's awesome until he goes into "JW mode"...
Anyways, we have seen a Phyichiatrist and he is our mediator. Hubby can't go into "JW mode" in front of him... So, I can say whatever I want without the crap from him... I have used this to my advantage... He convinced hubby not to do anything to rat me out to the elders until things are settled between us.
So, what I'm saying is... Take a backstep to everything. Look at your mate. Do you want things to work? Are there things you can do to let them see how you feel about things???
Also, I want to move somewhere. This get's me and hubby out of all connections associated with JWs. I also asked him to take 1 month of for us. Hopefully, he will be able to look at things from an outside perspective...
You know what's best for your personal situation. See both sides of what could happen... It may very well work out, or, it may not at all whatsoever... But, in the end, you have to make the choice on how you want to proceed....